my dad :'(  

rm_starbowler2 52M
49 posts
7/11/2005 3:39 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

my dad :'(


Sunday (7/10) was my nieces' graduation party and it was a great time......I feel so damn old though,I can not believe that my little "peanut" graduated already.It was a great time till we started talking about dad.On July 22,it will be one year since he died.......a year already,I just can not believe that....the pain is still so fresh.Amanda (my niece) started it by saying that she wish "grandpa" was here......and then the water works begain.Why is it taking me so long to get over loseing him?? Why do I still feel so empty inside?? I hate this feeling.......and I hate seeing my mom hurting like she is (don't blame her,they were married for 45 years).I'm trying my best to help out my mom,help with the bills (dad did not leave any life insr. or anything like that,so I had to pay for the wake,funeral,casket and everything).I am mad at him for that.....and that hurts me ,too.How can I be mad at him?? Well,on monday...I am going to visit him again like I always do on mondays....I wish I could over this pain.My life is wonderful.....but I know that it could be even more wonderful if my dad....my best friend....was still here.

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