|Blogs > rm_sharksnsails > After Love|
I had sex.
I had sex.
I have been on an emtional roller coaster.
Because I had sex.
I had sex with a girl I had met just that night.
She was drunk, mostly at first, still by the time we got to it.
It started at the one club I really enjoy gong to, called "The Church" a goth club.
We were dancing and she came on to me, we actually started kissing on the dance floor. She took me by the hand and led me up stairs, where we kissed some more, as I rubbed her inner thiegh (or is it theigh ether way it looks spelled worng) and finally got my hand down the front of her long black skirt. I felt pretty clever that I was feeling her up in public (in pubic, lol) then she started working her hand on my crotch, it felt good, I got massive wood. Then she unzipped my pants, I was like oh yeah shes going to put her hand on my cock, I was wearing a black hat which I took off to hide her exploits when she bent over and started blowing me right there in the club! I tried to hide her head with the hat (what was my plan for her hand), but her body position made it so painfully obvious, and our position in the club was not exactly 100% discrete. I was more than a little nervous about getting tossed out of the club!
So after the third close call, we sort of mutually agreed to go finish dancing till the club closed, and then maybe go home together.
Well the club closes and we wound up staying to about 5:30 am talking to people, and it's a one hour drive back to her place. I've been up like 36 hours by this point so I am dog tired. But my pecker is totally keeping from going to sleep at this point, (ever get half a blow job, and get interupted? believe me at that point the only thing on your mind is finishing) we got to her house, and while I went to the restroom, she got herself undressed and lay down on the bed, WOW! talk about cutting through the bullshit. so I went over to the foot of the bed stripped down and proceeded to kiss my way up her ankles. Biting and nipping liking and even scratchin along the way, she still had her panties on, so I skipped by her waist area all together, started in again at the belly button and worked my way up to her mouth via the cleavage. I gave a few deep pasionate kisses than started back down biting her neck along the way. I pulled her bra down and licked and sucked on her nipple, than started back down along her side licking and biting, this time I did get to the waist in a big way. Grabbing her panties with my teeth, then my fingers, I worked them down noticing that she was shaved bald. She lifted her but and I pulled her panties throwing them halfway across the room. As I worked my way through the stubled area that had once been a bush (like kissing a kiwi fruit) I finaly got to the soft folds where the sweet aroma of poon was waiting to greet my nose and the taste that says, like no other taste can, "dude, your getting laid". Kissing and sucking on the folds my tounge did with great skill and gentilness find her clit, and worked it in perfect style. The one thing I am really really good at (maybe next to playing trumpet) was being shown in wonderful fashon and she rewarded me with that delicious squeal that many men brag about but few (including myself up to this point) have heard. The one that is not fake, nor partially contrived. I have made women come before, I had just never made one get off quite like that (it was I think her third orgasm in the set of about five on that trip down, the whole munching took me about 30 minutes but the last two orgasms were obviously not as powerful, she and I both exhasted my skill ebbing with fatigue.
She did go down on me for a bit, but really was quite obviously done, she did not apply the pasion or skill that she aplied briefly at the club, or slightly less briefly in between O number 2 and 3 (I went back to going down on her because giving me head had made her all wet, and it was obvious to me that she was more interested in getting some more tounge than a wad in the mouth, though I wish she would have put more heart into getting me off.) After her number five, I figured, having thuroughly done my part that she might be ready to treat me to some real oral, and blast me off. but she didn't. she sucked a bit than started her way back up to do some kissing and invite me in. When we got done kissing (I could feel her pulling herself and me together) I asked "do you have any condoms?" (because I knew I didn't) she said "No".
Here is the dilema, she was willing to go bareback, I didn't really want to, and we did anyway. and I hate myself for it. I should have for her protection and mine at that point just said "well then we can't have intercourse" but I didn't. I had not blown that first load (from the club three hours earlier, and was so blue balled by this point I could have fucked a boulder in two. So I did it. I layed her on her back and after about fifteen minutes of pumping her tight pussy (she must do kegels or something) I pulled out and began to pump load after load onto her belly, tits, legs,neck etc. It just kept flowing and flowing, I shot enough load to soak her entire front side. And it was ok (the orgasm was long and powerful, but not near as good as others I have had in terms of total feeling). It just wasnt as good as it could have been. We weren't in love, she really didn't dig me as much as she just wanted me, and I could tell she didnt delite in me getting off that much, (which makes it better too). we had sex a couple more times that night, (morning actually by this point like 8:30 in the morning) and dropped off to sleep. two hours later she woke me up for more sex, which I complied with, starting with oral then to some penetration to blow a couple more loads, then finishing with oral. Having placed each load neatly onto her belly I could tell that fatigue and dehydration were totally getting the best of me, and performance continued to suffer greatly as a result. By the end of it I could tell I had blown my chance. I should have just kept her on a string after that third orgasm, not fucked her at all, and went home and slept.
Because then I wouldn't be writing to tell yall how cheap I felt that she didnt call. maybe it was that I had massive diarehea of the mouth and talked too much in the last hours we had together when my body was to exhasted to be of much physical use. (I didn't want to just leave). And she shared some real private and personal info with me, I really thought I had made a friend, but even at the end that was appearantly not the case, I could tell I was just the hit and run. (yes girls do that too). So we said our good byes and I left. feeling tired and empty. I still do.
and not that good about myself either.
Hope your doing better than me. Even if your not getting laid.
11/10/2005 4:39 am
*calms down a bit* Darlin', I know you're lonely, horny, and were probably a leeeeeeetle drunk, but please, please, carry some condoms with you... god knows where that woman has been...
*gets off soapbox and goes to hug sharks*
Ah, the hit-and-run. Happens to everyone, and you have needs too. Don't feel bad, I'm here for ya if you need to talk, darlin'.
Even better, get your cute lil' ass down here and we'll chat over assorted seafood goodies and rum cocktails After that, well, let's see what happens
Love and snuggles,
11/10/2005 6:21 pm
<<<agrees with PK |
I don't know what to say, I am a bit upset with ya hun. I just had one friend infect his girlfriend with herpes. She knew he had it and still insisted on bareback and oral as well. Which is how you can give andd get Herpes. I hope you test out clean . hugs....this worries me about you hun. I think you might be looking for someone to cling to, this is not sucha good thing. I hate to say it. I went looking for you in LD's tonight hoping you were there cause I someone who has me on IM let me know you were there. and then I checked your blog when I found out you had already left the room. I am sorry that you are so down sweet and you can have my gummies if it will make you feel better, just please do as PK asks andd start carring protection with you all the time ..or at least when you are not on the job. *soft kisses* be sweet and go to the doc sweetie ......
11/10/2005 9:47 pm
PK, and FOX,
The point of this post was not the condom at all, that was not the intended focal point, and now I really wish I hadn't included it. I know it was wrong, to not use a condom, I know why, I carried condoms with me every where I went for the last 5 months, but, having decided I would probably not get laid, did not carry them this particular night. It is unfortunate, I think that with all of the energy that we exert going to war over oil, that we cant drop a couple of those bux into some genuine high financed viral research and go ahead and wipe out aids and other std's but the truth is I dont think they really want to, I think they (the powers that be see it as a great way to punish the immoral (thatd be us). sad but true. they also see it as great population control. but the whole point of this post was nothing to do with condoms or the need to where them or anything like that. I am not so down, I was feeling quite good about myself until she didn't call, kind of thing I guess the post was more about the frustration of cheap sex. Another thing that frustrates is how girls will string you along at the club and for hours afterwords before sex untill your so drunk and exhasted that the sex sucks. one of the best reasons I think to be in a relationship is so you can have sex without having to be drunk or exhasted. and also so that you can have enough sex with out having to go at it for 8 hours at a time cuz you dont know when your going to get it again. I am not going to speak of anybody in particular or point any fingers etc, but have you ever had sex w/o condom when you probably should have used the condom? if the answer is no, it is a true fact of life that it happens. there were whole other parts of this story that didnt make it in and that condom part did and the most frustrating thing is that the parts that didnt make it in were as important.
you two are both my friends, I wish I could have articulated this moment of my life clearer, I needed to hear something from somebody/anybody, and the condom soapbox wasnt it. but sincerely thank you for caring. I know yall do and for that you have my warmest aloha, and my deepest mahalo.
11/10/2005 9:49 pm
Oh, and I tried to drop into Love doctors but the uplink is too slow, all I can do is blog, and email, (its like a 12 k uplink) |
thanks again for the health concerns.
11/11/2005 1:47 am
I'm not sure I know how to put my thoughts into words here, so please stick with me if I start to ramble. |
I already read your post about you being loved, complete, beautiful and happy despite the world and I applaud you for it. I am hoping that your encounter with this girl was part of the realization that sparked the happiness post. It is easy to base what we think and know about ourselves on our experiences with other people, but that can be so easily manipulated. I'm sorry for your loneliness and for the fact that the experience was deep enough for it to make you hurt when it didn't turn out right.
Happiness is your own, something that you decide on your own terms, so hold tight to that conviction that you are good enough, strong enough and deserve to be happy. You are loved by many here...don't forget that.
p.s. And they yell because they care
11/11/2005 3:51 am
*snuggles sharks* I know the condom part wasn't it, darlin' but it just jumped out at me.|
As for the no condom thing, I made that mistake when I was younger and stupider, and it gave me a lot of heartache later (thank heaven I didn't catch anything).
I've never had sex when drunk, I don't enjoy alcohol that much but I have had drunken partners and it never quit works out like it should. It feels like he's not all there and that's not something I like. I'm all here, why aren't you?
I have had sex with the wrong person for pretty much the same reason you did, I needed human contact. Let's just say it was, well, better than nothing at the time.
Why do women string you along at clubs? To make you buy them more drinks, most likely. Also, if they leave with you before closing time they might get branded a "slut" because they "didn't take time to know you better". Puh-LEEZE, how well can you know someone in three or four hours? Might as well be honest with yourself and the other person, let them know it's a one-off thing and go enjoy yourselves while you're still able to.
Oh, and, sharks... the promise I made you way back when still stands.
11/11/2005 9:58 am
Sharks I know the main thinng about the condom wasn't the main point. I just had a friend hit me hard with the fact that he infected his current gf with herpes. It really hit me over the head. I will address this other poing though while I am here since I am now over my panic (for lack of a better word) I know what you mean. I have fund in the few yrs I have been on AdultFriendFinder that can ejoy sex with a friend that at the very least we also have something to talk about. yanno? I have had very few one night stands but the ones that I have had actually turn out not to be one night stands after all. Mostly.....and hugs I know what you were hoping for didn't come to pass, but in time it may. Just try not to focus on it too much and work on other things, like things that you think you need to work on for you. I use to think and dream about the perfect love and how I would no longer be quite so unhappy when I had that love. I have found that I was expecting too much. I have tried to relax my expectations and that seems to have helped not to mention letting guys know what I expect has helped alot. |
Just finding things you enjoy doing for yourself and so on helps keep the lonlines at bay and working on things that you enjoy will give you the satisfaction of self that will help you. I do know how you feel though. hugs Sharks I was just worried about you and already had a friend in trouble. I would hate to have you in his situation.
hugs and kisses