|Blogs > rm_sexypinay16 > Moving Forward...|
Last friday I accepted the biggest dare in my life....few months ago we (my friends)made a crazy deal that I will go with them in strip bar ...hehehhe...if we will able to finish the big project that we are working on. And I foolishly accepted the deal..because I'm...( I feel naughty, curious, and tempted.
Actually it's been such a long time since they asked me to join them in their naughty escapade.I wanted to see what's in there to see beautiful glorious body of men live...( sorry im being silly) I havent been to such places in my whole life, but this time I must admit I wanted to see why they looked different, whenver they go to work during mondays...dreamyeyed...giggling...they looked stupid and their non stop laughter that seems to disturb the whole school. I am curious...lol...and I wanted to see .
I told mom that we will be sleeping over night in a friend's house to finish some papers( lol...bad girl)of course , I wont tell her my secret mission that night or else I might give her an heart attack.
I left the house at 6 am..why early? Because we agreed to go to a Spa and have ourselves pampered by those ladies with magnificent hands that could massage and oiled one's body to perfection. ( Well...I feel so guilty doing these things , when I was supposed to be at home with my kids) . The five of us went to Indulgence Spa...and enjoyed the luxurious taste of being a pampered. The aromatic smell of the place , its serenity , classic and beautiful amenities of the Spa Center really relaxed us.
While lying there and enjoying the feel of those magnificent hands on my tired body, problems were like distant stars.
It felt good to be massaged esp my back.I have this constant backpain that disturbes me at night. I've realized that my head part , back, feet and legs were so tired that I wanted them
to be massaged forever.If only life will be like this. If only I could bring this lady home and hire her to massage me.LOL
All of us were in a spacious room overlooking the man made lake outside. Each of us wore pink robes.We were steamed ...bathed... oiled...we were about to have out body scrub and massaged. All of us enjoyed and felt relieved. Loise and Mae slept while they were being worked on .Yna and Sheena were talking about the strip club that we were planning to visit. ( The naughtiest in the group )and I was giggling a lot while the lady massaged me. I am not used to being touched and massaged esp my feet .( I wanted to shout and laugh whenever she hold my feet and I told her to bear with me.) I felt like a kid...hehehhe..I remember dad when he used to tickle my feet.
For the first time in many months I felt human...and I felt beautiful....esp when I saw my reflection in the mirror the woman looked happy.
I realized that I deserved this after all. I must pamper myself and never mind the little amount of money that I will be spending. Skin , body weight and skin facial were not my problems the lady assigned to me said , just need to take care of them . Problems and pains seemed far from me .I just listened to the music and enjoy the relaxing and soothing effect of the spa.
At 9 pm we were done, revived, relaxed and reborn. The Crazy Friends are now ready to their quest...all beautiful..happy and energetic. So who says we need men to massaged and pamper us? lol..we just need to work hard to be able to pay for that pampering...hehhehe...its pain and sorrow free.
The transformed classic women were born. We will be going to a bar where there stripers.Men stippers. I could almost feel my heart thumping on my ears. When we got inside its noisy ..live bands are playing...people listening to music ..there women..a lot of them..most of them are in their 40 to 50's. Actually my eyes told me we were the youngest. That made us more silly to go here.
God I wanted to go out and I must looked nervous because my Yna asked if I am ok. I told her Im fine though I am so uneasy. We seated in the bar counter.There are men but most of them looked young. Loise stood up tpo talk to the manager and my God she is asking for a man to sit with us.
There stood a young man who was so handsome and young. He was so muscular and tall. He looked like a god in the greek mythologies.
I just thought men were the only one who could do this.I was perspiring.I was nervous.I was
afraid.My 100% confidence dropped to 20 % as soon as we got inside this dark and noisy world. I felt out of place.I was afraid that somebody I know might see me in this kind of place. I suddenly wanted to backout but I cannot ruin their night.
Then as I sipped my margarita and swallow the fear and tension that was in me. When I looked at my friends, they were all looking at me and with their mischievous grins...they are smiling at me. They told me I looked uneasy and nervous and I looked funny. If only knew how afraid I am and embarrased.
The show started men dancing on stage with that silly dance.LOL. I cannot even looked at them.LOL but I must admit they are handsome and gorgeous. But I dont like their dance it cheapens them . They looked desperate to earn money. As they danced slowly to more erotic movements they slowly took away evry piece of their cloth,every muscle,evry part was exposed. Never in my life that I've witnessed a show like this. I could feel my heart in my ears, chest thumping wildly, eyes burning . I wanted to look away but I cannot resist looking at them.
You could hear the " ahs and oh my God" in the audience.I felt so shy yet so tempted, to enjoy every part of their glorious body. I felt burning because I was so embarrased to look and enjoy . I was perspiring.and my silly friends were just there smiling their hearts out and having a good time. We ended up comparing the sizes of those men on stage.I was so uneasy that I dont know where to turn my eyes.
I was not turned on.I was embarrased. I must admit I admired their beauty and gloriuos body. But I was curious of the why of things. Been wondering why they do this. Where do they get all the guts and courage to expose their bodies like this? Do they like it? Do they enjoy the crowd? They were so young. They should be going to some college now.
I just sat there smiling and let my gaze roamed around and saw a 50 year old woman who sat in a corner with a much younger man . She looked so inlove and happy...her eyes only for the man sitted next to her. The young man was also embracing and cuddling her. We asked the young man sitted with us , who was that woman , he told us that she was a rich widow, who was regular costumer in this club.
Then I asked the young man seated in front of me, man which Loise choose to seat with the us. His name was Ron from Angeles City.I asked how old he was.If he was going to school,he told me he was 23, not going to school,a college undergrad.Then Anne asked him if thats his real age and said yes. Then Luisa asked how much the woman in the corner was paying the young man.
He said he was reserved only for that woman because he was already rented for 50K per month.A part of me was shocked.and a part of me goes out to the woman. Why spend that much? Just for a temporary company? Its the pain of getting old and alone I guess or its bec she was inloved? We didnt realized that the dreaded erotic dance was already done.
Ron asked If I am new.My friends told him Ive been to the convent, which left us all laughing.
He also managed to asked where we are working.That
time we denied our work..hehehehe. We told him we are working in a company in Manila. (God must be frownng down on us that time)
But we behaved our selves we just sang, watched with awe and talked to Ron ...he was like a younger brother. He said he didnt want to go to college because life is difficult for him. His family needs his earnings in this club. He was eldest and he sends four of his siblings to school. Good reasons..heroic.
And I suddenly thought of my two sons , I hope someday they wont be forced to d things like this because of financial difficulties. This good young man needs to work like this because of his family.
Then 2 am , I didnt realized that I am no longer shy and embarrased I got used to the erotic images and sexy bodies of those men on stage. The artist in me wanted to draw a beautiful sculptured body of a man. What about the sexual desire? Did they able to woke the animal instinct within me? LOL. YES YES YES (I am bad!!!)
But the desire was not for any of them. Its for someone else....
I am a deep person who sees and feel things in a different way. My sexual desires always go with my emotions.They don't turned me on. I just wanted to paint them and draw them. I admire their abs..legs..evrything. They were like images of my nude paintings at home where most of my subjects were nude men. Nudity amazed me. But exploitation turned me off.
Sex is beautiful so as the nude body of a man or a woman. The wonderful movements of sexual movements lurked in my mind. Yes, its been such a long time since I made love. I've been counting the lonely years in my mind. But I don't have regrets , I am reserving my great sexual passion with someone I love. But I must admit I suddenly miss the hot passion of sex and the reckless abandon of my sexual desires,but not for them.
That night we all got home safe and sound. Happy, revived, noisy, giggling, just like young girls who have been to a naughty modus operandi.
But when I entered the dark lonely halls of our house. And I felt the cold floor on my bare feet. I suddenly felt so lonely again. They have gone home to thier husbands. They could release whatever sexual tension they have now. But me I am alone. I showered,nd put on my night dress and thought of making love . I was on fire. Imust admit. My sexual desires are burning.My body were yearning for a man who don't even love me as a woman. I stood up in my bed . I went to the kitchen to get the half filled bottle of white wine.. I have no choice. I cant sleep...I will drink.
I wanted to make love wildly and passionately.To give all..till it hurts..( whew im blushing) I wanted my hands to move and touch to every inch of my beloved. I wanted my soul and heart to move with each every thrust wildly. I wanted to memorized each fold of skin with my kisses,and feel the burning skin next to mine. I wanted to touch , to explore and to experience the ectasy of reaching for heavens of lovemaking.
most of all I wanted all the love and desire in my heart to be released and forever send shivers to his being. I wanted to see eyes burning with desire as I moved and loved him . I wanted him to reach for the deepest part of my soul's yearning as he moves inside me..And most of all I wanted to be burned, loved, and be part of him forever. I wanted to be owned and surrender the woman in the man who torments my soul. This is one of my sexual fantasy.
To make love wildly where every penetration seems to reach my soul and my heart. I wanted to give all...a burning desire that sometimes keeps me awake at the middle of the night. But sex has hurted me years ago...and it left a serious damaged in my soul but now Im getting over it. I wanted to make love all over again where I could no longer experienced how it will be abused and humuliated and used, I wanted to make love where a man could heal the wounds of my soul and drive away the demons created by my painful past. I wanted to make love till I cry...with so much happiness...I wanted to make love till a man cries and moan for my name wholeheartdly. I wanted to make love the whole night till dawn with a man I truly love. I wanted to make love till I reach for his soul with my hands, my kisses and my body. I wanted to heal him and make him complete as a man . I wanted to make love , to make him beg for more ...
( Whew...thats it...the shy woman suddenly becomes sex starved..hehehhe)
Iam burning with so much passion for someone. Skin so hot, face flushed, I was yearning for a pair of strong arms to love me. I was yearning for a hot body next to mine. But I have no one.
I was crying like a small child for many lonely nights to come. It's easy to find sex...but I'm not looking for just a satisfaction of my carnal desires...I am looking for love....longing for love...the fire inside me seems to burn my heart and soul too...That night I just let my imagination drifted to places where there was no fear of rejection or pain just love, and passion with my prince in my dreamland...
Love..Faith ..and Hope..
11/30/2005 12:54 am
Hi Wood...thanks for reading my crap...LOL. Hope you will enjoy being here in the Phils, there is so much to see and admire here. Enjoy your stay. |
Hello Jim...you're still blushing? LOL. Thanks to your novel ( Tom and Gloria) they woke up the sensual woman within me. hehehehe. Don't worry I am making a big step towards enjoying my youth and life. Thanks ...miss you ..mwah!!!
Love..Faith ..and Hope..
11/29/2005 11:39 pm
Wow...Pinay...you've got ME blushing!|
Very sensual...very sweet...very exciting...
It seems this part of you is 'growing up', as you needed to..
enjoy your youth, sweetie. Enjoy your life...
11/27/2005 4:31 pm
What an incredible story honey! How long did it take you to write? Look what you did to me from only reading it! \8 hehe Please email me at: AdultFriendFinder|
I'm now coming to Balibago this January, to visit one of my good friend's and his family! They live in the Josefaville 2 subdivision, near the Clark Base! I'm REALLY looking forward to meeting you teach!
It's OK to email me here at AdultFriendFinder, if you include your phone #!
See you in January! >>!