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Marriage Contract, Page 1
Marriage Contract, Page 1
This is a true contract give to a woman by her husband. Currently the husband is on trial for kidnapping his own wife. His wife submitted this as evidence against him for the trial.
Of all the things about it, my favorite part is that the title is "Contract of Wifely Duties" and the very last section says "this is not a contract".
Contract of Wifely Expectations
For purposes of clarification
You and any form of it will refer to Mrs. Frey
I and any form of it will refer to Mr. Frey
Hygiene & Self-care
You will shave every third day which includes underarms, chest, legs, and pubic area (navel to anus). All areas are to be completely clean shaven. Above your vaginel slit you may have a patch of pubic hair in any shape, that must be centered above your vaginal slit. It will measure no greater than 2.0" x 1.0" and will maintain a hair length of less than 1/3".
Clothes & Other Apparel
You will wear only thigh highs & garters, and only thong panties. The only exception would be during your menstrual cycle, at which time you could wear either or both. Half of your shoe purchases will be high-heels, 2" or more. You will then wear these high heels more often.
You will give me all non-thong panties and all pantyhose, all tights, all knee-high and/or ankle-high nylons. You will be able to keep 5 pairs of non-thong panties of your choice for use during menstrual cycle.
Sleepwear & Sleeping
When we are at home, and alone as a family, you will be naked within 20 minutes of the kids being in bed, and then sleep naked unless instructed otherwise. If I am not home when the kids go to bed you are still to be naked before I return home. The only exception will be during your menstrual cycle.
When we are not at home, or not alone as a family, you will try to ensure that we sleep together. If we do sleep together you will sleep naked. I will make exceptions for sleepwear, but only if you do not ask for them. Exception will be given based on how well you follow this contract in its entirety. If we do not sleep together your sleepwear much conform to the standards for exceptions.
When exceptions are given the following is acceptable and is your choice: T-shirts, pajama tops, or gowns as long as the over-all length is not past your knees. panties (any type) can be worn also. Absolutely no bottoms, shorts, pajama pants, or full gowns can be worn.
When we are in bed together I can cuddle, spoon, hold or touch you in any way, as long as it does not excessively disruptive to your sleep.
When we are at home and alone as a family from when you are to be naked until 12:00 AM, or for three hours, whichever is later, will be My-Time. This time will be time you will devout solely to me, whereas you will be in my service to do anything and everything I want, which may or may not be sexual in manner.
When we are not at home or not alone as a family, My-Time will be modified as follows: you will have your clothes, you will be able to speak openly, and you won't have to perform anything sexual before we are in bed, however all other rules still apply.
During My-Time you WILL NOT
1) Argue about anything with me or to me.
2) Complain about anything to me or about me.
3) Cry, sob, whine, or pout.
4) Sigh, moan, bulk, or otherwise show displeasure or unhappiness.
5) Raise your voice at or to me.
6) Be condescending to or about me.
7) Ask for anything from me or for me.
Be distracted from me by other things.
During My-Time you WILL
1) Be subservient, submissive, and totally obedient.
2) To do what you are asked, when you are asked, exactly how you are asked.
3) Be cheerful and adoring towards me.
4) Be close at all times, unless otherwise told to.
5) Perform any and all sexual acts, excluding anal penetration and/or ingestion of cum, when told to.
3/31/2006 2:29 pm
The only thing I can say is..........WHATEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!|
6/17/2006 11:18 am
I am the third posting to this hysterical contract...what I find most hysterical is the stupidity of the other two posters! The artist who posted it for our amusement clearly stated that it was an actual contract and that the writer was currently serving time...I don't know for sure, but I believe this was posted for our amusement...not as a insight to the artists personal demands, but rather an insight to the artists sense of humor. To the roofpig: I can only applaud your sense of intelligent humor! Too bad there are so many people that never open the book before they judge it!|