I Blame Science Fiction --- and: Plea for Help  

rm_oregonpoet 39M
3 posts
10/3/2005 1:29 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

I Blame Science Fiction --- and: Plea for Help

I have been a voracious reader all my life, mainly sci-fi and fantasy. It is interesting to note that many sci-fi books have alternative relationship customs. Robert Heinlin alone uses clan marriages, chain marriages, reverse polygamy, polyandry, and more.

Before I even lost my virginity, I had an idea of the ideal relationship: two couples, all four partnered to the others, whether bi or purely heterosexual didn't matter. Of course, it becomes difficult to find that. If you pick up a second couple to add to your relationship, there will always be the feeling of separation between the two couples.

My way, which still has all sorts of problems, would be for one partner in a single couple to date until they found someone who was just about perfect, then bring them home to meet their other (obviously with the knowledge and consent from them). Then, after the three have evolved a deeper relationship, do the same again, but for the other sex.

This way, all parties will have a chance to become friends and lifemates, develop trust and ties. In the event of someone leaving the relationship, there will still be three to support each other emotionally.

Being a man, of course, I tend to envision this with the two women being quite happy with just me and each other, but I have no problem sharing with another man as long as there is trust and friendship between us (See previous life-experience).

My partner knows of my feeling, and we have talked about it from time to time. She has never shown interest in actively seeking anything like this, but she has never said that she dislikes the idea, and we have a fairly open and honest relationship.

Recently we have discussed swinging, and she has looked into information about it, and knows that I am trying to find people to talk to for information, but again, no enthusiasm, but no disgust...just a very toned down mild interest in the background of it.

Now for the plea for help, from those of you who actually made it this far through my cyber-blabble. Is there a couple out there with a strong relationship, willing to meet and talk about the swinger lifestyle, the pros and cons, and how it affects your relationship to each other? I promise that I/we will be discrete. The only parties to know will be my partner (F) and myself (M).

Thanks, and blabble on

tamethytension 54M
2320 posts
10/3/2005 4:15 pm

This is an intersting take on this lifestyle and its development.


CantonOhCouple 60M/60F
553 posts
10/3/2005 6:58 pm

I fondly remember all of Heinlein's writings that included "alternative" life styles. We are a couple that has recently made the decision to take the leap of faith. We can say honestly that it has been a positive, life altering experience.

Best of luck,


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