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Last weeks Blog was a reminder to all you English women out there that porridge is not an aphrodisiac and, although it might warm your man’s stomach on a cold frosty morning, it does very little to either arouse or assuage his sexual appetite. This week’s literary ramble is aimed at the gentlemen in the audience and does, I believe, touch on one of the most potent sexual symbols of all time and it also reveals one of the deeply held (but often hidden) desires of English men.
I mean, don’t you just love cowboys?
“Dawn's light broke across the rocky divide as horse and man moved in smooth cadence. He patrolled the land with a gunslinger's grit defending woman, child and cow from predators and gnarly no-goods. This valiant cowboy of America's Wild West...”
Wow! These guys were men, knew right from wrong and took what they wanted from life. The women of the Old West adored them and many women still do today. But it’s not the cowboy himself that concerns us here…it’s the cowboy boot!
What started me thinking about this particular topic was an e-mail from a friend in New York. Now, I know that the Big Apple is not a ‘western’ state in the sense that Texas or Arizona is, but this e-mail got me thinking about cowboy boots. My friend Lydia knows I have a ‘thing’ about cowboy boots and wrote to inform me that there is now a book out in the States called “The History of the Boot”.
Although ‘bootless’ at the time of writing, one day I will buy a pair of cowboy boots but I feel I need to go to America to do this. Not only will the choice be so much greater but the thought of purchasing a pair of cowboy boots from downtown Leicester (which is a possibility) just doesn't do it for me in the same way that walking the mean streets of America will.
I don't know if this particular quotation is from "The History of the Boot" but it makes wonderful reading all the same.
“The new zenith in cowboy boot artistry has placed us in the eye of the platinum age of boot making. Boot makers and wearers have accepted the challenge to go where no boots have gone before. The cowboy boots offered up now are not only footwear but sculptures in leather, a cornucopia to challenge your imagination, tug at your heartstrings, touch your senses, leave you speechless and gasping for breath, and finally, leave your toes twitching' and your dogs barkin' in exquisite longing for a new pair, a lulu of a pair, a tattoo for the feet and soul of the great events in your life, your dreams, your hopes, your loves, your future, something that would knock your granny down.”
Exactly! What self-respecting, red-blooded Englishman has not wanted to own (and wear) a pair of cowboy boots? Yes, ladies, we too can use foot ware as a source of sexual enticement. Just as there is something about the image of a beautiful women in boots that has a man just dropping to his knees, what woman could resist the sexual allure of a man buck naked save for a pair of cowboy boots and a Stetson? The boots have an effect on the man wearing them too. He becomes more confident and assertive and he develops the ability to make love like a wild mustang.
“Cowboy boots can be a narcotic for the neophyte cowboy wanna-be. Boots from the dawn of high-heeled footwear have always evoked a certain sensual connotation that extends to sexuality. The beauty of cowboy boots is that they are genderless. They can be worn by anyone, with anything, for any occasion–or "with nothing at all" . . . And so this love affair with the "soul" of the American cowboy, forever ingrained in our hearts, continues into the twenty-first century.”
I just couldn't agree more. Whoever wrote this was surely speaking for all of us. And as I cannot possibly surpass the brilliance of the above prose I will bid you adieu.
Your very own Rodeo Cowboy (neophyte),