filipino jokes... :)  

rm_naughty_jean 31F
15 posts
5/21/2005 2:44 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

filipino jokes... :)


i added this up. Add on if u like...
jim's add on:

Outside an etsblishment in pabayo:
FOR RENT: MALE BEDSPACERS

Boyfriend to Girlfriend, may LQ: What do you take
me for?! Granted?

Guard, answering the telephone: Hello?... Ah yes,
for a while. Please
hang
yourself.

Starlet in an interview: If the odds are against me,
then I will against
them.

Inday Badiday asks a starlet about her mother's
burial:
Inday: Kumusta ang libing ng nanay mo?
Starlet: Successful naman po.

Army officer to cadet: "Do you know why I ask you
to stand?" "No, sir."
"Ok, why?" (anlabo!)

Teacher to students: Baka gusto nyong ibilad ko
kayo sa covered courts.

Teacher: Class, I want you to watch sex scenes.
Class: What?! Teacher!
Teacher: What's wrong? It's a beautiful film starring
Bros Welles!
(Bruce
Willis)
Class: Aah, Sixth Sense!

Sa isang examination:
Student: Mam, pwedeng gumamit ng liquid paper?
Teacher: Ang kulit naman! Sinabi nang pad paper
lang eh.

A reporter interviews a politician about the
Philippine economy.
Politician
says: Talagang mahirap ang buhay natin ngayon.
Pero slow by slow, we
will
success.

Teacher: Sorry, class. I'm late. My mother died
three years ago. And now
she's dead. (Ano daw?!)

Heard in a fastfood chain:
Yaya: Ma'm, gusto po ni Mark ng KIDNEY MEAL!

Teacher: What is ur name?
Student: Dell.
Teacher: What is ur old? (maybe she meant how
old are you?)

In a restaurant:
Waiter: Sir, How do you want your egg?
Customer: Side in, side out.

Mom interviews her daughter's suitor:
Mom: What's your course?
Suitor: Geo po (for geology).
Mom: Ahhh... Geo-rnalism. Ok yan. (ok nga!)

Guy to Girl: I love you. This is not a ball.
("Hindi ito
bola" in
English)

Teacher to students: Okay, form two straight
circles and find your
height
alphabetically!

Teacher to students: Okay class, it's time to go
home. Form a line and
pass
out slowly.

Angry teacher to student: I want you to bring your
father and your
mother,
especially your parents, understood?! Bring them
tomorrow in front of
me,
right here, right now!

Emcee, in a party: The next song is the favorite
song of my best friend,
and neither do I!

Posted in an establishment: None ID, nothing
entry.

Teacher: Oy, magdala kayo ng chip ahoy a.
Student: Miss may "s" yon...
Teacher: A, sorry. Chip ahoys!

Two lousy-in-english friends talking to each other:
Friend 1: Am I raining outside?
Friend 2: Not yet. Sprinkle only.

In an awards night, presentor goes: And the winner
for Best Comedy Show
is
Okay Ka, Pare Ko! of IBS channel 13. (Ever heard
of that?)

Alma Moreno, in her show introduces Nora Aunor
who comes in late:
Finally, please welcome, the late Nora Aunor.

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