Dance of Dichotomy A limited view of D/s  

rm_mtnravyn 60M
501 posts
6/8/2006 5:05 am

Last Read:
6/22/2006 2:02 pm

Dance of Dichotomy A limited view of D/s

There have been several blogs recently on this subject and I thought I would toss some of my perspectives into the mix.

Domination is the result of an inner power expressing in the seduction of another of equal power. It takes place on much more than the physical plane. It is a comprehensive, persistent, controlled, thoughtful, sensual, intellectual, and thought-provoking, detailed seduction. It requires a maturity and self-knowledge accompanied by forethought and a high measure of self-control. The Dom negotiates/seduces the sub into focusing her strength, courage, and power into a path of mutual exploration. Because of the strength of both, the reciprocity in a D/s relationship becomes a potentiating cascade of experience for both. It may not be romantic in the classical sense of the word but the depth of feeling between Dom and sub can be exquisite. It is heightened by the interdependence that emerges as the interactions lead to a deeper understanding of the other.

The understanding of the relationship between pain and pleasure is one of the drivers for the strength of what evolves. I believe pain is something that is used very sparingly and pleasure more freely. The pain becomes the touchstone by which the pleasure is measured. It is the contrast, the balancing of strengths, the action and reaction, and the sensual intensity that materializes that enhances the relationship. There is a mis-belief that pain is the essence of the control. That is only true at an immature, superficial physical level. Control is based on the development at a much, much deeper level. The submissive, through her power and strength, is a willing and eager participant in this dance of dichotomies.

One of my favorite aspects of D/s play is the use of the blindfold. To blindfold a submissive is to free her from distractions. She can only hear and taste and feel and smell now; all of her perceptions are routed through these four senses. (There is also a belief that when blindfolded her sixth sense becomes even more activated and it is the connection at this level that heightens the sensuality of the experience for both.) She is able to hear the Master's voice as if it were a whisper in her very ear; she can taste only what He places into her mouth; she can feel only what He gives her to feel, she can smell only those scents he brings into her proximity. Her senses are sharper, more attuned to what the Master is doing; she will strain her hearing to discern a clue as to His whereabouts; she will taste more fully the sweet musk of His cock as it slides between her lips, clings to her tongue and nudges the back of her throat; she will react to His touch with abandonment because she is not distracted by seeing what the He is doing. Her imagination can feed her sensation, and, especially at first, a blindfold allows her one less part of herself which she must control. To use a blindfold is to allow the submissive to concentrate her whole being on her Master- which is the ultimate reflection of her control over him.

shar1 55F
606 posts
6/11/2006 5:42 am

It can be very difficult at times to explain to other's the D/s connection and relationship, you have captured it beautifully here.

As for the blindfold.. as soon as the blindfold is placed on me I am transported to another plane, I know that He is there with me, protecting me, sending me... It's a very powerful tool and my favourite.

impish_pixie 54F
6867 posts
6/16/2006 7:50 pm

The submissive, through her power and strength, is a willing and eager participant in this dance of dichotomies

I wonder why so many have problems understanding this?

I make mistakes, I am out of control & at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~Marilyn

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