A perspective on intimacy.  

rm_mtnravyn 60M
501 posts
9/22/2005 10:27 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

A perspective on intimacy.

I was reading some literature from Native American elder last night and ran across this on relationships:

"During the first year a newly married couple discovers whetehr they can agree with each other and can be happy – if, not they part and look for other partners. If we were to live together and disagree, we should be as foolish as the whites."
Bllack Hawk, a Sauk elder

So no "love at first sight" Relationships are grown into, experienced, with options that allow open communication through out.

I was at a Gathering and one of the elders (who had a PhD in psychology) that he thought the Western culture had created an addiction to romance and all the talk about love and beauty, and attraction were subtle ways to actually avoid the communication that leads to intimacy.

Intimacy takes time. It is a growing together and if it won't grow it cannot be forced. I've done that and it has always been painful.

I believe intimacy may be more about attitude and philosophy of life than about the actual connection. There are certainly levels of intimacy on here that grow over time. There is a deppth of sharing that contributes to that growth. And the lonliness that gets expressed is often a recognition of the shallowness of the majority of the relationships which we are in.

I want to grow more into that attitude.

rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
9/22/2005 12:13 pm

I think that is right, look at all the married people looking for affairs because they are lonely or not satisfied sexually.

Please send me all the cats hugging pictures you have, I cant get enough of them.

rm_mtnravyn 60M
890 posts
9/22/2005 2:52 pm

Lianna You'll get all the ones I can send

rm_FreeLove999 46F
16127 posts
9/23/2005 5:51 am

i agree; part of the reason i could never imagine leaving my husband (in spite of our dire sex life) is because we are really close and intimate in every other way; i can't imagine voluntarily going without that, and nor can he! we have been thru the mill together and have had many problems, but shown ourselves to be more than capable in resolving them in one way or another.

[blog freelove999]

your_gypsy 51F

9/24/2005 6:08 pm

"Intimacy takes time. It is a growing together and if it won't grow it cannot be forced."


have you ever read the road less traveled?

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