|Blogs > rm_maggienme > My Blog|
I've been sitting at this computer keyboard for awhile now trying to write something thoughtful, soulful or inspiring. Problem is I have not been any of those things of late. All I have been is distracted, erected and perspiring. I have only thought about sex....or should I say I have thought about sex only....for a solid week now. (trust me this happens every week)
I am convinced that men have a menstrual cycle of their own. It does not involve the discharge of any unusual body fluids. I doubt that there is any medication for its symptoms other than an hour or two of alone time each day to fish or observe some sporting event, or the chance to be completely selfish in the rack with that special someone. Or... in a perfect world being selfish with that special someone WHILE fishing or observing some sporting event. It does not follow the normal 28-30 day cycle. It can occur anywhere from 21-90 days.For me it is closer to 90 but it catches us quite by suprise, there is no PMS there is only sudden bastard mode. Rarely does it last for more than two or three days unless you are not"gettin' any" in which case it could last until you do get some.(I am convinced this is where many of your schitzoid homeless types begin)
It sounds like bull to say I have been happily married for thirty years (Wow! that even looks wierd in print) but it is true. Perhaps part of what makes our relationship so special now is she understands my need for a wet outlet, just like I understand she will need chocolate to level off during her own cycle. (metaphorically speaking)
Please ladies do not get your bloomers in a knot when I say this but....I think more women need more sex than most women think is neccesary. (God I hope that made sense) Read it again...slower...
You see I have noticed among some of my single male friends that can't get a date (and believe me it is thier own fault) that the longer they go without sex or even some form of intimacy the less attractive they become. They drink more, they shave less, they misplace important shit like deodorant and clean socks. In a nutshell the unsated male eventually stops thinking "I'd like to fuck that" and is just left with "fuck that".
The same holds true for a lot of women. If they don't feel attractive they don't try to be attractive. They will often dress in items of clothing they would not otherwise be caught dead in. They will badly express thier need for compassion or plainly view themselves as undesireable and look at the world through very undesireable eyes. (trust me there is a point to be made ...soon...I hope...I will know when I get there)
OK, for me and my wife, we have come to a very basic understanding. She, actually, can be given the credit for finding a simple way to express an occassionally complicated truth.
"All men are pigs, and all women are manipulative bitches"
Is it any wonder I love her so. Crude but correct in its basic elements. Any man can be, and most guys should be more receptive to thier woman's needs. At least a hug and a kiss, along with an I love you, everyday. A backrub, a foot rub when needed, a show of compassion when she feels like less than the woman you long for. BUT...even if all those things just mentioned are or were to become second nature to the man in question, he is still thinking about knocking the bottom out that thing at his first opportunity. That makes us pigs.
And ladies, the fact that you know all of us are thinking about knocking the bottom out of that thing and will let us (or in some cases make us) go through all of our tender tricks to get to the treasure makes you manipulative bitches.
And so gentle people, if you have come to grips with this truth already...congratulations. It means she never is left wanting for tenderness. It also means that he is never left to hand it to himself...unless he wants to (sometimes we pigs can't help it). Quite frankly my woman enjoys my pleasure almost as much as I do, and me being a pig at heart do not easilt get turned off whence I have been turned on. So on occassion her feeling less than desireable takes a backseat to "our" pleasure. Neither of us has ever regretted a moment of sex.....have you?