When was your first experience with sex?  

rm_lovelyLady 64F
552 posts
4/29/2006 7:05 pm
When was your first experience with sex?


I read about this in one of the groups
It was a long time before I equated orgasms with sex...
The very first time I had sex with a man I was 17, and it was a blind date, and he forced me to have sex. Not only did I not want to do it, I didn't know him, and I said no, and he forced me anyway, and he hurt me. It was actually date . Not a good way to remember the first date with a man and not a good way to remember the first time having sex with a man... So sad that is experienced by many women and girls. I would guess a high percentage of women have experienced Physical abuse and Mental abuse...... I think a lot of women have experienced both... Many have spoken of it in this blog ASK ME HOW I KNOW and also here [post 340157]

Having that abuse happen on my first date left a lot to be desired... Only the first of many disappointing experiences....

Disappointing, Especially since I learned about orgasms on my own when I was 6 or 7. Complete innocence and instinct made for a wonderful sensual Daily orgasms, just me and those wonderful heart pounding feelings.... Experienced through most of my life..... Beautiful, wonderful, sensual orgasms...... I am quite capable of fulfilling the physical needs..... With fulfilling results..... I would rather masturbate for the rest of my life, than live with mental or physical abuse...

Since I learned at an early age about how wonderful orgasms were, it is too bad that we all have such different ideas about how to go about finding compatible partners...

Please don't get me wrong here. I love sex intensely, I am just not interested in casual sex......
So, I guess my point here is (besides the fact that we all enjoy sex) we are all here looking for something different - looking for a partner, looking for a relationship, looking for a soul-mate....
We are all different, looking on this life trail for whatever is next..... lets do it with kindness and thoughtfulness, gentleness....... Many want to jump in and do it now...... and others want to make sure they know who they are getting involved with........ and that takes time........
xoxo LL


After writing the above, I added a post in [post 340157] and am posting it here with some editing

I started to write about this... After reading this blog [post 340157]
that was simply written and answered by so many... I think it deserves re-reading.

But I deleted my blog (there)
because I thought it was too negative‒
I know this is an important issue and little did I know that you wonderful people are all learning and searching for the truth……

This issue of physical and mental abuse ‒ mine - is exactly why I go from being involved here, to thinking I should delete everything and quit this place. •Finding the blogs here has been responsible for a most Amazing and Personal Learning experience...
The reason I have stayed is because of all of you Amazing , Wonderful, Thoughtful, Smart, Caring and Sharing people ‒ and Who could have guessed you could acquire this level of personal growth and find such a fine, special and amazing group of people…….. at an adult sex site?

Good for you papyrina for doing this...... The more people that can talk about their experience,
and I am painfully aware of the world wide epidemic of male and female abuse and ,
the more we can help others to understand how important it is to our mental and physical health….. as the family of man………

I think a huge reason I have trouble with intimacy‒
even though I obviously want a special relationship that includes a healthy desire for sex-
is directly related to having experienced mental and physical abuse and also specifically meeting men with a mental illness.

I came here thinking it was a pretty Wild thing to be doing, but I really thought that I could observe what was going on here and then be able to find the "good guys" out of the sexual predators... And I have found some really special people
•it is obvious who the really Special and Wonderful guys are, through their blogs...

But Still I am hesitant to get involved because of my experiences of past

•Mental abuse - it only happened once ( I actually meant to say - with only one relationship, one man - over a 3 year period), but that was enough for me to say No More

•Physical Abuse -same guy and same answer - it only happened once ( I actually meant to say - with only one relationship, one man - over a 3 year period), but that was enough for me to say No More. I won't tolerate that again.

•and I was twice (one was anal) (the number of times is actually 4… after some soul searching I realized I have been in denial because I had actually blocked out memories…


These experiences were incredibly traumatic at the time, and they changed who I was, then… Thankfully I’m strong enough to put that behind me and still be able to enjoy a high sensual experience

**But I learned the lesson………. and wont let those things happen again…

I guess you could call this baggage, but I call this learning a very important life lesson…

I would rather masturbate alone for the rest of my life…….. than be abused again.

That all being said, I still think it is possible to find a very special relationship, but it is important to know who you are with……. And that takes time…

XOXOXO LL

My Next post about this was 5/10/2006 6: 37 am:

Thank You for the opportunity to get that out, I feel much lighter in spirit, it happened almost immediately after writing this......



This also helped a whole lot......... Gain emotional closure
XOXO LL



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