A Holiday in the Caribbean  

rm_longliner002 50M
166 posts
12/24/2005 5:20 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

A Holiday in the Caribbean


A Holiday in the Caribbean
A woman goes on holiday in the Caribbean, whilst staying at her hotel she meets a big black guy. After a night of mad passion she asked for his name.
He replies: “If I tell you, you will laugh!” The woman promises she won’t laugh, so he says: “My name is SNOW!”
She laughs and says: “My hubby won’t believe me when I tell him had 10 inches of snow every night in the Caribbean!!!”

Various Screw-ups

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine out and lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus-stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling > > the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

An American teenager was in the hospital yesterday recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of her daughters swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say "Your daughter is pregnant." The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon. The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out the window! Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying attention ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the East, and three wise men came. And I was hoping that they would show up again.

Florida Vacation
An Illinois man left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida,
his wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day.
When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email,
unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her email address,
he did his best to type it from memory.
Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an
elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before.
When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor,
let out a piercing scream and fell to the floor in a dead faint, at the sound,
her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen.....
DEAREST WIFE...
JUST GOT CHECKED IN...
EVERYTHING PREPARED FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW...
P.S.
SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE.

Snow
Norman and his blonde wife life in Fargo. One winter morning while listening
to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 3 to 4 inches
of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the
street, so the snowplow can get through". Norman's wife goes out and moves her car.
A week later, while they are eating breakfast, the radio
announcer says, "We are expecting 4 to 5 inches of snow today, you
must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snow-
plow can get through.". So, Norman's wife goes out and moves her car.
The next week they are having breakfast again and the radio announcer
says, "We are expecting 10 -12 inches of snow today, you must
park..." then the electricity goes out. Norman's wife says, "Honey, I
don't know what to do..."
Norman says, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time."

Poem Title: DUST OF LUST...
our eve is set
the sun has taken a western
slant
our eve is set
our body has chosen a supine
position
our mind set
not on lust
it is a yearning for
love long lost
a rejuvenation of our passion
in the intimacy of evening...
in the dust of lust
lies an enduring love
©2005 Adebayo Akinloye

Poem Title: the long kiss goodnight
I wrap my arms around you as you do the same
our lips touch in an endless kiss
the wind blows around us never touching our skin
for we are protected by our love
which blankets us as we stand there
for eternity yet only seconds
because when I'm with you time stands still
and our heart beats unite harmoniously
©2005 kevin Geipel

Poem Title: PASSION FULFILLED (Erotic)
As I am lying here in my bed,
My eyes are filled with tears.
I'm holding you so close to me.
Your hungry lips are devouring mine.
Hands are caressing me all over,
The nectar of my passion is overwhelming,
Making it easy for you to find your way,
Into this wonderland of love.
The rapture we feel as you enter,
This God given palace of mine,
Is so pleasurable, so enticing.
We know that the best, is yet to come.
You've been away for such a long, long time.
Now we're as close as close can be.
I can feel your dear heart pounding.
Our breathing is so fast and heavy.
Rhythmic thrusts grow faster.
We have so much stored up love to share.
Euphoria is reached so soon ---
We speak not a word, you just hold me tight.
I fall asleep in your loving arms,
And sleep for a very long time.
When I awake - no arms are holding me tight,
This memorable erotic night, was just a dream.
©2005 Del Senkbeil

rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
12/24/2005 6:12 pm

Ha the Zimba one is great, I love stuff like that, hes an idiot.


Become a member to create a blog