How am i supposed to feel?  

rm_lkndllsgrl 37F
86 posts
4/19/2005 6:03 pm
How am i supposed to feel?

Well, I got a call today. My husbands sentencing has been moved to Thursday. I am super sad, and I have spent most of my afternoon in tears. It is really happening and I am not ready. I thought that him being in jail locally would make this part a little more bearable, since he is already not sharing my days and nights with me. So far that doesn't seem to be the case. I am scared and I am lonely. I know that he is going to be gone for a long time, and we have talked about me being with other men while he is gone, and we have come to an agreement, no love and no children. Even though I have am sad about all of this, I find myself looking to meet other men. Not for long term commitment, but just casual dating, and ocassional intimacy. I sometimes feel guilty, since his side of the bed is not that cold. And then I think that I have needs too, and it is not my fault he isnt here. So how am I supposed to feel?


Look4FunBahrain 48M/47F
2 posts
4/21/2005 2:21 am

Sorry for the inadvertent and inappropriate wink emoticon. Appearantly a close parathesis followed by a comma gives this result.


Look4FunBahrain 48M/47F
2 posts
4/21/2005 2:17 am

I haven't gone back and looked at the prior posts, so I don't know how long he may be looking at or what for, but at least you are fortunate enough to be with someone who has realistic expectations. If you truly love him as you seem to, honor that agreement and keep your relations casual. As for feeling guilty about doing it, that really can't be avoided but must be dealt with for your own sanity! It may seem odd, but ask him if he would like to hear about your adventures in the 'single's scene'. If he is agreeable, it would give him an excellent way to still feel connected and in a way even intimate with you. It would also serve to reassure him that you are not becoming attatched to another man. Finally, if he can learn to enjoy it, it would allow you (justifiably) to feel that you are not only doing this just for you, but in a manner for him as well. As for when to begin ('his side of the bed is not that cold') it is a personal decision, but here is my advice. Imagine if (God forbid) instead of going to prison, your husband had passed away. Based on your level of sexual needs, and everyone is different, what would you consider a reasonable grieving period? I know this is an occasionally unbearable situation but I wish you the best of all possible outcomes. Good luck and continue venting here. It is a very healthy outlet for you!

rm_NS_76 41

4/20/2005 6:43 pm




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