People have asked me ...  

rm_kelli4u2dew 41F
7027 posts
5/2/2006 10:14 pm

Last Read:
5/11/2006 5:56 am

People have asked me ...

Over the last week, several people have asked me why I'm here. They are referring to the blog I posted about abuse. The inference is that after going through that, I should be turned off by sex and men.

But if you look through the comments, both on my post and MzHuny's, and all the threads that ran from them, you find that there are a lot of people on here that have been abused in one way or another.

Are we all so desperate for love that we are like moths, drawn to a flame that will destroy us? Or are we in denial, and think we'll strike it lucky next time?

I've tried to explain to people, after a lot of thought, why I am here. Of course, originally I came here looking for a date. And despite all the chaff, and having a big ass, I managed to find a few.

I suppose that I could blog elsewhere. It's kinda addictive (I know that's a revelation no one else has had). But there are some things here that I haven't found elsewhere.

First, and definitely foremost, this site has a lot of women who are not ashamed of their sexuality. They openly proclaim that sex is a good thing, and that they have no problem going to bed with someone they are not "in love" with. They acknowledge that sex, with its cuddling, intimacy, kisses, giggles, and other pleasures, is a basic human need.

Thank god! There are times in my life when I wondered if I was the only one who is sane.

Here in blogland, there are an incredibe number of smart people. I like smart people. I can talk to them, learn from them, joke with them, discuss things with them, cry with them. I get tired of having to explain simple things to people who have no hope of understanding what I'm talking about.

There are people here who are people people. You know what I'm talking about? They care about people. They will reach out to a total stranger, just because they believe in humanity and kindness. Mean people suck. If there is a heaven, there is a special place there for kind people.

But here on earth, I'll hang out with you as long as you'll have me.


tillerbabe 55F

5/2/2006 10:52 pm

Sweetie....I'll "have" you! Really tho' I am very happy you found a home here. It's a very kewl place!!! Pssst! I find that Gold Bond works realy well for chaffing!!!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/2/2006 11:27 pm:
Twisted sense of humor ...

waerlookin4fun 50M/46F

5/2/2006 10:55 pm

I've read your blogs and you're a beautiful person. I love to chat and joke with other people.....and by the way you don't have a big ass and I know a lot of people on here would agree with me. Keep blogging and know we'll all read them!!!!!!!!!

Nightguy_1961 55M
4866 posts
5/2/2006 11:48 pm


I have enjoyed reading your blogs, exchanging emails, and chatting when we could. I have to be honest...I wish I were a few years younger, but that's a dream for a different night.

And I don't know where you get off saying that you have a big ass...I think that you are proportioned just right...a total package if I've ever seen cut it out...okay?

Nothing but the best for you, dear lady....

NG61...fading back into the shadows...

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/3/2006 9:37 am:
LOL! Don't like us young chickies? You know, my bf is older than you are ...

SirluvsStorms 46M
684 posts
5/3/2006 1:36 am

Yep To share ones thoughts is an intimate act all by its self. It can be more intimate then sex. Yes the act of sex can be intimate but the sharing of a piece of ones soul is far more intimate. Thank you for sharing. Yep agree with MzHunyhole, No one else should be in charge but you.

Babel__Fish 45F

5/3/2006 1:58 am

*HUGS* You have every right to be here then anyone else sweetie.


redrobin012057 59F

5/3/2006 2:16 am

Ms Kelli,as unknown blogger here,not that I search people out,its just that I am compelled to a few blogs that take my interest namely yours Mz huny and Kofla's blog.But there are so many that I haven't read but you strike me as a powerful woman who knows what she wants and so brave.
*Hugs* lil sister.


papyrina 51F
21133 posts
5/3/2006 3:18 am

we all think out bottoms are big,i know mine is

I'm glad your here and happiyl read you .

I'm a

i'm here to stay

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/3/2006 6:14 am:
Someone who understands me!

reverend21 49M
1913 posts
5/3/2006 3:19 am

you can't surrender to fear, you have to keep going, the reward is worth the risk, and i think we will always be glad to have you amoung us

sassybelle21 32F
13313 posts
5/3/2006 3:31 am

Kelli we are all here for our own reasons. If it wasn't for AdultFriendFinder, I wouldn't have met my German lover. He will always be the greatest man in my heart. I do love him although we are not in a relationship due to the distance which we don't want to deal with. Thank you for being a friend to me though I might not be the smartest or a people person.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/3/2006 6:15 am:
Well, I'm definitely not the smartest, sis. I'm just hoping some of it will rub off.

hereforyou6217 43M
912 posts
5/3/2006 4:25 am

Kelli, I don't think I've ever read a blog entry that so succinctly and accurately expresses why I'm here, too. You're right-- many of us are "people people", just happy to make connections, whether sexual, friendly, or otherwise, with other like-minded people.

And MzHuny-- not ALL of us men think that. Some of us are JUST fine with beautiful women like yourself and Kelli expressing your sexuality here. We're not all judgmental assholes. Right, guys?

(oh, and your ass? Unbelievable.)

Cowboy_Deluxe 38M

5/3/2006 4:59 am

I'm in denial, you don't have a big ass.. That is just silly. You have a big character, I'll go for that.

fantasylover_05 62M

5/3/2006 5:00 am



You are one of the "smart people" of whom you speak!! You have tremendous insight and obviously care despite the horrors that have been thrust upon you and you have not only endured but have become one very strong woman!!!

You are definitely one of the "sane ones"!!!

We all here in Blogland are VERY FORTUNATE to have a beauty like you here and to get a chance to know you as well!!

Just a couple more things....


And.... blogging is addictive? NOOOOOO... couldn't be!!! LOL LOL

Thank you Sweet Kelli!!

TrapsTomesSteed 42M
202 posts
5/3/2006 6:30 am

Amen, Kelli. Well said(as usual).

rm_macallan4u 46M
968 posts
5/3/2006 7:00 am

And we will hang out as long as you will have us.

PS Big ass? At least that's proof that you're not a man pretending to be a woman! LOL!!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/3/2006 9:43 am:
I've seen men with big asses ... ???

caressmewell 53F

5/3/2006 7:08 am

I'm glad your here are a breath of fresh air for me and I am so glad that we have become friends.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/3/2006 9:42 am:
You are one of the very special people.

DLiscious2 48M/42F

5/3/2006 7:48 am

We would hang out with you here or anywhere. And what are you talking about, "big ass"? Ahem. Frickin' GORGEOUS ass is what we say.

Also, you are right: There are fabulous people here. Sexy, open, generous, unafraid...we've blogged with them, chatted with them, slept with them and have the utmost respect and gratitude. It is a blessing to know that we are not alone.

Although we have not met (but hope to) we count you a friend.

sillyperv 54M

5/3/2006 8:15 am

I imagine that the majourity of people asking why you are on this site are men. In this day and age a beautiful, sexual woman is still an intimidating presence for many men. Some deal with it by aggression, some by whimpering, some with witty, cutting brilliance (ahem! cough!!). You know, I've said this before, but the only time you have you justify yourself is when you're found with a dripping red butcher knife in your hand while standing over a heavily puntured body -- oh, and when you eat the last piece of chocolate cake.

Big butt?? Puuuhhhlease!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/3/2006 9:41 am:
I find it interesting that everyone assumes the people asking me why I'm here is male ... they were all female, some are people I feel rather close to. It wasn't judgemental, but curious.

phangasm2003 105M

5/3/2006 10:14 am

I've said it before and I'll say it again, people would be a whole lot happier if they didn't get sex and love confused so much.
I write because I can't NOT write. It doesn't matter whether it's good or relevant or whatever, it's just something I need to do. I don't think I'm alone in that sentiment.

SlowPlayin 50M

5/3/2006 10:29 am

Are we all so desperate for love that we are like moths, drawn to a flame that will destroy us? Or are we in denial, and think we'll strike it lucky next time?

I thought that was an interesting statement, Kelli ... after reading your thread about the abuse that you went through it's easy to see why you would have that perspective ... I've had similar thoughts too and I haven't been through anything like what you have been through.

Sometimes I think that the more a person becomes comfortable and happy being by themselves the better chance there is to find love. This might sound strange but I've gotten to the point where I would be surprised if I were ever in a relationship that was forever ... not because I wouldn't want it to be but because maybe that's just the way life is ... I don't know, everything is constantly evolving so the sooner we realize it's about the journey, not the destination the better off we'll be.

Personally, I don't care why you're here ... just glad you ARE here ... I've thoroughly enjoyed reading the threads in your blog and you putting up with my comments ... so, thank you ... btw, I think your ass is PHat.

sexyariesgirl 57F

5/3/2006 10:55 am

Kelli - I am new to the blogs and have just finished reading your post about the abuse you suffered. You are indeed a very brave, strong woman. I'm glad you chose to share with us here. In my opinion, it's the best thing about the blogs - sharing our pain, hurt, laughter, joy, silliness, OURSELVES with others. And yes, I'm a people person too - always have been. Was actually a PEOPLE PLEASER for many years - to my own detriment, but I'm working on that! AdultFriendFinder has shown me that taking care of ME is just as important. Thanks for sharing...and big HUGS to you! I'm glad you're here.

Power To FOK

sickofthegames 41M
33 posts
5/3/2006 11:51 am

There are those people that understand, those that make an effort to try to understand and then there are those whose synaptical patterns cannot allow them ever reach a potential for it is not in them. Usually it is the latter of these that will spout off ramblings advertising how greatly ignorant they truly are. This to me is sad for rather than enjoying life through hard work and good rewards they are mere sponges migrating no further than their arms can reach. You, dear Kelli are by far not one of these people, having read your blogs I can discern your strength zest for life that you have. I like all the other people that read your blog are very fortunate that you choose to share your thoughts, from those of being swamped with mismatched profiles to the present.
From what I see your posterior looks fabulous. It could be part of my culture as to what I think is physically attractive about the female form but I think yours looks every bit proportionately perfect. My thinking is very simply I like a woman to look like woman not a boy... that's simply wrong. I won't say that a more uptodate viewing of this said part wouldn't hurt at in the least bit either

rm_FreeLove999 46F
16127 posts
5/3/2006 12:37 pm

well, i totally understand why you are here... it was on my to do list to write about the freedom of being able to express your sexuality in a community here like no other i've ever experienced ... o well, it's difficult for me to write about sexuality at the moment when i'm pregnant and not getting any, so i'm glad you picked up the ball!

[blog freelove999]

RevJoseyWales 69M/66F
14393 posts
5/3/2006 2:07 pm

And then ther's me.
Oh hell, Kelli, if you'd have me.......
I've never been physically abused. Guess I wasn't cute enough. I'll never forgive Father Murphy. But emotional abuse? Yeah, just a bit you might say. There's more about that back down the clamshell at my place.
Personally, I'm just glad YOU let me hang out once in awhile.
Uncle Joe (damn I'm proud of that)

"McVeigh had the right idea, wrong address."

"This ain't Dodge City, and you ain't Bill Hickok."

MaggiesWishes 59F

5/3/2006 2:46 pm

I've got just the hammock to swing in and the Mint Julep's are chillin and we can choose our pick in the Derby this weekend!

You know my thoughts, sweet lady.
I send you warm wishes & huggies

VenusDiaries 62M
867 posts
5/3/2006 2:53 pm

It is fun hangin with smart people like you. It is a pefect fine ass. I appreciate your honesty.

Wordsmith2004 36M
7233 posts
5/3/2006 4:26 pm

"It's kinda addictive (I know that's a revelation no one else has had). "

No really?

Solid sarcasm manuever there ma'am, very professonal but I'm going to have to deduct a point or two for leaving me an opening to retort tisk tisk...and you had such promise and form in the sport of sarcasm

Seriously serious, I completely agree, we need every horny lil'devil and devilette in the world (that's not a psycho hose beast ) to get on a site like this so this could be a purrrfect community of posh perverts.

Gracias for sharing!

Conserve Water and Prevent Global Warming: Shower With A MILF!

jd29992z 54M
3888 posts
5/3/2006 8:03 pm

Hang out as long as you want babe. Some time bad thing happen to good people just a fact but sometimes good thing happen to good people that is way we are here for the good!!!!!! Hang in there you always have a shoulder to rcy on, a hand to high five, or arms to hug. See you, be strong and blog on babe!!!! JD

out_for_a_ride 35M

5/3/2006 11:20 pm

at this point i've totally changed my motivations for being a member. it used to be for finding a date, and while i care little of the outcome anymore, but now it's simply for the blogs. specifically for what you point out in this blog....this is a great community to express your mind in. while i don't write my blogs here on hotmatch, i check them daily in search of the few where i feel my words are best served. for this reason, your post is a great spot today because (as with most days) i was extremely discouraged by the way people behave toward one another. witnessing again how selfishly motivated we can all be, and yet how some show no effort to avert self-centered tendencies. however, then i log into hotmatch, read through a couple blogs and find the few that provoke serious thought (like this one) or have an outcry of support (also like this one) and the world is not so bad again. as i'm sure it worked for you, to log on and see all the support for you here. so this comment is for all the preceding arms of support, kudos for holding your girl up and showing her love...she's not the only one who apprectiates it!

TabithaElectra79 37F

5/4/2006 2:05 am

This is one amazing place!

fmisvme 46M/36F

5/4/2006 7:51 am

Self depreciation can be cute, but don't be ridiculous, the derriere is gorgeous. Miss C is strong in both body & mind and loves sex (we both do), nothing about her is "slutty". You appear to have many of the same traits, this is a great place for a person like yourself to vent, muse & generally have fun. You don't need to explain why you're here, those with intellect already know why! Have a great Thursday!

Rock Chalk Jayhawk!

rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
5/4/2006 2:41 pm

It sounds like you are about ready to hang out your "I'm only here for the blogs" shingle in your profile, if you haven't already. It's comfortable here. You can say what you want, openly and honestly and the majority of the other bloggers will understand. You can't beat that.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/4/2006 5:00 pm:
I did that some time ago. Not that I'm not open to the right kind of proposition from the right person ...

Something that blogging doesn't cure is the fact that I'm horny as hell!

carebearluv2 41F

5/4/2006 9:28 pm

Kelli...I am really glad to have you here. I would be interested in being chat friends if you do that sort of thing. I can't email you as a standard member but if you are interested in being chat friends, please email me.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/4/2006 10:43 pm:
Check your email.

rm_1hotwahine 62F
21091 posts
5/5/2006 1:07 am

Yeah, on all of it. PLUS...for the most part the open-mindedness seems to extend beyond sex - people here seem to have pretty much a live and let live attend that extends to all aspects of life. Even the occasional political hot button exchange is more open than generally is "out there."

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/5/2006 6:53 am:
More thoughtful. Sex, politics, and religion. The three "taboo" topics. If people are willing to give the other person their beliefs, even if they disagree, then the discussions don't get heated.

rm1973 43M

5/6/2006 1:08 pm

I don't think anyone should ask why they are on here - we all have our reasons, but its noone's business! Of course, we all came here cause of the sexual edge this site has, but I think a lot stay on here for other reasons beyond that. And just because of what happened in your past doesn't mean you should now only look for men at the Friday night chess club challenge either!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/6/2006 10:56 pm:
Friday night chess club? Men? Damn! I hadn't thought of that ... Bet there's some smart ones, too ...

Exceller22 55M
119 posts
5/6/2006 7:46 pm

That was a very moving letter. This is my first visit to your site but I will definately be back. If you were closer to me, I would ask you to rest your head on my shoulder and just be...

BTW, I like your ass!!

Hang in there, girl

RoyalPurpleRose 51F

5/6/2006 8:58 pm

AMEN Sista!!! Great post. I agree with MzHuny too. I am totally awed by strong and sweet women such as you and MzHuny. I am so glad you are here. Coming back to read more of your blog later.

~Kisses, RPR

HBowt2 58F

5/7/2006 1:17 am

Thank you for this post....yes you are is good to be here with people who understand what we say when we say it.....most of the time no explanations are needed ...they are on the same page...

and as for being abused and being on here....if we were'nt then the bastards would have won....

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/7/2006 4:25 pm:
Yes, definitely the same wavelength.

rm_kneel_be4me 48M
457 posts
5/7/2006 5:52 pm

I'm sorry you had to go through all of that... I am glad you made it through it and now are strong enough to overcome it. You have learned alot from your past and I hope you apply that to your future.

Oh and great ass
Here ~D~

JuicyBBW1001 54F

5/11/2006 5:52 am

thanks for your abuse story gave me courage to get somethings off my chest too.


rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/11/2006 6:09 am:
I'm glad you're healing. It seems that more and more of us are telling our stories. I hope that, maybe, it will prevent such things from happening to others. Hugs.

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