|Blogs > rm_kcronin > Emotionally Fucked|
Bad couple of months...
Bad couple of months...
How many times must I be in the same position of feeling like I've lost everything. I was in a marriage for 12 years (Shelley), but we drifted apart. I have a much more free-spirited way of looking at things and she didn't. Oh well, we're still great friends. However, shortly after I ended up in a committed relationship with a girl from CA (Martha). I fell in love, but she changed and after 7 months, I said goodbye. It hurt a LOT, I still love her. Immediately following our breakup, I dated a local girl here (Amy). After a short while, I found myself falling in love HARD for her. I really thought this girl matched me more than anyone before. Well, after about 6 weeks, she broke it off. That was 3 weeks ago and I'm still hurting BAD from it. Now for the last 2-3 months I was talking to another girl (Celeste), whom I developed a close friendship with. She was great. We had everything in common. I loved her (as a friend). However, after my second breakup, she asked to meet me, so we did. We hit it off immediately. We ended up having sex and within a week she told me she was falling in love with me. Well, I couldn't say that because I am still deeply in love with Amy. Well, she was ok with me not feeling the same. We looked at it as friends with benefits. So she continued to date. Well yesterday she was supposed to come over to spend time with me and stay the night. She promised me that she wouldn't cancel. At the last minute she cancelled and told me that her and one of the guys she was seeing had a talk on Friday and they are now boyfriend/girlfriend. Well, it hit me hard and I was hurt all over again. I felt like I did when I lost Martha and Amy. But I never expected to feel this for Celeste. I concluded that I had been starting to fall in love with Celeste too.
Ugh - All this hurt. I am so tired of feeling like someone has taken a sledgehammer and smashed it right through my chest and heart. I've decided to stop all communications with each of these girls and worry about my life and just have fun without any relationship/friendships for a while.
Sorry to ramble on, had to get it off my chest.
11/16/2005 8:06 am
Thank you for reading my long, drawn out explanation of my life for the past two months. I hope it didn't put you to sleep too often while reading...lol|
Anyway, I appreciate your comment. That's exactly what I am going to do and I'm sticking to it. It's nice to know that when you put something out here, especially something so personal, that someone reads it and has something to say about it.
Again, thank you!
11/18/2005 7:36 pm
Hi, welcome to blog!|
Are you aware there is a new group created for bloggers and their readership to meet and frolic in the chat room? (A place for serious discussion as well)
A group where interesting blog posts will be “spot-lighted” along with the links of how to get there. A place where new kids on the block can actually get seen as well as the predominant “hierarchy”.
A place where ideas can flow--from suggested blog topics, to writing "critiques", to directions on how to better use the elements of color, photos, and font style/size to make your blog more eye appealing; as well as instructions on how to better use linking to other posts.
Being that this is an adult site, we will also have a group post running where writers and their followers can indicate where they're from so maybe you might actually be able to meet some folk "local" to you.
Flirtatious banter is encouraged--crude obscene assaults will not be tolerated and are subject to deletion.
So...Stop in and have a little fun over your cup o' joe!
Here is a link to the group Blog Cafe, look forward to meeting you there!