The Philosophy of the Open Hand  

rm_iwannatellu 45F
849 posts
8/22/2006 11:14 am

Last Read:
8/31/2006 12:47 pm

The Philosophy of the Open Hand

Have you ever heard that you can trap a monkey with a closed cage and a piece of fruit? The illustration is somewhat over-simplified, but perfectly illustrates the philosophy of the Philosophy of the Open Hand. Let me explain.

If you put a delicious piece of fruit, such a banana, or a melon inside a cage with bars just wide enough for a monkey to slip his hand between to reach the fruit, he will grab it, and try to get it out. However, he will not be able to, as he will not let the fruit go to get his hand out of the cage. Thus, he finds himself on the horns of a dilemma. If he lets go, he does not have the fruit, but if he does not let go, cannot be free. Poor little monkey, torn between freedom and greed.

Perhaps another illustration from another angle will help to make the point.

Consider that your life is like a glass filled with water. The glass represents your ability to give, receive, and hold "stuff" (money, love, ideas, time, kind words, and so on), and the water is the "stuff" you have. Of course, the bigger the glass, the more you can hold, but essentially, all humans have a similar-sized glass. (Bitterness can cause your glass to crack and break, but that is another post for another time).

Now, every person is born empty, and every person is taught (to a greater or lesser degree) by their families / environment / surroundings / friends / etc how to give and receive "stuff", and some are better at this process than others. Some seem to have an innate ability to do this, while for others it seems to be more difficult.

While some people also have a gift to make "stuff", there is a caveat. You can only receive "stuff" if there is space in your glass, and you can only make space in your glass if you empty your glass. Guess what? You can only empty your glass by giving "stuff" away to others.

It is really very simple. You can only have someone pour something into your glass if it has space, and there will only be space if you have poured some of your own out into someone else's - by giving something away.

Here is my challenge to Blogville: Catch someone doing something right today, not only in Blogville, but in RL too. See what a difference smiling at someone can make. Seems silly, but it's true. Another side effect is that you may even feel better about yourself...


silverballs2006 51M
40 posts
8/22/2006 11:57 am

i aways smile at folk and it works they smile back it helps in my work


SingleWarrior 52M

8/22/2006 8:08 pm

At my work, they have something called a "Coach Card". It's to be used to "notify" someone of something they did (or didn't do). Management wants us to use them to "correct" people. However, we revolted against that.

To us, the atmosphere is already too negative from management. On the Coach Cards is also entries for COMPLIMENTS, aka doing a GOOD job.

We use that instead

Makes Management mad, but oh well.


SingleWarrior 52M

8/22/2006 8:10 pm

Oh yeah... back to that monkey/fruit/cage thing... did ya know you can apply that to a man/woman/tight pants too?


rm_Benkai7 55M
2358 posts
8/22/2006 11:23 pm

Dear "iwannatellu".

... You are very right ... no one can get anything with a closed hand ... a "closed hand" is to hold, to grab something ... both is a possible metaphorical picture of "possessing" ... a lot of humans "forget" about or aren´t aware of ...

... no one is able to pet anyone or anything with a closed hand ...

Benkai7


Dustywidgettoo 60M

8/23/2006 1:26 pm

I'm here. Send me an invite J and come to me


DIVISION77 39M  
8321 posts
8/23/2006 11:26 pm

ahh...if life were only that simple.

I think South African pale girls need to spend more time avoiding the summer sun and less time maneauvering furry monkeys in to metaphorical musings.

hmmm?

DIV

"My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur


toothysmile 50M
16515 posts
8/24/2006 7:29 pm

i agree with you, it is vital for any society that people interact with each other in a positive way.
in blogville, such cases abound. wants2cyber's post about saying something nice is just a recent example.
great post. kisses.


meetmesoon20066 41M

8/25/2006 12:00 am

This is beautiful.


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:09 pm

    Quoting silverballs2006:
    i aways smile at folk and it works they smile back it helps in my work
5'll get you 10 every time - people can't help smiling back.



xxx


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:30 pm

    Quoting SingleWarrior:
    At my work, they have something called a "Coach Card". It's to be used to "notify" someone of something they did (or didn't do). Management wants us to use them to "correct" people. However, we revolted against that.

    To us, the atmosphere is already too negative from management. On the Coach Cards is also entries for COMPLIMENTS, aka doing a GOOD job.

    We use that instead

    Makes Management mad, but oh well.
Management can be soooo stupid.

Show me how you measure people, and I will show you how people perform. It is a fundemental thing management doesn't seem to understand.

Also, why don't they understand that if you affirm positive behaviour you will get more?!?

SIGH

xxx


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:35 pm

    Quoting rm_Benkai7:
    Dear "iwannatellu".

    ... You are very right ... no one can get anything with a closed hand ... a "closed hand" is to hold, to grab something ... both is a possible metaphorical picture of "possessing" ... a lot of humans "forget" about or aren´t aware of ...

    ... no one is able to pet anyone or anything with a closed hand ...

    Benkai7
Hi Sensei

I like that image - Metaphorically, you can't pet (or love) with a closed hand.

I like that. I like that a lot.

Thanks
xxx


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:37 pm

    Quoting TakethemoneyRUN:
    I'm not stoned or drunk today.
    Not much at least.
    I'm even protesting:

    [post 479367]
no pimping allowed!


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:43 pm

Thanks Foto

Demonstrates the point very well.


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:57 pm

    Quoting DIVISION77:
    ahh...if life were only that simple.

    I think South African pale girls need to spend more time avoiding the summer sun and less time maneauvering furry monkeys in to metaphorical musings.

    hmmm?

    DIV
DIV

Thanks for visiting. Wanna avoid the sun with me? It is nearly summer here.

xxx


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 12:59 pm

    Quoting toothysmile:
    i agree with you, it is vital for any society that people interact with each other in a positive way.
    in blogville, such cases abound. wants2cyber's post about saying something nice is just a recent example.
    great post. kisses.

Thanks.

*Swoons at the thought of kisseS*

xxx


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/25/2006 1:00 pm

Thank you very much.

And thanks for visiting my blog.

Iwanna


tenorsaxxman 65M

8/25/2006 7:27 pm

You should read [post 455553]; great minds . . . . . .. and you're a sax player, huh? How awesome. We should keep up with each other. Saxman.

Tenorsaxxman


tenorsaxxman 65M

8/25/2006 7:28 pm

Oh, yeah . . . . one more thing . . ...


Tenorsaxxman


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/26/2006 5:29 am

    Quoting humboldthonni:
    first time to your blog and i am glad i stopped by....

    Raising my kids, I learned early to catch them at being good...tell them often...and the results were terrific

    so simple, so easy

    I liked this post.
Thanks.

I think Moms have a lot of the answers, and are very wise in a lot of things. You clearly understand the value of positive reinforcement, as you have lived it. If only management could see this.

Thanks for stopping by.

Hugs


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/26/2006 5:41 am

    Quoting tenorsaxxman:
    You should read [post 455553]; great minds . . . . . .. and you're a sax player, huh? How awesome. We should keep up with each other. Saxman.
Hi

I am glad to see that you play Tenor. I believe that it is the "real" sax of them all. I guess it's true - great minds on more than one level.

I have you on my blog watch list.

Thanks for stopping by.

xxx


buxomlady69 52F

8/27/2006 11:44 pm

Just had to say great blog, so simple yet so true, hope someone makes YOU smile today.

Carpe Diem..an unexamined life is not worth living


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/28/2006 8:55 am

    Quoting buxomlady69:
    Just had to say great blog, so simple yet so true, hope someone makes YOU smile today.
I really appreciate that!

You just did.

Thanks for the visit.


dustywidgetonly 59M

8/31/2006 7:04 am

So why stop at one?


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/31/2006 12:47 pm

That is an excellent point.

I just find that for some, they are not necessrily in practise enough to do more than one a day at first...

Welcome back...


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