fathers day.....  

rm_gorilla062 50M
163 posts
6/15/2006 10:14 am

Last Read:
6/16/2006 12:37 pm

fathers day.....

Fathers day is just days away, and while my heart swells with the pride that I am a father to a beautiful daughter.... it also aches knowing that I cannot enjoy a day with her for it.... I am not sure if she knows I am alive.
Many of you have read things in my blog relating to this subject. Some may relate to my pain. I recently had a discussion with someone that had lost a father and she cannot have children... she has difficulty understanding why it hurts me so much.
Imagine having someone close to you... even a best friend; alive but taken from you so that you have no idea how that person is... now imagine it was your own parent or child! Every year I feel as if a portion of my heart gets ripped from my body when I get to fathers day... she is the only thing that keeps me alive many days but I do not her.... I have not been there for her growth, I have not been there to influence her. I only have memories and some pictures from a time of sweet innocence when she aws but a toddler.
Am I wrong to feel this way! Should I be judged for feeling this way? I thnk not... what do you all think?

cookiequeen1000 53F

6/15/2006 3:53 pm

You're right to feel the way you do. The time will come when she comes looking for you. Until then you'll just have to be patient. Write her letters, date and save them for when she does find you. She'll enjoy reading them and learning that you've been thinking about her over the years.

rm_gorilla062 replies on 6/15/2006 4:45 pm:
Thanks doll! I do those things.. as well as buy gifts for her... will save them for the day.
My hope helps to keep me going. Love your heart... it is in the right place!

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