Were art thou my love  

rm_eddie332003 46M
10 posts
8/20/2006 5:34 am

Last Read:
10/8/2006 2:05 pm

Were art thou my love

Here I am a 36 male who has been engaged 3 times and dumped 3 times. I ask myself am I trying to hard?? I have no children and never been married. Been straight my whole life with the exception of having thoughts of sex with a male to see what it is like.(fantasy or curiosity)
Of course I haven't had that opportunity to try it yet.
Not really sure. Maybe its the fustration of not hanging on to a female and keeping her happy.
The last relationship I was in was perfect,or,so I thought.
We were together before for 3 years and because of certain circumstances we split. We lost contact with each other for about 5 years.
Then we got back together(she came looking for me) and of course found each other. Over the next 6-8 months we stayed as friend. We just talked no sex,hugs,kisses,etc.
Soon after that we began dating again. I ask her hand of marraige on Christmas Day. Every thing seemed fine. I did every thing right. I gave her my all. I was fully commited to this relationship. But all of a sudden she dropped the bomb. She wanted to be single and not date.Just go do things that she wanted to do. She didnt want to be in a relationship. She wanted to be single and not have responsibility of a relationship. And I respected that. I didnt have a problem with giving her her space.
Then I found out that after 2 weeks of us breaking up she mets this guy and he moves into her house.
Have I lost faith in women? Am I destined to be single and unwannted for the rest of my life.
I guess men will do the same thing to me.
I am searching at 36 and have no idea were it will lead me. But I'm on a mission to see whats out there for me no matter if its right or if its wrong. Male or Female I feel like I'll get screwed over either which way!!!

rm_PurryKitty2 48M/49F
9753 posts
8/20/2006 5:57 am

Do any of us know what the hell we are doing

Welcome to the blogs ?*

Purry {=}


TnWitchyWoman 56F
6852 posts
8/20/2006 6:04 am

I'm probably a bad one to respond to this but, my opinion is that it's probably not you or anything you're doing. In general most people simply suck and don't think about the emotional harm they can cause other folks when they think only of themselves, are misleading, and downright mean. But you have to take a chance if you want a relationship in your life. Yes, it means getting hurt. Sometimes the hurt is intentional...like your last girlfriend...and sometimes the hurt isn't...like my Dave passing away. But anyone that touches a heart also brings pain either because of their actions or simply because nothing lasts forever. So the decision becomes; is it worth it to keep trying or live a life without loving and/or being loved?

Best of luck to ya!

Hydragenias 56F

8/20/2006 9:47 am

Just wanted to stop by and welcome you to the blogs and invite you over to hydragenias to read, comment, and enjoy.......or even just to say Hi!

bbcuriouskat 39F

8/26/2006 11:39 am

I think that we all are going through some type of pain at any given moment. The important thing becomes living life to the fullest, trying those things we are curious about and wringing every last drop we can out of this life. We only have it once and should not allow ourselves to be hindered by the meanness of others or self righteousness of others. Be who you are and don't fear the pain. Experience it and move on.


9/3/2006 7:38 pm

If I limited myself based on my prior relationships with men, then I'd have to become a lesbian. Instead, I look at them and learn from them. I also see if I have a pattern of picking the same type of person, does the same thing happen in my relationships, do they end the same way, etc... I have hope that one day I'll find a wonderful man to be my equal in a relationship. Somebody who I can call my best friend. I hope you find that someday as well

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