Son's Friend Update  

rm_dragonheat23 51M
977 posts
3/20/2006 8:05 am

Last Read:
3/23/2006 12:24 pm

Son's Friend Update

Rather that post the update with the comments, I decide to add it as a post.
Thank you all for your comments and suggestions.
They helped (me at least) decide how to handle the incident.
We finally got my son’s friend’s mother on the phone. She had no idea of what was going on. She works evenings and her mother is the caretaker while she is away. She was very upset with her mother’s reaction after we explained that the pictures were not your run of the mill Playboy pictures.
She was going to talk to her mother and her son. We suggested a program to limit his internet accessibility, which she thought was a good idea. She said that his use of the internet was to be for school work and “child appropriate” sites. She was thankful for our alerting her to what was going on.
As for our son, we talked to him about what happened. We explained that there are places where people can go to look at pictures like the ones he saw. We explained that they are for adults and that they are not appropriate for a person his age. He asked if we had ever gone to these sites and we explained that yes, we had. We said that an adult can go to these sites and when he or she is old enough, and someday he could too if he wanted to, but for now they were off limits. He agreed.
We thanked him for his honesty and told him that he can talk to us about anything. We promised not to be upset, but to try and listen and help him if we could. He understands that if he does something wrong he may be punished, but that if he wanted to discuss something he could. We told him that we would rather hear about his problem from himself whit honesty than to find out about it later from someone else.
In discussing his “distaste” for the pictures and lesbians, we explained that some people have a sexual orientation which may be different from his. We explained that some people may have different religions or ideas or be different in other ways. This does not make them bad or not worthy of being treated with kindness. We explained that everyone is entitled to do what they want and have their own ideas as long as they do not hurt others. Every one has the right to be who they want to be, just like he has the right to be his own person. He seemed to understand, he asked some very intelligent questions which we answered.
He then went off to play with his Pokemon and be a ten year old.

(What the fuck is this shit..?? *rolls eyes*)

3/20/2006 11:19 am

Thank's glad to hear that all worked out well..Ready


moonfire2u 69F
2602 posts
3/20/2006 4:16 pm

I love happy endings...

kind thoughts,

southrnpeach333 50F

3/20/2006 7:56 pm

Whew, I had worried about this. Thanks for the update. And I must say you handled it very well. I am impressed. I know that your son is too young for this yet, but as one parent to another, when he starts IMing make sure that his setting is to archive his chats. Then go back and check them. I know this sounds like an invasion of privacy but, hey, we only get one chance at them. And he will probably never know.

_Safira 53F
11260 posts
3/21/2006 7:27 am

Well-done, Mom and Dad! Well-done, indeed. *gentle hugs*

This is my blog - Comes With Warning Labels. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

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rm_dragonheat23 51M
1158 posts
3/21/2006 7:35 am

Ready, I’m glad that it worked out well too. It could have been much worse

Moonfire, At least this chapter ended well.

Southrnpeach, Thank you for your support. I hadn’t thought about the IMing thing. I will make sure that I check on that.

aascrompn 42M
6444 posts
3/21/2006 8:08 am

I think that you handled it very well! My ex fiance worked nights and I got stuck w/ her oldest daughter (10 at the time) ask what a blow job was, while she was playing with my friends' children. Wow, that was a difficult question to field, but I handled it correctly and I told her that I was proud of her asking me questions that she was scared to ask her mother...

rm_dragonheat23 51M
1158 posts
3/21/2006 8:38 am

Aascrompn, I agree with you. Kids have questions that as adults we need to answer honestly (appropraite to the age of our audience). If we don't they will keep looking for the answers, sometimes in the wrong places.

angelgrrl 48F

3/21/2006 8:56 am

I am so glad it worked out so well Awesome job parenting!

rm_dragonheat23 replies on 3/22/2006 6:55 am:
Thank you Angel. It's nice to know that I am doing something right.

HBowt2 59F

3/22/2006 1:44 am

so many parents forget to let their kids be kids......they only get one shot at it...well done...

rm_dragonheat23 replies on 3/22/2006 6:57 am:
HBowt2, You are so right. It is hard sometimes not to judge them by adult standards instead of as kids.

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