More Than Words  

rm_creepnldy 40F
279 posts
5/2/2006 10:30 pm

Last Read:
5/3/2006 6:04 pm

More Than Words

Yes, I quote a lot of songs on here, but I LOVE really moves me (emotionally). So, I was thinking about a letter I wrote yesterday saying that the words, "I love you" don't mean that much to me, and I think it might come across wrong. After all, I personally hold them very dear, and use them sparingly, save for with the Little Blessings, but what I meant to convey is that the words alone mean nothing. With the proper actions, they mean the world. When I tell someone I love them, and I have only done this in a romantic way to two men (with one I wasn't "in love" but did love him romantically nonetheless, or so I thought...I still "love" him to this day in a platonic way, but I digress), it means a lot. I don't throw these words around, and I don't like for them to be thrown around. Does that mean that I don't like to be told, "I love you"? Of course, not...just like (almost) everyone else, I love to hear it, too...just make sure you back it up with your actions and don't say it as a question, a response, or as filler when the conversation dies. I am not speaking to anyone specifically...I just think this is advice that would do us all good. I have had more than a few people in my life who did just that--they would say it expecting a response or just because they didn't know what else to say.

Now, I must admit that I do this to my 70+ y/o grandmother but that is because I was raised where you are always respectful, so when she says something I do not agree with, I say that I love her...and, I do, following right behind the Little is also to remind me not to say anything else to her because she is older and has earned the right to say what she wants. The woman has worked hard all her life, from when she quit school in 9th grade to help take care of siblings and cousins because she had been orphaned by 4, to when she worked two jobs--one in a cotton mill--to support her family.

Wow, I got a bit carried away.

Every time I think about how powerful these three little words can be when conveyed properly, I am reminded of my mother telling me she loved me when she could no longer talk. She was on a ventilator and would put her hand over her trach and say, "" But, she didn't have to say it because I really already knew. Funny how life changes, when she was one of the people who said it for 23 years and didn't back it up with actions. So, we all can change how we use it. I just want to add that I also am not, let me repeat...NOT, one for PDA. I never have been. (This is so different than doing things in places where you "could" get caught. *wink*) Last week, I was holding hands, kissing in public, making out in public, and acting like a giddy school girl. It felt natural for the first time EVER. I can't believe I did it, but if it wouldn't have felt right, I wouldn't have. Okay, now for my song...are you ready?

You know from the title of my post what it is...think back...I was in high school.

More Than Words
by Extreme

"Saying I love you
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you
Not to say, but if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel
More than words is all you have to do to make it real
Now that I've tried to talk to you and make you understand
All you have to do is close your eyes
And just reach out your hands and touch me
Hold me close don't ever let me go
More than words is all I ever needed you to show

Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
'Cause I'd already know
What would you do if my heart was torn in two
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying I love you
More than words"

Go show someone you love them...I plan to in a few weeks.
Goodnight all,

rm_TexNVa 49M/48F
376 posts
5/3/2006 3:15 am

I agree with you on a lot of things there; but Extreme? Not my favorite. OK, they're not even on my list.

But what is important is that the words speak to YOU.

Music is one of my oldest, bestest friends.

I show those I love, my love every chance I get. If you're lucky I'll let you watch

rm_creepnldy replies on 5/3/2006 3:38 am:
Often, I think I was on the receiving end of that...but watching is fun, too! And, Extreme was really cool when this came out, or at least this song was. I don't even remember their other music right off the top of my head, but all the girls at church camp went to the boys dorm and serenaded them with this song a capella. The memories tied to it, for me, are great! And, yes, the words spoke to me (through my MP3).


_Safira 53F
11260 posts
5/3/2006 4:10 am

I, too, have only said "I love you" to four men whom I loved ... only two with whom I WAS in-love, and only telling one of THOSE gentlemen first. I never had squiffy middle school romances, and the only high school one that mattered (I had dates here and there) was to my first fiance', who I caught in bed with one of my best friends. (Read my Vagina Monologue of 2/14/06.)

I learned, at the age of three, that those who love you can fuck you upside down, backways front, and six ways to Sundays. So I made a vow I would never say it unless I meant it. Just as I made a vow at 18 that I would never make a promise once given because of the horrible mistake I made in breaking one. ***digression #1***

The first words out of my mouth when each of my sons was born were, "I love you," followed by the poem To All Parents by Edward A. Guest. I swore I would raise my children (if I ever had any) that way when I first read it at the age of 12. ***digression #2***

I have said it more spontaneously to my loved ones during this past six months than I ever had in my life. (I mean, good gracious, look at my daily blog post; right?) Why? I feel more loving, more loved than ever ... so why not; right?

Regarding PDA (as opposed to those lovely PSAs) ... I can take it or leave it, depends on my partner. I'm adaptable and accommodating on that one. Though I rather enjoyed a certain PDA about one month ago. (Have you seen the pictures???)

I like your music choice ... Music infuses every part of my life, every day. (I'm listening to the new TOOL CD now.) I have so many that touch me deeply regarding this topic: Nina Simone's version of Jaques Brel's Ne Me Quitte Pas ... ANYTHING by Johnny Mercer (my hero) ... the list could be endless if I got going.

Great post, Lady Black!

Mistress Safira {=}

This is my blog - Comes With Warning Labels. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

RECOMMENDED READING: A F F ... The Only Site For Me?

rm_creepnldy replies on 5/3/2006 6:10 pm:
I haven't seen the pictures....but, I want to. I was asking Tex about that the other day. I really enjoyed that, too. I think I had more PDA in that one night than I ever had before (well, before last week). The night wouldn't have been complete without those sweet kisses from a certain Mistress of the a corset.

(BTW, we need to go to a strip club together...maybe we can coordinate our schedules.)

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