Jealousy is the Enemy of Life  

rm_cre888 61M
6 posts
6/23/2005 9:05 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Jealousy is the Enemy of Life

The perfect woman is not jealous, or at least uses her feelings in positive ways. It strikes me as one of the most unfortunate aspects of man/woman relationships that strong, unreasonable jealousy is more common than common sense. It means most of us endure foolish pains that all too often destroy that which is otherwise wonderful.

Incidentally, this blog is about the perfect woman, so the the words are focussed on that, but jealousy strikes men just as much as women, often with violent results, and it is an evil force for both sexes to deal with.

I can understand the evolutionary pressures that require strategies for young procreating couples to put survival of the young above pleasures of the flesh.

Orgasm is an example. It was enough for the larger, inseminating sex to acheive a garanteed orgasm, especially if it is entirely attached to ejaculation. It mattered far less in pregnancy terms that the female enjoyed herself at the same time, just so long as she fell pregnant. Hence the more problematic and less certain female orgasm.

Likewise, the enjoyment of love and sexuality was more about pleasure, and jealousy a natural strategy to keep people in line because, simple relationships are more likely to make more babies. Unfortunately human life has evolved past the survival of cave people in terms of length of life, our aspirations, and our need for self expression. Yet we have this archaic hangover from the distant past as a millstone around our necks.

Naturally, I write this from a position of experience. My wife would be incensed mere to know I was writing this, she would see this as a betrayal. The saddest thing is that the jealously protective thinking patterns don't even admit that jealousy is at work. Nor do they permit rational discussion on the subject.

Perversely, jealous rages often provoke the accusation that the jealous person wants to talk, but the jealousee does not. There can be no answer to this, after all, a lack of desire to anwer quickfire accussatory and angry questions is after all by definition a lack of desire to talk. That 'talk' by most of us is meant to be an interactive discussion that countenances different points of view seems not to occur to the jealous person. Or at the least, becomes a theory that is soon forgotten at the mention of certain key anger making concepts.

So, what does one do? Weigh the pros and cons and come up with some semblance of a balanced choice? Submit to the demands? Quietly find expression when and where it can be found? For me the latter is the choice, balanced with the desire to find real friendships with those with broader mindsets.

It's not a perfect solution, but then I am yet to discover the perfect woman.

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