Dirty old men (and women)  

rm_connor696 60M
944 posts
8/22/2005 7:55 pm

Last Read:
7/4/2006 12:36 pm

Dirty old men (and women)

I spent the day babbling at rooms full of college students, and I have to say that I'll be kinda happy when it starts getting cooler and those women put some freakin' clothes on.

Of course, I would never breach a professional relationship, even by so much as looking a bit too long, but you can see things that make the old heart go pitter pat just walking down the street. And then comes the self-recriminations. I mean, it's not as if I'm closing in on Humbert Humbert (the main character of Nabokov's Lolita); thse women are adults--very young adults, true, but they can vote and drive and join the army and kill people. You know: adults. The desire doesn't map onto anything illegal. Still, the idea that a forty-nine-year-old man might be turned on by a twenty-year-old's body makes a lot of people frown in disgust. And so it makes me nervous.

Does that apply to forty-nine-year-old women, too? I'm not sure. Do those in the "general public" (whatever that means--not AdultFriendFinder, I guess) get all twitchy at the idea of women becoming wet watching twenty-year-old men playing volleyball with their shirts off? I think not, which probably means only that women have always been perceievd to have less power than men do, so that their sexual desire is never seen as a threat. That's changing, I think--both the perceptions and the reality--but some residue remains.

Still, I hate having to feel all yucky when these women are dressing to impress. So what if they don't mean to impress me? Hey, I'm impressed.

Oh well, history has shown all too clearly where this leads. The lives of Abelard and Heloise may have given us one of the most moving love stories ever recorded, but the tale is not a happy one. More common--and thankfully less violent--is the chain of events described in Sue Grafton's "six-word novel": "Horny professor, failing coed: no tenure."

Me? I'm just going to keep my eyes on the floor until they start wearing sweatshirts!

(Yes, this has been a silly post. The next one, though--on mentoring and eros--will be a little more serious. Promise.)

rm_StarlitHour 36F

8/22/2005 8:55 pm

Oddly enough professor, young college age women in my experience get a thrill out of turning professor's heads. They may not have any intention of doing anything other than baiting them... but it amuses them and makes their 'personal' and 'unique' declaration of independance valid.

I also have had friends in achidamia who despised professors even noticing gender. But I know that the majority of parents feel that professors should view college students as extentions of high school students. This seems strange to me. Men of all ages chase the youngest women legaly acceptable. Why should it be so 'dirty' when you only think of the same thing?

I'd accept the interest as part of my fantasy life perhaps, and move on? Or I'd be praying for snow. good luck-Starlithour

redmustang91 57M  
8657 posts
8/22/2005 10:15 pm

A normal male of any age would be turned on by an attractive lightly clad coed. Just don't do anything to anyone in your classes as that is a conflict of interest and misuse of your position. Non students over 18 are legal but of dubious propriety.

Theflinkychick 105F

8/23/2005 11:10 am

I don't think you would be human if it didn't turn you on at least a little. Lighten up on yourself, man, it's only looking and WE ALL LOOK!

But on the other hand, while I don't worry too much about age myself, it'd be difficult to find enough commnon ground to remain interested in someone who wasn't old enough to understand and remember the same pop culture or who didn't have much life experience.

Not all who wander are lost.

rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
8/23/2005 12:32 pm

You are a human being, it's only natural to look. Now, if you taught elementary school I would be concerned. Fall is just around the corner.........

pseudohippie 50F

8/23/2005 11:18 pm

Studies supposedly suggest that men are more visual than women. Dunno, I have this mega-dose of cones in my eyes and so I'm extraordinarily visual, especially in the color realm.

But I never look at the bodies of strangers of either gender and think sexual thoughts. I never have. I can appreciate their beauty, but I don't think sexual thoughts about someone until their brain, personality, humor, etc. spark my interest. Even now, as a 38 year old female hormonal maniac, it still takes a lot more than bare skin to entice me sexually...unless it's the bare skin of my lover, that is.

I like your blog, Connor. Thanks for responding to MissAnnThrope's blog so I was able to learn of its existence!

pseudohippie 50F

8/23/2005 11:20 pm

P.S. Sweatshirts are HOT! lolololol

Goldenhairgodess 63F
396 posts
9/1/2005 11:31 pm

I sympathize with your predicument(sp?) Commer;
In the teaching profession, any false move (or percieved wrong move)
can have serious consequencies. Maybe you can train your mind to do
something boring to distract you from the temptation? Then you will
be able to lift your eyes off the floor? Maybe memorize a poem to
recite in your head to block your eyes message to the brain?

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