Does time run out?  

rm_cjcj9 41F
745 posts
2/1/2006 6:12 pm

Last Read:
12/12/2006 6:48 am

Does time run out?

There has been a few times in my life where I wish I would have spoke up. Where I wish I would have said what was on my mind or in my heart. Those things still weigh on my mind and I wonder if that means something. Does that mean they need to be said? With passing time does it lose what the intended meaning is? For example, if you loved somebody and that person loved you, but you never told them that you loved them....should you even if circumstances have changed to not allow you to love eachother? Should you confess something? Or, does time wash it all away? If there was someone that you loved, even if it was 3 years later, would you want them to tell you what you had always asked them to? Or, would it even matter if you heard it?

HerdsSinewTiers 49M  
22 posts
2/2/2006 2:20 am

Yes, I would want to know. I didn't tell a girl how I felt about her and I have regretted what happened ever since. Did it make a difference when I did tell her. Hard to say, she had been so hurt by the other guy that I don't think my love could penetrate the hurt. Tell the person it would make a difference.

MillsShipsGayly 51M

2/2/2006 7:48 am

Time is relative ...

Maybe off-topic but Ihave not been on good speaking terms with my own mother. I often wonder if I will be able to live with myself if she passes away and we don't bridge the gap ...

rm_bluedog4791 42M
74 posts
2/2/2006 8:10 am

I don't think those things should be said. I don't know what it accomplishes besides clearing the air and I am not sure it really does anything to healing of regrets and possible broken hearts. I guess though what interests me is your comment that circumstances have changed "not allowing" you to love? I understand circumstances can prevent your being together, but do you ever stop loving the person?

To your last question, for me that is good reason for not telling or wanting to be told. It could matter and impact my life in a way I would not be prepared for, a bombshell so to speak.

I know it's different for everyone and every relationship even.

rm_talktame44 56M
63 posts
2/2/2006 8:13 am

It's just like everything else CJ.....just as a pebble entering the water makes those rings that grow larger and larger....everything we do has consequences......I know....sound kinda kung fu-ish.... but I guess unless we are completely selfish.....they have to considered. We can't change what's been we have to consider what the knowledge will do....does it build or destroy? Is it for your peace of mind? Or theirs? In some's the greatest sacrifice we make not to say anything.

So Grasshopper......I can't give you a definative answer....that must come from within......

MyRealLoverOne 45M

2/2/2006 8:13 am

I think I would ask myself what the purpose of sharing this information be...and what could be the outcome of sharing this. This is not a right or wrong only you can search your heart on and truly know what is best.

fsuliber 42M

2/2/2006 8:59 am

My answer: It depends on the person. Is he someone that holds this against you and holds grudges?

I personally don't hold grudges. I cannot think of a single person that I have never forgiven for their transgressions against me. In fact, very recenlty I told someone that I loved them and did not get it in return. If she came to me three years down the line and told me, it would give me great comfort. Just because she didn't say those words to me, doesn't mean my feelings for her has changed.

a_poetman 45M

2/3/2006 10:40 pm

I never have regret. I never bite my tongue. I always say what I feel and believe me that is hard to do. I think my family respects me for it and comes to me for honest advice, and my friends just think I say it as it is...

ArgosPlumyKooky 45F
3902 posts
2/4/2006 11:35 am

good question. there are things that i re-play in my mind, situations when i should have spoken up for the underdog, for what was right, and i was a chickenshit. now i try to open my mouth whenever i get the feeling i should, becasue i hate the feeling of regret.

rm_cjcj9 41F
188 posts
2/5/2006 7:08 am

RJ!! Thanks for posting!! Your story sounded sad! How did you feel about it?

Michael...I don't know you, but I would say that is one of those regrets that would be very hard to deal with...I think you should call her and talk to her...I think you would hurt tremendously if something happened to her.

blue...I don't think you stop loving just because circumstances change. Yes, you are right...I don't know what it would accomplish thats why I asked. I have been in this situation on both sides. Where I wanted to say something and where I have been told. I have tried to take from those experiences and make it different when I am faced with them again...

talk....My kung fu master...I loved the part where you said the greatest sacrifice is saying nothing at all. I concur!! But, it doesn't make it easy!!

MyRealLover...Yes!! But, if time had passed, how would you feel if someone came to you with a confession? If it was more for the sake of being said than trying to change things?

fsu...How would you feel if 3 years down the road she came to you and said I love you, too? Would you want to know?

jake...I agree. I think time is precious. Like I said, I have tried to learn from these circumstances and learn to say what I feel when I am in that situation. I hope I have learned something.

poet...that is the best way to be...I hope I am the same way one day because even though I have learned....I know I still let some circumstances pass me by.

snatch....I hate that feeling, too. Would you go back to say something in those situations just because it was weighing on your mind? Do you feel that would remove any of the regret?

Plano69 54M

2/7/2006 6:20 am

I think we feel that way because we want closure. The emotional weight lifted I think helps a person to grow and transform...
Plus it would be nice to know what could have happened... Of course, if you find out someone you loved also loved you in return, you may regret not having said anything till years later, but it's still better than not knowing... and wondering what if...
Cleansing your soul, with tears...

fsuliber 42M

2/8/2006 11:02 am

I would absolutely want to know. If everything else was the same in 3 years and she came back to tell me that, it might be time for me to take a different path in my life.

Become a member to create a blog