"Hey, saw you on AFF..."  

rm_chislut 42F
1534 posts
5/30/2006 3:48 pm

Last Read:
8/31/2006 9:28 am

"Hey, saw you on AFF..."

It's happened. I saw a profile of a guy I know.

Of course, I looked at his profile, which means if he looks, he'll see me in the list of people who have looked at his profile.

I think guys look at that list more than girls do, but I'm not sure. I generally don't look. I get enough email as it is and don't need to go emailing people myself. And I'm vain! I don't want to know who it is who's looked at my profile and decided NOT to contact me! LOL! Yeah, I do laugh at myself sometimes.

So... this guy that I know. I know his whole family. He has a brother who I wouldn't be at all surprised to see here and I would definitely say something to him if I saw *him* here. We'd laugh about it! But, the brother I actually did see? I'm pretty sure he'd be embarrassed that I saw it. AND he'd be embarrassed to know that I knew he'd read MY profile. Or seen my picture.

Oh, I also found out that one of my coworkers has a brother who has a profile on here as a couple with his wife. The wife being of the brother that is. Not the coworker. Which would make a much more interesting story, come to think of it.

So, I don't know this is weird. He has a typo in his profile and one of his photos doesn't show him at his best. He's more attractive in real life. But, I can't tell him any of this because I can't tell him I saw him.

I think this might sound like I'm fretting about it more than I am. I actually find it very amusing. Bizarre, but amusing.

cheddarguy60 56M
50 posts
5/30/2006 4:30 pm

The other day I posted an item on my blog about getting a photo via AdultFriendFinder from a female co-worker. This was a few months back. Great gal, but in any workplace today one needs to fear "workplace sexual harassment."

When I told her. she was a bit unnerved. But I've watched her life start to change for the better (from a distance, I'm not going that route) so the AdultFriendFinder experience has been pretty good for her self esteem.

rm_chislut replies on 5/30/2006 5:53 pm:
Even with all the negative emails, this place is a HUGE ego booster for a female. Someone else put it this way: "In real life, a woman might be a 5. On AdultFriendFinder that makes her an 8."

I don't know how AdultFriendFinder affects guys' self-confidence, but for women it's wonderful. Which I think would translate into being more self-confident in real life, which in turn makes people *treat* you like you're worth more, and so on...

rm_expect_humor 44M

5/30/2006 5:19 pm

I vote for mind games... See if you can put yourself in a position where you are around this guy a bit more than normal. In the process of light and fluffy conversation, talk of your dating woes and how you have sought out men in alternate ways. Indicate that AdultFriendFinder was mentioned to you.

Just to see what he does... It might be worthwhile... Or a huge set up for very little return.

rm_chislut replies on 5/30/2006 5:55 pm:
Oh, that's mean.

I mean, that would be great if I didn't like the guy, but I do. Just not in *that* way. So, neither do I want to hint to him that *I'm* looking here.

I wish it was his brother instead. That would have been fun. We'd share stories. Oh well.

absolutelynormal 56F
6563 posts
5/30/2006 7:00 pm

Mac send him an email that says soemthing like "My cousin's sister-in-law's niece's friend saw you on AdultFriendFinder and want you to know you have a typo and your pic sucks."

rm_chislut replies on 5/30/2006 7:35 pm:
LOL! (No, really, I AM LOL.)

rm_onlineparty 33M
23 posts
5/31/2006 12:02 am

As a guy I Would find it to be strange moment at first to have someone come up to you and straight out ask you if you where on a website like this. I know one of my firends know that I am on here and he likes to just mess with me for that fact, but that what comes with sighning up for a website like this. For this website boosting your self image of your self, is how much you will base you self image of someone just knowing you from some picture or a few fact that you write about youself.(Me persanal, I dont take it to heart, thier to much to life to worry about then someone turning you down)Also as a guy I got to say it alway nice to meet and talk to people and see if you hit it of but I dont take it to my self pride if I get turn down or it just does not work out. It just part of life, not everyone going to like each other, some will, some will just hate each other. I could see as a women or man geting someone that email you saying that you beutful and lovely and all that, has to alway bring a smile to your face and help your pride, but hopeful You can feel this way about your self with out this, and to all the negative emails that anyone get just dont take it to your heart, and rember this person realy does not know who you realy are.

AboutFuckingTime 46M
5 posts
5/31/2006 1:04 pm

I could never own up to having a profile. In fact, I don't have one. I'm not evern typing this response right now!

dorkyhandle71 45M
2 posts
5/31/2006 7:03 pm

I happened over here checking out your profile. As a regular guy that isnt black, or has a ginormous penis, or is built like Edward Norton in American History X. It kind of hurts the ego to be honest. Although i know logically and from asking ex gf's for an honest opinion of my skills in bed im pretty damned good. I make up in size for skills and stamina but that doesnt translate well on the internet or in pictures. NOt to mention EVERY guy claims to be good at oral here no matter if they are or not. So thats out as well. So as a regular guy this place is horrid for the ego and one has to be pretty self confident to even attempt any kind of hookups as a single guy. Married guys i bet have an even harder time.


fitsdfman 46M
3 posts
6/1/2006 9:21 am

I run a business that employs a handful of hot young women ages 18-25 with "alternate" and "emerging exploratory" sexualities. As they are our employees, we have a strict "no touch" rule, but it never fails to make me laugh when I see one of them posting an ad here, looking at mine, or even funnier - answering my ad, knowing I've turned it down in real life already..

The intersection of internet life and real life is a fascinating place to sit, especially when you're the one with the extra information

rm_chislut replies on 6/2/2006 3:42 am:
Hey, tell those hot 18-25 year old women to go find somewhere else to play! Especially if they're tall and blonde. Oops... did I say all that out loud?

**putting my insecurity back in my pocket where it belongs**

wildtimesinnaper 46M

6/1/2006 9:11 pm

You can change your settings so if you look at people's profiles, it won't show up on their "Who's viewing me list." I don't show up on yours and I look at your profile every day!!!!!

rm_chislut replies on 6/2/2006 3:44 am:
Yeah, I know, but most of the time I don't see the point in that. Except when some guy thinks I *must* be interested in him because I looked at his profile. I look at the profile of almost anyone who emails me. Just curiosity.

Pssst... I don't change my profile often, you know. You can probably cut down to once a week.

AGNJoe1 47M

6/1/2006 9:16 pm

Well, I know for sure it's not me. I work with all guys. Bummer. I'd love to run into you.


BDinChicago 41M

6/7/2006 4:44 pm

I saw in chat once that a guy who is a regular there was talking about where he worked (location, etc.) and then he mentioned the company. Wouldn't you know it, we're co-workers. I probably don't know him and vice a versa but at first I felt a bit worried that he might see my profile and recognize me (although we're both on her looking for women). I doubt it will ever be an issue but this makes me question the separation of who I am in my personal life (no matter how tame or wild) and my professional life. I mean, it's a free country and there's definitely nothing illegal going on here, we're all consenting adults, etc. so why should I feel ashamed or embarrassed that someone might see me on here. They're here for basically the same reasons I am.

It reminds me of when I was a kid and my mom would take me shopping at K-Mart. At first I would feel embarrassed if I saw a friend or classmate and try to avoid them in the aisles...I didn't want word getting out at school that my family shopped there....but then it hit me...duhhh, if they saw me there then I of course saw them and the same thing could be said of them.

I'll use this thinking if I ever am approached by someone I know for recognizing me on this site. I could be out trying to score hookers and blow (not necessarily in that order or even at the same time which are both illegal activities (and some higher ups in my company have been arrested for doing and subsequently fired) and would hence render me a poor representative of my employer. Here, however, its a controlled, legal environment and to each their own.

I'm not even close to a bible banger by any means but "judge not me lest ye be judged" works well here...

KudosFlaysLupus 43M
44 posts
6/9/2006 7:25 am

God I hope I don't run into any co-workers on this site. That would suck for me as I think it would create a lot of gossip among the staff. Hence no pic on the profile. I wonder what I would do if I saw someone on here that I knew??????? I will have to have a cup of coffee and sit on this for a little while.

rm_able_lover 54M
11 posts
6/9/2006 7:06 pm

Reminds me of what Larry the Cable guy said when he seen his mom and dad having sex. "I'm never going to that web site again". Unlike Larry I'll be back often.

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