how we picture ourselves....  

rm_chanda69 47F
648 posts
6/3/2006 12:47 am

Last Read:
3/25/2009 7:59 pm

how we picture ourselves....

this should be a sign... its 3:15 AM & im back on here.
( i had a thought while lurking elsewhere. )

how different from the way you look is the way you feel inside? i sometimes imagine myself looking like roseanne barr, - its not really that bad- more like commidenne grace kelly of "grace under fire"
but in the arms of a man that knows what i need & is capable of providing it, i become something else entirely.
as i said in a recent comment, inside i am the body of jamie lee curtis in "perfect"; dancing, responding & writhing like the girl in red waiting for vin diesel in "XXX" so my question is-- how do you see yourself? if you are someone that cannot post a real pic, then find something that shows how you see yourself in your fantasies. i want to see what you look like inside...
OX- this pic is for you...my favorite dali.... can you guess....
i havent forgotten
.



XXXOOOXXXchanda


ThaRealLiv 43M

6/3/2006 2:17 am

The pic reminds me of tha first two lines of a song I put on another profile. Who's OX?


PeensChubsTabby 54M
30 posts
6/3/2006 10:22 am

hey Chanda,
Even though I'm working its a beautiful day to be outside. Not a bad job either. Dirty and muddy but its clean mud. Short bursts of gut busting but long waits in between. Have you ever seen a 5 foot long pipe wrench? Reminds me of being a kid with some oversize play tool only this is the real thing....In response to your question; first off, its a good one. For one thing I think the work people do is sometimes a big indicator of how they preceive themselves. It is for me. Once while entering a restaurant with three guys(we were in steel toes jeans and tees) a group of suit and ties went in about the same time. We obviously didn't meet their approval and I said to my buddies I guess we do look kind of rough. My buddy said, Look at it this way. You're making twice the money they are and you know nobody in there is going to fuck with you. In looking back I've always, even as a kid, had jobs that I felt fit my "image"...
I suppose I daydream along the same lines. generally its always an adventure, usually in prehistoric time, always some sort of surviving something....The same with what I read and watch on TV too. So being that I've watched Outlaw Josey Wales 50 times and own my own copy, and can quote most of the lines as i watch then I must see myself as......"All that big talk's doodliesquat"
Have a great day.
Buck


SorrySarinSheik 55M
2 posts
6/3/2006 5:54 pm

Hi there,
Loved your profile, very well thought out and straight to the point.
John


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/3/2006 6:11 pm

    Quoting ThaRealLiv:
    The pic reminds me of tha first two lines of a song I put on another profile. Who's OX?
i read some of your blog, but you're a much more prolific writer than i, & i see that you like putting song quotes in, but i cant figure what song this reminds you of. tell me & i'll tell you what this painting means to me.

BTW- OX is someone that owes me a spanking
XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


PeensChubsTabby 54M
30 posts
6/3/2006 8:22 pm

On late again? How are the knees? You know if you had laid with your head backwards more you could have herniated neck disk. It could be worse. Back to the question. On the outside I think if I could swap 5 lbs of gut to each ass cheek I'd look better. As for my face I guess i looked less like a Mongolian/Indian genetic disaster from a lost episode of Star Trek when Spock lost emotional control while "seeking out new life on some new world in a strange new universe" or however the hell that went. I suppose I can always pretend I look like Charles Bronson or god help me Patrick Duffy. At least no ones compared me to Lou Firigno or The Hulk yet. Of course having no ass I could probably transform and rip shoes and shirt to pieces and only suffer a case of high water britches just like he did.
Jesusgod I better go to bed.
Buck
How was that for about 4 abstract leaps from whereever to


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/3/2006 8:48 pm

so buck- what do you do that you're in steel toes? ive personally always preferred a man in jeans & a flannel than suit & tie. if i made a list of turn ons, the smell of woodsmoke & man on a flannel shirt makes my knees weak-( they are pretty sore BTW- got the doc to call in some darvocet that has helped)
i dated a computer programmer once. just so happened i was working part time & was offered good money to do a remodel with a buddy & of course we started with the roof- ive done everything from footers to final paint- didn't take long before my hands were rougher than his. haven't had a lot of luck with those situations.
as far as how i really look, im planning on having a tummy tuck & boob job next spring, & then i'll probably have the most pics on here!
XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


PeensChubsTabby 54M
30 posts
6/4/2006 8:38 am

Hey Chanda,
In a nutshell we make little rocks out of big'uns. I've always thought that a lack of oxygen to the brain from a buttoned shirt and a tie is probably the root cause of everything wrong in the Western World. Just a theory.....If I could be 18 again I might take uphouse building for a living. During a lay-off a few years back i was working 2 days every other week and i spent the summer helping 2 of my best friends from high school build a huge vacation home way back the mountains. One of the best times i've ever had...Question for you. Whats the best compliment you've ever gotten? The best you ever given?


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/4/2006 12:36 pm

best compliment was from mike- a friend of my brothers. he was riding to court with me where my boyfriend was being sentenced & i needed moral support(this was a long time ago) as we walked up the courthouse steps he stepped back & said "damn,"chanda" you got some great legs- you should wear skirts like that more often" while eying me up & down. i wore jeans pretty much always, & i had always thought mike was hot. so it really stuck in my mind- this was almost 20 years ago.
i guess the best i ever gave was when i told my mom she DID know what she was talking about & she WAS right. - it was good enough to render her speechless- something VERY difficult to do in my family.
if i could be 18 again i'd probably be an exotic dancer with her shit together, no drugs, no screwing customers, in a very exclusive club, making lots of money & investing it, staying in shape, & driving men wild. i think doing it that way would be a very empowering experience.
XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/4/2006 7:52 pm

is
(kneels at Sir's feet, leaning forward to place forehead against Sir's knee)"i am truly sorry Sir.i was wrong for being saucy with You.it was disrespectful and it wont happen again."
(attempting to slow breathing)

" would You like a martini?"
XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/4/2006 8:48 pm

since i am wide awake & no one i know is blogging right now, i thought id let you all in on the significance of the dali i posted here. its a long story......
several years a go i was married & in central florida( CENTRAL PART OF HEL my ex was a 32 yr old tile setter by day & a drug dealer all the time. he was a manic depressive sex addict that had an 8 pk belly from fucking. he also really wanted to see me eat pussy. we had been married a year when i ran into an old friend that started partying with us.
she had slightly olive skin, very soft, thick dark hair, dark eyes,......

anyway after spending the night on our couch a few times, she started teasing me about next time shes drunk on our couch & shes out there listening to me scream & moan, shes just going to come in & join us.
so one night she did! we had it pre arranged(she & i- he was clueless), agreed on who felt comfortable with what, & the first time was so amazing, it became a routine. kids went to grandmas saturday afternoon,she came over & we went muddin' or dancing or had a party at home. she spent the night, & we all spent sunday drinking coffee & recovering.
one day she came to the house all excited, carrying something wrapped in brown paper, like a large picture. a salesman had come to her office selling prints, & when she saw "dream"....
she thought of us.
she is the woman lying down, helpless, awaiting what is to come, the ex & i were the tigers, pouncing on her devouring her, savoring her body.
it hung in our room over the bed until the day she told me she couldn't come around any more. he was starting to scare her. he was abusive to me (part of why i left) & she couldn't take it any more. when i told him that night , first he cried the missing her out, then put his fist through the painting, then told me never to speak of her again.

i still miss her sometimes. she had the most delicious skin...
XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/8/2006 8:01 pm

the diamonds thing would be fine (my last involvement liked book tv- i loved giving him head while he watched that, or congressional debate, or texas hold em poker.)

love the idea of after the surgery!- ever "played" with a surgical glove & some good lube? not playing doctor, just inserting fingers, rubbing lips, etc. the latex gives a very different feel on the receiving end- no fingernail edges or rough spots- & its fun with you being on the receiving end too! i had a male friend that used to have some on hand for himself- construction hands are not kind- & it makes clean up easier.

XXXOOOXXXchanda


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/10/2006 12:30 pm

hi! Ox! i usually do check back, because i read older blogs alot- & sometimes leave a comment so i figure, if i do it, surely there are others!

as for the gloves, i have a little experience with prostate stimulation, & have been on the recieving end of glove treatment & its incredible!!! but what i was referring to was to stroke your cock with it , using edible lube...mmmmmmm gulp mmmmm
they also come in handy for me- if the kids will be home soon, i can slip one on, grab the ky & "rub out a quickie" (wanna call that ruq in the future?) & when im done i take off the glove, pee, wipe & the cleanup is done. when youre at risk of a 4 yr old waking up early or sick, you come upwith all kinds of tricks! i had an ex that used to masturbate with a condom on! worked great!

so if your up for PS- i certinly wont dom you, so how's this- me on my back, legs spread wide, (ankles tied to opposit corners, maybe?) head hanging off the edge, your cock in my mouth, my hands massaging your balls & ass, your hands ravaging my body, both of us gloved & dripping.

im really glad you came to this one & i could respond- in a more recent post i responded to comments with the promise of a story. this is the abbreviated version. it may take a few days- i have family in town.

is kneeling at Your feet, head to knee... i'm very glad You got to hear it first Sir.

XXXOOOXXX chanda


XXXOOOXXXchanda


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/10/2006 10:36 pm

    Quoting rm_Ox612:
    Hey Chanda, my sweet, family in town, 10-4. Enjoy (or cope, as the case may be). I hope "enjoy" is more applicable.

    Ox.

definitely an enjoyable visit & thank you!!!
XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


rm_chanda69 47F
418 posts
6/10/2006 10:53 pm

    Quoting rm_Ox612:
    Hey Chanda, my sweet, family in town, 10-4. Enjoy (or cope, as the case may be). I hope "enjoy" is more applicable.

    Ox.

as for the next- i just don't understand why someone would be on a site like this, then think they need to stand in judgment for someones preferences. if she isn't into D/s, ok but don't criticize what you don't understand! i don't get riled about much these days, but if there had been a brawl it would have been her getting pounded- & not by a cock. (unless you want to play with her when im through....giggles)

i like the geisha idea, or how about a gentleman pirate's captive?

as for the rest- i recently discovered being slapped on the cheek with a hard cock.- almost sent me over the edge! light slaps to the face are ok, more sting elsewhere. not into nipple clamps, or tying my breasts ( saw a photo of that that was pretty extreme- really freaked me out for a while) im not into pain, per se, but rather the possibility or threat of it. a firm grip, a fist gripping my hair close to the scalp, teeth on the back of my neck & shoulders, a hard grasp on my hipbones while being taken from behind....
i have thought a lot lately about what would happen in the real world if i really tried this. i would absolutely need a safeword, & a caution. (yellow light & red light?)

anyway- its getting late & i have an itch to scratch before sleep. hope you like the new post c ya 2 moro!

XXXOOOXXX chanda

XXXOOOXXXchanda


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