a question  

rm_bucfannn 61M/60F
1805 posts
6/21/2006 4:06 pm

Last Read:
6/26/2006 4:51 am

a question

Is your work more important to you than a possible relationship?

I was speaking with a friend of mine today. He moved to the Tampa Bay area from Lauderdale in January, and started a new position with a new company. It was supposed to be a "build it and see what happens" kind of deal. Well... four months later, he has built his territory to unbelievable heights. And, the powers that be, want more and more.

His territory expanded to the entire west coast of FL, including the panhandle, (which is about an eight hour drive in itself), and inland.

He is forgoing any semblance of a social life.


It's not what he wants, obviously, but, it is what it is. It may change in four to five weeks, or so he says, but, I doubt it.

All I can say is, it sucks a big one.

'Nuff said.


oldude1946 70M

6/21/2006 4:37 pm

When I have a girlfriend they are always number one to me. But I think maybe sometimes I'm to good for my on good.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:01 am:
You are good, sweetie. That's why I like you so much

badtwin53 57M/63F

6/21/2006 4:45 pm

I am guilty of being a work-aholic. I teach and work at a grocery store in the evening. You are right, it does suck. The only time I do have a social life is during the summer when school isn't in session. I tend to make up for lost time. I hope your friend does find time to relax and maybe find that someone special....the one he wants to be at home with.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:05 am:
I keep telling him he needs to slow down. He's been very sick twice in these 4 months from pushing so much. Does he listen? Nope. Said he has the rest of his life to have a relationship. I told him, yeah sure you do. Who the hell is gonna want a worn out old man?

peaches19555 61M

6/21/2006 6:26 pm

work changes and relationship grow..

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:05 am:
In a normal life, yes it does. He is not living a normal life... the dummy...

softnlush 53F

6/21/2006 6:31 pm

ummm you know my feelings on this...as I am with someone who is married to his work and yes it does suck

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:05 am:
Yep, I know....

8321 posts
6/21/2006 6:44 pm

Business over Pleasure.



"My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:06 am:
Div, there are priorities and there are PRIORITIES. All Im saying is my bud needs to get a semblance of a life soon, before he's totally burned out...

Eros40 52F

6/21/2006 6:48 pm

I work a full time job and own my own biz. However, I ALWAYS schedule my play time. I'm a nutcase without it. My family and relationships are important to me....I can always find another "job".... I can't replace true friends and/or family.........E.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:07 am:
Exactly. My point completely.

seek_u_topia 50M

6/21/2006 7:15 pm

of course this situation sounds a tad bit lopsided, but there are stretches of time when work does require more effort...or in fact take all the effort you can give it. However, if this type of time committment persists, then it is truly a choice between work and a personal life, in which case I select the life.

life is tough that way sometimes...sucks i know, but we all have to do what we feel is necessary for our satisfaction, and for some men and women, work can provide just as much positive impact as a relationship.

strange but true...though not for me, it is true for some.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:08 am:
I know what you are saying. However, I believe he needs to stop and smell the roses before they wilt. That's all.

BenefitsFriend69 57M/60F

6/21/2006 10:38 pm

"Be careful what you ask for."

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:09 am:
I'm not asking for anything.... well, Ok, I will ask..........


1Sir_Lancelot 59M

6/22/2006 5:16 am

I work afternoons from 2:30 until ???, that in itself makes it hard on a relationship with the different schedules. But I like my free time and try to spend as much of it as I can enjoying life. If I happen to have a partner then even better. I work to live, NOT live to work !!!

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:10 am:
I, too, work a lot of hours. Sometimes to the point that my social existance suffers. I've learned to step back. Took a while to do so, but, I make sure I do do it...

HeardLankaMalls 55M
2925 posts
6/22/2006 5:42 am

Sometimes people have a goal (work, wealth, etc) and use any means possible to gain that. Work can be one of those means, and that may be what you're friend is doing. His success may have even amazed him to the point of not knowing how to say no, much less slow down. Hopefully he'll find a respite in his schedule, or decide he needs a break, and remember his friends that his work obligations have caused him to neglect.

If he's worth still having as a friend, then being there when he needs someone will be worth the wait I'm sure Fann...

Hugs, C

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:11 am:
I know his goals. And they are admirable. However, he is still pushing himself too much. He may learn, but, then again, he may not care at this point.

rm_MisterFrumpy 46M
428 posts
6/22/2006 6:42 am

my work schedule is random after 8-5. Ask SnL about it sometime LOL
I'm NOT a workaholic, but it goes with the job. And since i cant likely find another job making what i'm making doing this i'm stuck with the crappy hours and i do actually like my job.

so to answer your question..yes much to the dismay of others, work comes first. Gotta pay the bills and i cant live the lifestyle to which i've become acustomed without the job.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/22/2006 9:13 am:
I also work alot, Frump. I have to. Bills, etc. But, I refuse to let it come in the way of life anymore. I ain't getting any younger...

rm_jami95 66M
69 posts
6/25/2006 10:27 pm

The brutal truth of the matter is that if someone really wants to see another person, they will make it happen regardless of everything else.....

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