Watch your step...  

rm_bucfannn 61M/60F
1805 posts
6/11/2006 4:19 pm

Last Read:
6/26/2006 11:58 am

Watch your step...

NOUN: reputation

1. The state of being held in high esteem and honor

2. Notoriety for some particular characteristic

3. The general estimation that the public has for a person

Yep. A rep. Always was something to avoid as a teenager. Being considered cheap and/or slutty was not the way to go through high school. People talked behind your back. YOU thought YOU were popular, because of the attention. But, dontcha know, it was the WRONG KIND OF ATTENTION.

But, it didn't register. Nope nope nope. So, the behavior continued. Through the twenties. Sure, you got laid a lot. But, as far as a serious relationship went, maybe you had one, maybe you didn't. And just maybe, the one you had was abusive. But, you were so thankful for the attention, it didn't matter.

Or did it?

Being easy is one thing. Being slutty is another. Sleeping with anything that has a penis is being slutty. And earns you a BAD reputation. Or chasing after anything with a penis. And, it really doesn't matter. If you are getting sex, you are desirable.

Sure you are.

C'mon now, think about it. If you fuck anyone and everyone, and you begin to revel in the attention, step back and look at the big picture. Yea, you are getting attention, of course. 'Cause you're beyond easy. Doesn't matter to a man what you look like. If you're a slut bucket, they like you. Then they use you. Then throw you away like old potato peelings. But, not before passing the word to their buds. You aren't all that and a bag of chips. Nope. You're a slut. You put out. Period.





So yeah. If you think you think that that is the kind of attention you want, go for it. But, don't come crying when you are alone. And, don't wonder why most females won't talk to you. They don't trust you with THEIR men. AND, they have their own reputations to consider. You are who you associate with. Even at this age.

brute472 74M
3480 posts
6/11/2006 10:45 pm

I didn't have time to get a reputation as a teenager I got married instead, a child bridegroom.
It took three marriages and a long journey down lifes pathway for me to catch up with my reputation.(It's a bit tattered now)

HeardLankaMalls 55M
2925 posts
6/12/2006 5:26 am

Very good post Fann.

Reputation means alot, besides in a sexual context. Being trustworthy, and a "nice" human being is important too. And once you lose your rep, as you said, it's very tough to get it back (the same with trust).

Hugs, C

peaches19555 61M

6/12/2006 11:33 am

Reputations are never created by us they are given to us. One might argue that they are earned but this argument minimizes the experiences of others and how those experiences color their world. Walk with me in your black dress and heels and let me tell everyone this is my friend Kat she has a lovely smile. Your smile will be as obvious as your bosom and either the choice of others. If the smile was missed who was at fault? Let us be wide eyed in our observations of others and generous in our gift.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/12/2006 8:44 pm:
Thanks, hon, for your opinion. However, you are missing the point. I am being quite specific here.

seek_u_topia 51M

6/12/2006 3:17 pm

very interesting and quite true in my estimation. a reputation is almost impossible to dispell or out run. I think that applies to bad reps, but not necessarily good ones.

good thought piece

rm_WRNR 66M
2 posts
6/12/2006 11:28 pm

Reputations are on a par with self-fulfilled prophesies.They are only what other people think, opinions persay, and seldom based on the whole truth. What people do is seldom cut and dried and often too quickly judged.If we don't let our hearts lead the way down life's path how can we exercise our free will and ability to choose? Can't do it if we're always looking,listening to weigh everyone else's thoughts.We are adults and most of us had parents who tried their best to teach us right from wrong all those without that advantage have had to go it alone,but no can say that a kindness from another person has not been given to them.Just do the best you can and let those who live to judge have their folley.

LovableAscending 59F

6/13/2006 9:58 am

I totally agree with you! I think women can relate to this better than most men can. It does pertain to men too, but I think most women, the decent ones anyway, have endured the hurt and anger that follows when their man gives a cheap slut their attention.
I've been perusing profiles as of late. I find it humorous and sad at the same time when a woman advertises herself as a completely insatiable, wildly animalistic, utterly sinful fuck. Of course they get attention. And most of them don't mind if that attention is from a man who is attached - matter of fact, the thrill of the hunt seems to be heightened for some especially sick souls if they can lure a man from his current partner. I have my issues, but I thank the heavens above I have not lowered myself to that level. And while I find myself annoyed at the sex goddess wannabe's attention-getting ploys, I blame the men that afford them audience for perpetuating the whole sick, juvenile behavior.
A decent man will take the higher road. I don't encourage anyone to be mean to Miss Seemefeelmefuckme, but partaking in banter (and more) with her only feeds her ego, sometimes at the expense of the one who truly cares about you.
It is a shame when a woman feels a reputation equates to a positive image. But it is just as bad when a man does things to reinforce that twisted thinking. She is already sick. When a man participates in her attention-seeking behavior he is just making her sicker - and possibly hurting the one who loves him.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/14/2006 4:40 am:
THANK YOU! for understanding where I am coming from, in this post. Just an observation I made the other night....

rm_5Hawkeye6 61M

6/13/2006 10:56 pm

Gee, Cat,

I don't know what to make of this - is it a confession, an acknowledgment of guilt? Are you warning someone else away from something that was a bad experience for you?

If so, I hope that you know that there is no wrong in wanting to be loved. Sure, people almost always do humiliating things in order to be noticed by people to whom they are attracted. If those demeaning acts cause them later suffering, they are the only ones who are capable of deciding whether or not they were worth committing.

In any case, it's not a judgment issue for anyone but the actor. A person cannot love someone else without sacrificing, without lowering the barriers that would otherwise continue the pretense of self-reliance that defends each of us from assault from other, less worthy people.

We all need each other to make 'us' complete. Malice and contempt for others is antithetical to that concept. Slandering someone for doing what we all feel compelled to do in various ways (acted on or not) is much worse than any wrong the victim may have committed.

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/14/2006 4:15 am:
No. Tis just an observation is all.

Why is it that some are just not getting what I'm trying to say here? Ideals and standards have NOT changed from the past, no matter how far we have come.

softnlush 53F

6/14/2006 6:36 am

it is because men do not get it...period..and men do not care,obviously as most men prefer the bad rep to a good rep(sexually anyways),I mean you hear it all the time..if a guy is fucking around with countless women,he is to be looked upon as a stud,whathaveyou,where as a women who fucks around is looked upon as a slut (and in some cases,that is exactly what she is) will not refer to her as a slut while he is making his move to be her next bedmate,you know he is thinking it,you know he is telling his buddies about her,you know it..and she,if she is doing it for a false sense of attractiveness/validation as a sexual being,she is not realizing this..I call men sluts when I see them acting slutty and I will not give them the time of day now,in the past I have because of the excitement,well,I rather not be a bedpost notch and rather not have my own bedpost notched either..ya know what I am saying? It is mars and venus,men do not get it,and women need to get it and fast..real fast

rm_bucfannn replies on 6/14/2006 1:06 pm:
Hopefully with your plain english, THEY will finally understand what I am stating here.............

Thanks, Toots

LovableAscending 59F

6/15/2006 10:34 pm

Softnlush I understand what you are saying. It seems a lot of men fall all over the "sluts" so they can get some sexual satisfaction. They will do just about anything to get a piece of ass - even if it leaves the decent women sitting alone in a corner. BUT when it comes time to make a commitment they look past the sluts and try to snuggle up to the "nice girls".
What I don't understand is the cut-throat behavior a lot of women have toward other women. So many will do anything to get the attention of a man - not only hurt other women, but rub it in that they got her man to look at, touch, or fuck them. What is up with that? I guess it's true for many that negative attention is better than no attention. Personally, I'd rather sit alone in the corner with the other decent ladies than show my ass. It's a small price to pay for a good reputation.

rm_jami95 66M
69 posts
6/25/2006 10:42 pm

Personally... I have always had a fond place in my heart for sluts..... but that's just me...

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