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why am i here
why am i here
i live in indianapolis...a nice old neighborhod redbrick road, big old trees. the houses have been fixed up.
when the sun sets, maybe it's the lingering pea soup humidity this week. or the indy 500 race vibe in the air....gunshots..sirens...shouting---grotesque conversation wafting in the wind through my open window---the same window that the thief crawled through to steal my laptop. 2 days later it was returned to the doorstep. 2 days after that the door kicked in and the comp stolen again...what is this world? It isn't the Earth we were promised.
Why do I allow this violence to affect me?
I think--why am I here on this website? to get laid?
One of my favorite things.
the feeling that builds in my navel yearns for release...I have wept enough these past years. real men do weep.
are the supressed emotions of grief manifesting as the lust I feel for you beautiful women? the desire to enter you slowly and breathe in the sweet smell of your exhalations...your hair tickling my neck as we rock in each other's arms blissfully....the warmth of your wet embrace as I empty and fill your womb with my seed...
what is this?
if i break through my body's ache i find the true desire----a companion to stand against the tide that tries to sweep me away from my ideals...a companion that negates my only-ness. some one who is here with me: next to my body and open to my soul.
6/3/2006 11:29 am