A Turning Point  

rm__Reality_ 104F
105 posts
5/2/2006 5:32 am

Last Read:
7/3/2006 6:56 am

A Turning Point

The kids and I eventually made our way back home to NH. I was having a very difficult time dealing with two teenagers and coming home to extended family seemed like the thing to do.

On February 3,2004 I suffered a third and this time near fatal heart attack. They kept me at one area hospital for a week trying to stabilize me so that i could be transferred to the heart institute for surgery. During that time Songbird and SamiJ were my rocks. Sami kept everyone up to date with emails and chatroom updates. She contacted Cam in NC.

One day my hospital phone rang and on the other end i heard that familiar southern drawl.

From then on, Cam and I were close once more. He said "I always hoped you'd forgive me." He admitted that he didnt realize how bad he felt during the time we were in NC and how it impacted him. There was nothing to forgive, he fought his demons the best way he could. I only prayed that he would win.

Time gets away with me, but i believe it was last Fall that Songbird was going to NC for a family thing. She asked me to go. I contacted Cam and he said, wherever, whenever i'll meet you in NC. As the fates would have it, I was too ill to make the trip, i so regret that. Song is going again next month and i have been invited to go with her. Again, the fates have intervened, Cam isnt there.

We talked a lot in the last couple of years. Whenever a little time would pass without hearing from each other, one or the other would write and say, "where are you? i worry" and would immediately write back. We both had health issues and we talked a lot about that. His chemo was buying him months of feeling pretty good but each session left him weaker. He wouldnt come back as strongly as the time before and this was working on his emotional well being.

Chemo is expensive and his portion of the bill was devestating. The day he told me he had sold his harley to defray his costs was a sad day indeed. I knew what this did to him. Next came the boat, what else could he lose? Still I tried to make him see the upside. His aged parents were perfectly willing to sell their home to help him but he wouldnt hear of it. He felt as if his life was gone as he knew it. He felt old.

On his birthday last August 23rd I wrote in this blog. I sent the copy to him along with a card. He wrote back, Sherri you made it possible for me to get out of bed this am. I'll treasure that memory.

Today is his birthday! My Southern man!

I'm still not ready to put his story to print, but i needed to acknowledge today.

Once in a lifetime someone comes into your life who touches you as no one else every has or will. This is Cam.

Regardless of how things transpired, I will always hold him in my heart.

He and I are still connected. i would do anything for him without hesitation. he would do the same for me.

I don't think you can ask for more!

Edit Post

MysteryDreamer 57F

5/2/2006 5:53 am

Dont worry hon, your paths will cross again soon. Hope all is well with you now. The heart is a serious thing. Take care. Hugs and kisses.

rm_songbird5419 62F
305 posts
5/2/2006 9:39 am

ahhh, but he IS there!! and what better way to get closest to him than on the beach in NC? I showed you the house. There's plenty of room to rest and grieve and find peace. *S*

If you are strong and push through the pain and the fear, you often find that happiness is waiting for you on the other side.

rm__Reality_ 104F
67 posts
5/2/2006 9:51 am

ty both *S*

rm__Reality_ 104F
67 posts
5/2/2006 9:57 am

It's true Song. There isnt anyplace in this world that his presence would be felt more strongly than on the "sound and sea"

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