Taco Bell and the $2 bill  

rm_The_joker62
194 posts
9/3/2006 5:39 pm

Last Read:
9/5/2006 7:36 pm

Taco Bell and the $2 bill

On my way home, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. In my wallet is a $50 bill and a $2 bill. That is all of the cash I have on my person.

I figure that with a $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about people getting upset with me.
ME: "Hi, I'd like one seven layer burrito please, to go."
IT: "Is that it?"
ME: "Yep."
IT: "That'll be $1.84, eat here?"
ME: "No, it's to *go*." (I hate repeating myself.)

At his point I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny and
IT: "Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back."

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within earshot. The following conversation occurs between the two of them.
IT: "Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?"
MG: "No. A what?"
IT: "A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me."
MG: "Ask for something else, THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A $2 BILL."
IT: IT: "Yeah, thought so."

He comes back to me and says
IT: "We don't take these. Do you have anything else?"
ME: "Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?"
IT: "I don't know."
ME: "See here where it says legal tender?"
IT: "Yeah."
ME: "So, shouldn't you take it?"
IT: "Well, hang on a sec."

He goes back to his manager who is watching me like I'm going to shoplift, and
IT: "He says I have to take it."
MG: "Doesn't he have anything else?"
IT: "Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change."
MG: "I'M NOT OPENING THE SAFE WITH HIM IN HERE."
IT: "What should I do?"
MG: "Tell him to come back later when he has REAL money."
IT: "I can't tell him that, you tell him."
MG: "Just tell him."
IT: "No way, this is weird, I'm going in back."

The manager approaches me and says
MG: "Sorry, we don't take big bills this time of night." [it was 8pm and this particular Taco Bell is in a well lighted indoor mall with 100 other stores.]
ME: "Well, here's a two."
MG: "We don't take those either."
ME: "Why not?"
MG: "I think you know why."
ME: "No really, tell me, why?"
MG: "Please leave before I call mall security."
ME: "Excuse me?"
MG: "Please leave before I call mall security."
ME: "What the hell for?"
MG: "Please, sir."
ME: "Uh, go ahead, call them."
MG: "Would you please just leave?"
ME: "No."
MG: "Fine, have it your way then."
ME: "No, that's Burger King, isn't it?"

At this point he BACKS away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people STARING at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect. A few minutes later this 45 year oldish guy comes in and says [at the other end of counter, in a whisper]
SG: "Yeah, Mike, what's up?"
MG: "This guy is trying to give me some [pause] funny money."
SG: "Really? What?"
MG: "Get this, a two dollar bill."
SG: "Why would a guy fake a $2 bill?" [incredulous]
MG: "I don't know? He's kinda weird. Says the only other thing he has is a fifty."
SG: "So, the fifty's fake?"
MG: "NO, the $2 is."
SG: "Why would he fake a $2 bill?"
MG: "I don't know. Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?"
SG: "Yeah..."

Security guard walks over to me and says
SG: "Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use."
ME: "Uh, no."
SG: "Lemme see 'em."
ME: "Why?"
SG: "Do you want me to get the cops in here?"

At this point I was ready to say, "SURE, PLEASE," but I wanted to eat, so I said
ME: "I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this $2 bill."

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I was taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and says
SG: "Mike, what's wrong with this bill?"
MG: "It's fake."
SG: "It doesn't look fake to me."
MG: "But it's a **$2** bill."
SG: "Yeah?"
MG: "Well, there's no such thing, is there?"

The security guard and I both looked at him like he was an idiot, and it dawned on the guy that he had no clue.

My burrito was free and he threw in a small drink and those cinnamon things, too. Makes me want to get a whole stack of $2 bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff. If I got the right group of people, I could probably end up in jail. At least you get free food.


DiscreetDelights 50F

9/3/2006 6:23 pm

Ever been in a Wal-Mart when the power goes out and they have to do sales on the handhelds? It's sooooooo worth it just to watch the cashiers try and count back change. NO CLUE.


uhclemclone 61M
33 posts
9/4/2006 12:25 am

Reminds me of an incident from the other side of the counter (I worked in retail management most of my working life).

Guys come in to the store, want to buy a $20.00 item. They have about $10.00 in half dollars. But these are "Walking Liberty" half dollars, minted from 1916 to 1947. How they came to be spending these, I do not know. Anyway, my salesperson was helping them. He was looking at these half dollars very suspiciously. He brought one to me and asked me if they were good money...I told him YES, they were excellent money. Long story short, he took them, I replaced them with a like amount of money out of my pocket and added them to my collection.

Our store had a policy of giving a 10% discount to employees. One day many years ago, I had a person working for me who was attending the local university. I was getting ready to leave, and I wanted to purchase something. I place it on the counter and ask him to write up the sale. He then asks me how to use the calculator to figure out a 10% discount. I asked him why he needed a calculator to figure that out...He looked at me like I was crazy, thinking someone could figure out a 10% discount without a calculator! Of course, this was in a day and age when we hand-wrote all sales tickets. I don't remember how he made change...


goodatpoetry2 66M
12386 posts
9/4/2006 11:27 am

That is SO hard to believe, but then, it isn't.
Even with the "better" education that they supposably get nowadays, somehow they just don't seem as bright.
That was one funny story! Thanks!


marathonman45202 53M
6640 posts
9/4/2006 1:40 pm

Par for the course!


SexxxyLicious28 32F

9/4/2006 3:40 pm

LMAO!


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/4/2006 3:44 pm

    Quoting DiscreetDelights:
    Ever been in a Wal-Mart when the power goes out and they have to do sales on the handhelds? It's sooooooo worth it just to watch the cashiers try and count back change. NO CLUE.
No I cannot say that I have visited that paticular level of hell and hopefully never do


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/4/2006 3:46 pm

    Quoting uhclemclone:
    Reminds me of an incident from the other side of the counter (I worked in retail management most of my working life).

    Guys come in to the store, want to buy a $20.00 item. They have about $10.00 in half dollars. But these are "Walking Liberty" half dollars, minted from 1916 to 1947. How they came to be spending these, I do not know. Anyway, my salesperson was helping them. He was looking at these half dollars very suspiciously. He brought one to me and asked me if they were good money...I told him YES, they were excellent money. Long story short, he took them, I replaced them with a like amount of money out of my pocket and added them to my collection.

    Our store had a policy of giving a 10% discount to employees. One day many years ago, I had a person working for me who was attending the local university. I was getting ready to leave, and I wanted to purchase something. I place it on the counter and ask him to write up the sale. He then asks me how to use the calculator to figure out a 10% discount. I asked him why he needed a calculator to figure that out...He looked at me like I was crazy, thinking someone could figure out a 10% discount without a calculator! Of course, this was in a day and age when we hand-wrote all sales tickets. I don't remember how he made change...
yeah it happens on both sides of the counter


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/4/2006 3:48 pm

    Quoting kittenkisses24:
    what a bunch of bumbling idiots. that was funny as hell. what is wrong with these people. i just can't stop laughing.
my thoughts exactly


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/4/2006 3:51 pm

    Quoting goodatpoetry2:
    That is SO hard to believe, but then, it isn't.
    Even with the "better" education that they supposably get nowadays, somehow they just don't seem as bright.
    That was one funny story! Thanks!
unfortnatley not so hard to believe anymore


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/4/2006 3:53 pm

Yes it is funny now but at the time......


elysianpleasure 47M

9/4/2006 7:48 pm

The is scary funny....


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/5/2006 3:59 am

aint it just so


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/5/2006 4:00 am

    Quoting spunky11961:
    AWW Man that was to funny! Stoopid is as Stoopid does
    ~spunky
uhh wich way did he go George uhhh George?


rm_sexxikritter 52F
2715 posts
9/5/2006 8:13 am

Kittenkisses24 sent me over. I got this story in an e-mail some time ago and laughed my ass off then and still find it to be hilarious, especially since I've worked retail and seen such stupidity. That 10% story is great too. I'm always doing figuring in my head and people react like I'm the eighth world wonder or something......for doing SIMPLE MATH in my head!


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/5/2006 10:26 am

    Quoting SweetMysterie:
    Not sure why things like this surprise me anymore... but that was just too funny!
Yeah aint it a shame we arent suprised by this


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/5/2006 10:30 am

    Quoting rm_sexxikritter:
    Kittenkisses24 sent me over. I got this story in an e-mail some time ago and laughed my ass off then and still find it to be hilarious, especially since I've worked retail and seen such stupidity. That 10% story is great too. I'm always doing figuring in my head and people react like I'm the eighth world wonder or something......for doing SIMPLE MATH in my head!
Lets see 10 % of a dollar would be uhhmmm 1% would be umhh 1 then ya times it 10 times and uhh awww hell where is my calculator


bustybettyboop 50F  
59325 posts
9/5/2006 5:07 pm

that is so funny! lol! hilarious! lol!i work in retail and a grocery store so i see lots of crap from both sides..the funniest thing was this girl i was training at the grocery store and no matter how many times i explained to her how to not scan multiple items that were the same..that u can just put _________ whatever items(#) x amount of items and it was quicker! she couldn't figure it out. i left her to go help a customer and when i came back there was this big line..she was scanning this woman's plastic cups..she had 100 of them. each individually! people were shaking there heads and trying to tell her but she ignored everyone. needless to say she was not a keeper! lol!

..just join me on my blog bustybettyboop and still looking for some hot,sexy,creative contestants for my next contest...come join us! need a blog mentor or want to be one?


rm_The_joker62
315 posts
9/5/2006 7:36 pm

yes it is sad how many people don't seem to have a clue


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