AFF Dates and Fish stink after 30 min or 5 drinks!  

rm_Simplysexy65 50F
870 posts
5/26/2006 5:33 pm
AFF Dates and Fish stink after 30 min or 5 drinks!

I am so excited! I have a hott and I mean hott AdultFriendFinder date! His pictures look just like Johhny Depp. And I have only had two drinks so relax!! I am sober! He said he was going to take me to a wonderful seafood restaurant INLAND! OMG....Ok key word in California is INLAND! It means the fish come from Minnesota! Get It! He says Red Lobster! OMG....I bet he wants bowling after! Then as my enthusiasm starts to die..and I pour ANOTHER drink..he says he is going to dress sharp for me and wear a bow tie! Fuck this is not prom, but hey does he expect sex the first night too now as it was at prom? Most people in bow ties are practically screaming “I have no personality, so I rely on gimmicky accessorizing to stand define myself.” All right, that might have been a little harsh, and maybe you could chalk that up to my jealousy of their ability to tie those things, but still, unless you’re Pee-wee Herman, or Abraham Lincoln, or at the prom, you probably shouldn’t wear a bow tie. But if he is doing that..I am gonna wear my Corn Dog on a Stick Hat...woops I mean Elaine's...I swear....I ..umm..borrowed it! What are friends for!

So, as I pour my fourth drink...or was it fifth? I am beginning to visualize this ...ummm..."experience" no longer qualifies as a date but hell if I am paying...or am I?

I told him I loved seafood and that once on a barefoot cruise, I stole the bowl of shrimp and took it back to my cabin as the brochure had lied and said "shrimp every night" ...they meant the men.. and i was pissed...I love shrimp..Do you know what Krill is? .For those of you who thought that whales only ate puppets and disobedient prophets, check out krill. Krill is ‒ or are ‒ like little bitty shrimp, only you won’t find them on any Red Lobster menu. (Thank God) Just on cruises....Get it? Well they might actually be at Red Lobster INLAND (meaning no ocean for miles) They might be there, but you won’t find them, because they’re so tiny. In fact, if you’ve been to the beach lately, they might be on you right now! HA And hell if he is taking me to the beach and he won't b on me either! Can you visualize this? But he looks like Johnny Depp?

Become a member to create a blog