Why  

rm_PastingAway 55M
90 posts
10/10/2005 2:40 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Why


Why is life so damn difficult? Why is it that things get more difficult as we age? I find that life is a series of "misadventures" that shape us into who we are.

I remember being a teenager and I would see the 40 year old guys, walking in a store, and I would make fun of them. And now i'm one of them.

What the hell happened? Last thing I know I was that teenager who seemingly had the world at his feet -- I look up now and I find that it has just about passed me by.

Admittedly the 80's was shitty for me, the first part was a disaster and the second and third parts were spent in a haze, I can barely remember them. The 90's weren't much better, another decade spent alone and thrown away with no purpose to it.

Now it's the 2000's and while my life HAS changed in a few good ways, there still is this underlying thought that the best years of my life were wasted. Why could I not find a great woman then like I have now? Think of the good times shared, the memories ... it was all I ever dreamed about having and for some unknown reason it was denied me. Now, in the 2000's, I am having other issues that are taking away from the happiness I have found and i'm pissed off about it.

Life is cruel. Life is unfair.

I am very happy with the lady in my life, she is awesome in every way. But all I can think about are those years (decades) spent alone unwanted. Those years can never be replaced, and that really sucks ass.

And I ask that familiar question ....

Why?

MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/11/2005 12:54 am

Because you're a late bloomer? Some people don't come into themselves until they're older. Grandma Moses didn't paint until her children were grown.

Now, what's her name? Where is she from? Where did you meet her? How long have you known her? What are her intentions with you? When do I get to ask her all of this in person?


rm_PastingAway 55M

10/11/2005 7:05 pm

Oh great, you are comparing me to Grandma Moses.

I am not a "late bloomer", more like no-one noticed me for who and what I am until now.

As for the other things you ask, they will remain private, as they should be. They were not the point of my blog post. No, you will never meet her, nor will you ever see me again in person either. I told you, i'm done meeting people and attending parties. I've seen enough cringing for one lifetime, thank you. THE ABSOLUTE LAST PLACE I WOULD EVER BRING SOMEONE WHO MEANS SOMETHING TO ME IS AN AFF_ PARTY OR GATHERING OR EVENT. Hell, i'm embarrassed that I even am on this cheesy site in the first place. While I am not saying this about everyone, there are too many "plastic people" whom I have no desire to ever see again.

Too many people who are so sweet and kind in chat turn out to be plastic, superficial backstabbers or cringers in person. No more for me.


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/14/2005 7:48 am

You know, I still have your London souvenir here. What am I supposed to do with it? And do NOT say what I know you're dying to say.


songbird66 45F  
24 posts
10/20/2005 12:28 am

"I am very happy with the lady in my life, she is awesome in every way. But all I can think about are those years (decades) spent alone unwanted. Those years can never be replaced, and that really sucks ass."

OK, at the risk of sounding like a perky, positive, glass half full type of person...why not enjoy the long over due fruits of despair? Many people will never share any part of their lives with a woman/partner they feel is "awesome in every way". Enjoy it...now shut your bitch hole !!!!!


rm_PastingAway 55M

10/20/2005 1:20 am

MissAnn, I am truly touched that you actually got me a souvenir from London. I have asked that you mail it to me, I seem to remember you not only knowing my address, but giving it to several people without even telling me. Make it up to me and send me the souvenir and I will make sure I kiss your ass real good for it, here and in the *GASP* chat room...

Knowing you won't do that so you can hold it over my head, I guess I'll never be receiving it.

Besides, the last time I actually went to Sams you didn't bring it, because you were not sure i'd be there. So technically you should have already given it to me if you intended me to have it.

Send it to me if you can / want. I'd love to receive it.


rm_PastingAway 55M

10/20/2005 9:53 pm

songbird, true enough, and well-said.

You remind me of Kathie Lee with all that perky, glass half-full stuff

Make no mistake, I DO enjoy it, to the fullest. It is the one thing in my life that I actually do enjoy.

As for my bitch hole, make me!


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/24/2005 1:21 pm

Hey Pasting! You guilted me enough! Keep an eye on your mail. I hope it gets to you in one piece. (You know, I still have stuff I haven't mailed out yet, to other people. God, I'm lazy.) I hope you like it.


rm_PastingAway 55M

10/24/2005 7:11 pm

MissAnn, that is very kind of you. I appreciate the gesture. This is a proud moment for me. I actually guilted you into submission? Are you sure it's not just to keep me from continually proving that I am your master in the bad song department?

Seriously, thank you. I will announce when it arrives. Believe me, after all this time, it will be an EVENT ! I look forward to receiving it.


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/25/2005 12:21 pm

Pasting, I was holding it over your head to get you to parties. Alas, it wasn't to be. And you're the master in the bad song department? What, did my last comment in that thread not post? If it did, you would see that I am the queen of the bad songs!


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