Our top story for the night. Porn O'Graphy is dead at the age of 69!  

rm_LoyalCumpany 46M
2036 posts
5/29/2006 10:11 pm

Last Read:
10/18/2007 6:42 pm

Our top story for the night. Porn O'Graphy is dead at the age of 69!

As our earlier reports stated, Porn O'Graphy is now dead. We go live to our reporter on the scene, S. Kinflicks!

Thank you, Sofful Ashet. I am here at the tragic scene, where Porn O'Graphy was shot in the eye by an errant "money shot" from a loaded weapon. Imal Argecock has been taken into custody for the shooting, and awaits formal charges in the County Jail.

There is already a candlelight vigil being held in honor of Porn, but it hasn't been easy to get many details. The witnesses we did mange to speak to said this...

OK, it's game time! My challenge to you is to think up your own "porn name" and comment to me YOUR version of events. Have some fun with this.



I am JoJo the Circus Boy!


rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
5/29/2006 11:03 pm

Awwwww, Im so hot, its like 70 degrees here.......oh ok.

Chipper McNipples. Although too hot at the moment to speak, she did manage to tap out "Its so tragic" in morse code with her rock-hard nips on a tabletop.


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 9:55 pm:
Chipper McNipples has been cleared of any wrongdoing. Evidence points to the divots in the tabletop, and she was tied to the chair in the piledriver position when police arrived.

rm_gerson42 52M
2419 posts
5/30/2006 12:22 am

Why do I feel like Im in a tent, in the backyard with my pre-teen friends, telling jokes.
ger


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 9:56 pm:
Because yer hiding in a tent now, seeing that the Suns have evened the series>

rm_gerson42 52M
2419 posts
5/30/2006 12:28 am

Oops, didnt see the challenge down below in the larger orange letter. Ok, lets see.

Limp Dick from 1st Cherry Street reported what appeared to be an assault in progress. When police arrived Eric Shawn was found toying with Moist Muffin in what was determined to be a false projection.
ger


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 9:57 pm:
And due to the fact Moist Muffin's vagina was stretched to the width of an unused roll of paper towels, the police have cleared them both.

MrNuttz05 49M

5/30/2006 12:52 am

Gotta go with 'D. Hughes'...
It was given to me during my 1st production


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 9:59 pm:
We may have a suspect. He has evaded the question and is only giving his name, production rank, and pounding his chest like a gladiator.

sexymamma662003 31F

5/30/2006 1:19 am

umm i dont know what my name would be. you can pick it out for me

~sexy~


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:00 pm:
Another suspect who refuses to even give her name. This one must be handcuffed.

rm_truedom2 55M
663 posts
5/30/2006 2:24 am

My name is Stu Pidasso and I saw the whole thing....it was just horrific....protein stains all over the place...


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:01 pm:
An eyewitness has come forward, but not pointing an appendage ay anyone.

Satyr48 67M
1773 posts
5/30/2006 3:12 am

Dick Head was working on his car with his wife, G.Eve Head. G.Eve went to the hardware store to get Dick's tool to hold the drive shaft. She asked the counter guy, Claude Bals, "Do you have any vises?", to which he replied...
"What did you have in mind?"
"Just one big enough for Dick' shaft, and put in a gift card saying 'Love, G.Eve Head'"
When she got it home, Claude Bals' vise was plenty big enough for Dick Head and G.Eve Head was happy to do it for his big shaft.

Pleasing women in unbelievable ways for 45 years...
You could be next...


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:03 pm:
*rtrying to write this all in the witness report*

Does all this mean you saw it or didn't see it?

bipolybabe 54F

5/30/2006 7:38 am

Cherry Ontop, a witness at scene of the crime, said, sobbing, "I didn't believe he was going to shoot. I screamed for him to stop. And then he did it anyway."

Shaking her head sadly, she added, "What a damn waste!"

BPB

Check out my blog Bi-Poly-Babe for more sensual, sexual pleasure!


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:04 pm:
According to unnamed eyewitnesses, we hear you tried to dive and catch the shot in your mouth?

SweetDarlinAngel 39F
2996 posts
5/30/2006 12:46 pm

totally stumped on a "porn name". I'm thinking either Lai Midown or Creemie Pusie... you decide

I hid, I must admit, I missed it all. I hate violence. I hid as soon as it all started.

~Angel


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:05 pm:
M'lady, are you telling us you have more than one screen name?

FunFlirty4u 45F

5/30/2006 4:56 pm

I already have one, Greedy Gretchen. I once heard somewhere that if you take your first pets name and add that to the street where you grew up you would get your porn name. Try it.


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:07 pm:
Greedy Gretchen? Is that why we had such a hard time collecting evidence of the shot?

Satyr48 67M
1773 posts
5/30/2006 11:12 pm

My wife would probably name me
Al Wayshard or Will Drilugud

I would definitely name her
Annie Dickldo or Rammie Reallyhard

Pleasing women in unbelievable ways for 45 years...
You could be next...


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:23 pm:
Two more suspects, not giving statements. Waiting for your lawyers?

bipolybabe 54F

5/30/2006 11:44 pm

    Quoting bipolybabe:
    Cherry Ontop, a witness at scene of the crime, said, sobbing, "I didn't believe he was going to shoot. I screamed for him to stop. And then he did it anyway."

    Shaking her head sadly, she added, "What a damn waste!"
LoyalCumpany replies on 5/30/2006 10:04 pm:
According to unnamed eyewitnesses, we hear you tried to dive and catch the shot in your mouth?

BiPolyBabe replies:

As a journalist, I'm sure you'll want the objective truth, as follows:

Cherry Ontop leapt in the air, made the catch and then fell. Landing on her plump round butt, she did not break any bones. As a natural sexual athlete and fan of various forms of stupidball, she brushed herself off and announced, "No harm. No foul," as she exited the crime scene.

BPB

Check out my blog Bi-Poly-Babe for more sensual, sexual pleasure!


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:24 pm:
OK, we'll clear you of all charges, as soon as you spit in this cup. We still have our procedures...

LustyTaurus 48M  
21253 posts
5/30/2006 11:49 pm

OK I know what happened...Porn O'Graphy was not shot by Mr. Argecock afterall. As it turns out, he was suffocated by an overeager Miss Lovestogoontop. Her agressive grinding while sitting on his face, combined with her involuntary vaginal squirting proved to be more than Mr. Porn O'Graphy could handle. I, Voy Euristic, saw the whole thing, and will testify as such in front of Judge Notgettinany at the trial.


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:25 pm:
That's all well and good, but how does that explain the rapid and deep insertions in O'Graphy's skull?

sensually_4ever 42M/F

5/31/2006 5:45 pm

my porn name....

LickinToes, in Honor of my new profile pic

as for where i was at the seen of the crime? I am absolved of all wrongdoing simply cause I was stalking my favorite blogger, cMEcum...

He had just allowed mer to catch him and we were fornicating til our eyeballs fell hence being unable to see the scene of the crime...

Though it was next door, I do believe the cacophony of moans. squeals and howls lead me to believe that mr. O'graphy went down shooting...

This is all I know.. and I plead the fifth on the rest of the proceedings

toeLicks


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:27 pm:
Hmm... sounds like you may be covering something up. Changing your picture ID right after the shooting?

Smooth_GaL 34F
424 posts
6/1/2006 3:15 am

BodyShots here...I was next door when it happened sadly i wasn't able to see much as I was kinda busy giving some tequila body shot to someone... Porn was a dear friend as he enjoyed his shots more then anyone would ever know... Sighs he will be very deeply missed by many .....

{=}Smooth{=}


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:29 pm:
Yet another innocent. A few reenactments might be needed here.

Bring in the Tequila!

MOfunNOWWOW 55F

6/1/2006 2:28 pm

Ramadoll Inn just shaking her head at the state of affairs in this country.


MOMO
just a squirrel trying to get a nut


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:29 pm:
Is that all you would be shaking?

Balibabe19 41F

6/1/2006 4:40 pm

Hornay McDoomee came and came again to try and attract the attention of investigators, but as typical men their repeated attempts to stick it in the wrong hole of questionable intentions came up with nothing. Hornay in a last act of exasperation threw herself naked in front of the officers..only to land on a protuding sword thereby piercing her. She was met with the indifference of the officers which glanced down and commented "Someone call the Coroner's office...we may have another cum shot victim and this bitch is smiling too...!!"


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:30 pm:
Our officers swear they only found one victim. They mentioned nothing of a female piercing victim. Cover up maybe?

Hippink 35F
4499 posts
6/1/2006 8:27 pm

Bunny Fukalot.
I swear he was alive when I last hopped on him!
He had a smile on his face when I was bending over to pick up my panties... I smiled and waved between my legs at him before I hopped out the door.
I didn't see anything!
Hippie XXX


rm_LoyalCumpany replies on 6/1/2006 11:31 pm:
Bunny, let's see the position you were in when you waved good bye...

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