Discontent in Blogland..  

rm_Kissmystuff 61F
2665 posts
3/18/2006 3:00 pm

Last Read:
3/24/2006 10:38 am

Discontent in Blogland..

ยง Over the past few months I've enjoyed being here..doing my blog and occassionally responding to emails I receive. I came to AdultFriendFinder mainly to fill a void..since prior and after surgery..I no longer get out and about as in the past. This site gave me a way to continue to interact with others and not feel alone. I'm a standard member..and this gives me whatever access I need or want.
I'm pleased whenever I see that someone has visited my blog and even more so when they leave a comment.

However...more and more I seem to be running across comments on some of the blogs about the slot machine..and people who should not be there. Or resentment expressed because someone has not been here very long but yet...there they are..appearing in the slots..and being listed as one of the most popular blogs. This reminds me of the "CRABS IN A BARRELL" complex. A crab makes it's way to the top and just when it's about to escape and make its way out..the other crabs pull it back in.

Personally..I don't care about someone being in the slots..even if they haven't been here very long. Would I feel differently if I were a paying member? NO..I'd feel exactly the same way. I'm sure you've heard that saying.."water finds it's own level". If your blog is good..people will read it. If you're new and want more people to read it..visit their blogs..let them know you exist. There's over 100,000 blogs on this site!!! Who's got time to read them all..let alone know about each and every one?

In regards to a specific one or two peoplesuddenly catapaulting to the top..well..one thing to consider..is the image constantly pushed by western culture. That image is namely the blonde..dumb..sex pot..and the subliminal message that she is the most likely to fulfill a man's wildest dreams. Not everyone has "peeped" to the fact that it's an illusion. While there are others who have reached a level of maturity to understand..it's not the looks or outward appearance that counts for the most. Don't misunderstand me..I'm not saying that blondes are necessarily any dumber or sexier than anyone else..it's just that it's the image that's been pushed. If you say and show something often enough..many will come to believe it. In this regard...the media..and the defenders of the culture of commercialism..have done their job well. And there are those males..who have fallen prey. Let's face it..if you are male..you can probably think of many times when you've fallen for it yourself.

I ask...what's the point in getting upset..feeling resentful. It makes no sense to me. You don't have to change what you do if you're happy with your blog..if you make it interesting..and rewarding for people to take time from their busy lives to read it.

The majority of people who visit me at my blog..seem to be intelligent..well spoken individuals..who I hope will continue to come. But it's up to me to continue to be intelligent and well spoken to make them want to come.

In the meantime..how does being resentful and negative help the cause? How does personal attacks on individuals help? The CEO of AdultFriendFinder has asked for suggestions for making the site better.

I've always believed that if a person has a problem..it's best to talk about it with those who can resolve it..but in a constructive..positive way. It can only make a community stronger.



ArgosPlumyKooky 45F
3902 posts
3/19/2006 7:01 am

you are very correct about instant popularity going to the sterotype of sexy. i had not conciously noticed this. interesting.

rm_emerald6912 48M
545 posts
3/19/2006 8:07 am

Very good post, and I couldnt agree more. I read the posts i find interesting, whether that person is shown on the slots or not is of no relevance.

digdug41 49M

3/19/2006 8:43 am

you have definitely gotcha skull cap screwed on tight and its very refreshing to see I try my hardest to avoid all the nonsense coz its nonsense and theres no way to pick sense from the non so I keep it moving your a wonderful writer kiss I am definitely feeling you

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
3/19/2006 8:50 am

I was blonde for five years (my natural color being deep auburn) and I was treated differently at first by people I met. Its so funny how my hair affected their response.

KarezzaMagick 64M
165 posts
3/19/2006 12:12 pm

[color red[ Dear Ms Stuff

Thanks for the insightful post.

Personally, I care "squat" about the slots, if by that you mean the "Most Popular Blogs" listed on the main Blog page here at AdultFriendFinder. I'll add that one must start somewhere; I recall finding your blog via one of the blogs in the "slots."

I've read some blogs from the "slots," but my gut instinct is that if too many people prefer something, maybe that's because it's "good," but also overly bland or in some way too broad-spectrum for me.

I've been trying to read new blogs and comment on them if they are interesting. I recommend that anyone who reads these words do the same.

I'm very new here and my interest is meeting and sharing with interesting and interested people.

Do you think that owners of the most heavily visited and commented upon blogs still have time to read, think about, and write relevant responses to the comments they receive, or to read the blogs and posts of others?

As far as seniority goes, all I can say is BS! Water does find its own level. In blogging, those with something worth reading will eventually be discovered by those who want to hear it... but they can probably stimulate their popularity by seeking out kindred spirits who are not in the "top ten," or whatever. This just takes a bit of time and effort, and ought to be quite pleasant.

I didn't realize you'd had surgery that makes it difficult for you to get out and about. I hope that won't be a lasting condition. So far, your writing is some of the more interesting and insightful I've come across on the 'Net, over the years. You certainly have strong opinions and beliefs, but you are also gracious about how you express them.

blueguy1051 60M

3/20/2006 11:11 am

Gee, I wonder who you're talking about ... Seems to really rile people up, doesn't it?

Since everyone was talking, I did some looking, and the production by that young lady is truly impressive. I'd have to write day and night to post so much, plus the magazine output, etc. If I have the choice of being the most popular blogger, or really getting out and meeting people, I guess I'll have to forego the fame and glory.

docdirk 47M

3/20/2006 8:38 pm

How dare you use common sense and rationality in your argument? LOL!!!

Ah, Its you again, Your Angel Feathers and your Blood Stains...

rm_FreeLove999 46F
16127 posts
3/24/2006 5:07 am

i think some people just like having something to get in a frothy about... and they are afraid of losing their positions of power ... frankly, i like some of these people, but their frothies are starting to get on my nerves and i'm losing respect for them.

there are some top-blogging issues that also annoy me (one in particular) but i am not going to state them in public (in fact, i think the only person i've stated them to is my husband); it just smacks of bad grace.

i don't care want the ranking system is -- i think i would be up and down the list regardless, cos i write a good blog but at times am not inspired, but i do think it is good to have some system, because most of the top bloggers are there for a reason, and it helps newbies get a feel for what's out there. i have been in blogland for more than a year -- top-bloggers come and go, but some have shown stamina and staying power, and i think they deserve some credit for it.

[blog freelove999]

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