Another skirmish in the war of the sexes  

rm_Kingcat4U2 65M
1606 posts
5/21/2006 3:45 pm

Last Read:
5/22/2006 1:21 pm

Another skirmish in the war of the sexes

One of my buddies called me this weekend to touch base with me, see how things were going. We exchanged the usual BS before he got down to the main reason for calling. The girl. This really hot chick he had met, curves out of this world, very pretty and extremely friendly. We had talked about her once before, when he filled me in on all the details of meeting her and what had transpired. I can tell he is very interested in her. He even asked her out once, which was really huge for him. He has a steadfast rule about not asking customers out and he is very meticulous about obeying this rule. So for him to break this rule meant that she had to be pretty special. He offered to take her to a very nice restaurant, very upscale.

She turned him down, declined his offer, which was all well and good, because he was cool with that.
She was afraid they might jeopardize their professional relationship, which was important to her. A valid reason, totally acceptable and understandable with no hint of anything else. My buddy is a tall, muscular fellow, smiles alot and is very easy going, fairly articulate, just the kind of guy most women like. So, so far everything is completely above board and normal, right?

Wrong. The next time he sees her, she makes the statement to him that she went to the restaurant that he offered to take her to, to see if she could catch him "hanging around". This is not a bar and grill, not the kind of establishment that you go to for drinks or to "hang out". So he was a little bit taken aback my this, struck him as a strange statement to make. He then drops in on another business, where the owner, of all people, tells him that he had a conversation with the same girl and she told him that my buddy "was crazy about her and didn't have eyes for any other woman". Now, he's in shock.

He tells me that he never said anything like that to her at all, nothing that could be even remotely construed in that fashion. And I believe him, I've known him for a long time and he's a straight shooter. Besides, this is job related and I know for a fact that he is only going to be strictly professional. Women are one thing, work is another, and he is not going to do anything that's going to jeopardize the job in the least.
So of course, I give him all the standard lines about how he needs to limit contact with this girl because she just doesn't seem to be right in the head. Tell that he's lucky he found this out now, before he actually got involved with her in any way ,shape or form. Just be nice, if you come into contact with her, but maintain a professional tone and deflect any personal comments or suggestions.
And he agrees with me wholeheartedly. Knows how lucky he is, can visualize the hazards of letting someone into his life that may be a potential loose cannon.

But he can't stop talking about her. In amazing detail, the kind of detail a guy can only get into when he is really focused on something. I can't help but feel that the whole conversation was an exercise in futility. He's the proverbial moth fluttering around the light, wanting it so bad, can't tear himself away. Knowing intelectually that the odds of this having a satisfactory conclusion are just about zip. But emotionally, it's full speed ahead, charge into the fray, damn the torpedos, even though he alledgely "knows" better. Sometimes, we can be such damn fools.

I just know I'm going to hear more about "this girl". I just hope I don't wince too much when he tells me the next story.

PineyFolks 59M/59F

5/21/2006 4:27 pm

All you can do is listen and be there as his friend. Maybe it will help. Good luck


rm_Kingcat4U2 65M
2799 posts
5/21/2006 5:40 pm

    Quoting PineyFolks:
    All you can do is listen and be there as his friend. Maybe it will help. Good luck

That's the basic game plan, for sure. I'll be there to commiserate with him, but you just hate see a friend get burned. But we're guys and we often do stuff we get to live to regret. It will be a good boy's night out if nothing else.

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