Why I joined AFF  

rm_Jstme6170 46F
742 posts
9/3/2006 10:10 am

Last Read:
10/4/2006 5:50 pm

Why I joined AFF

The following is in response to [A Song for misterEd0950 partygirl3869] who gave me both a truth and a dare!

Addressing the truth: I joined AdultFriendFinder the first time in 2004 because my SO and I were having problems and I was looking to see if he was on a variety of personals sites. I had the profile deleted a few months later because I couldn't find him here and we had worked through our issue (yes, it was only one: she was a bisexual blonde he met at work).

After the issue was resolved, we were closer than ever (and still are), but in late 2005, I found out she had contacted him again, so I joined a variety of sites again, afraid the nightmare was beginning again. After a few days I decided the direct route was best and confronted him. He put my mind at ease and I turned the profile off, but did not delete it this time.

I turned the profile back on this July after we returned from vacation together. While we were on vacation, the subject of fantasies came up in bed one night. He mentioned that he had always wanted to experience a menage a trois. Having been in the situation once before in my early twenties, I decided to try to make his fantasy a reality, and to broaden my own sexual experience by looking for a woman who was bi-sexual. (My early experience was all about the man we were with; I have never had an encounter with a woman-ever).

As soon as I turned the profile back on, I had a variety of men contact me, so I altered my profile to read, "No Men." Within a week, a very sexy couple contacted me and wanted to meet us, so I let my partner in on the surprise. At first he was angry, because he was unaware of what I had done, but the anger changed to curiousity rather quickly. We decided to meet the couple with no expectations on either side, and did. They were very attractive, and lots of fun to go out with, but I had been corresponding with the wife and she knew my SO's reservations, so everything was kept rather casual. At the end of the evening, Kachalka had made a decision. He was not interested in swapping with a couple, and neither was I. What we wanted was a single woman to join us. (Boy is that hard to find!).

The couple we met was very understanding and we still keep in contact with them (having made new friends), but our hunt has been solely for another woman. Unfortunately, we can't seem to agree when we do get a nibble, so we have pretty much resigned ourselves to letting go of the fantasy. Or at least not actively looking. If it happens, it happens, if not, oh well. We have fantastic sex already and have become even closer throughout all of the experiences above. He knows about (and can check) all of my e-mail, postings, etc. I hide nothing from him, even my little flirtations!

I think we probablly would have deleted both of our profiles if during the search I had not discovered the AL and become hooked. Of course that addiction gradually led me here. Most of the time, I look at it like a harmless game; he and I have actually talked about that aspect of the site. I guess when Isthisbetter4u accused me of being a player, he was right! (at least in the illicit aspect of the word!)

Wow, talk about a long answer to a short question! Well, at least you know a little bit more about me, now. (Probably more than you cared to! LO

angelofmercy5 58F
17881 posts
9/3/2006 1:57 pm

I enjoy getting to know you a little better. Why don't you come on over and dance naked with us at LAST CAMPFIRE OF THE SUMMER! And be sure you at least say "hi" so we know you're there!

rm_aboutme66 51F
6047 posts
9/4/2006 11:45 pm

This is a great way to get to know you. Like a wise woman said to me once...... what we started out here for is not why we stay.

Someday is today.

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