How Will I Ever get through this without pulling my hair out?  

rm_Fasanateme2 60F
1 posts
7/24/2006 7:35 pm

Last Read:
7/27/2006 12:00 pm

How Will I Ever get through this without pulling my hair out?

I have been a swinger for about 5 years now. At first it was fun exciting, able to explore any aspect of your sexual nature. Now because of my trials and tribulations I am in transition, finding I am really unable to go into any relationship without becoming over emotional. I do not want to share that person with anyone i want them all to myself. Not like a swingers lifestyle. Not sure what all my emotional needs or wants are at this time. I usually end up forgetting my needs and focusing on the other person. Well........I am worn out, tired, and unable to give unless there is emotion attached. This tends to spark my passion that is deep within me. I LOVE to give but like most woman,I LOVE to receive. Am I selfish for this? I have been in many situations of sexual exploration, and have enjoyed most of it. I guess i want to be someones whole world, excusing me for some of the stupid silly things I may do, not get upset If I say something that might irritate them willing to let those little things go, pass, cause they are so trivial, because it really doesn't matter. The true focus should be on all the right things about that person not focus on the bad things, see the whole picture, not just the frame.

tjnele 61M
12 posts
7/24/2006 9:46 pm

I feel your "pain". Sex without an emotional attachment seems so empty. Having said that, I am much more a giver than a receiver. I can please my partner without that attachment, but really like to feel there is something there before I can truly "let go" (that means having screaming orgasms for myself). Although I do tend to get very excited if my partner is enjoying what I am doing to / for her!
There is nothing wrong with "wanting to be someones whole world", but my experience has been it is very difficult. I am either "too clingy", "too attached", blah blah blah, "need to get a life." Is it a bad thing to want to be so devoted? So caring? So passionate that simply holding hands while walking brings a smile to your face?
"Silly things?"
Life is too short.
I love your analogy... "see the whole picture, not just the frame"

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