Can you be too local on AFF?  

rm_Deejee73 43M
14 posts
1/2/2006 11:36 am

Last Read:
5/31/2006 2:59 pm

Can you be too local on AFF?


Now it may be just me... either my shattering visage or paltry lines in initial email contact (or perhaps both) but I have noticed a particularly recurring theme when it comes to ladies on AdultFriendFinder who live near me.

You would have thought that the whole point of AdultFriendFinder is to find someone near you, with whom you are compatible, and in the company of whom good times could be had. But can you be too geographically close?

As I like to do, I did a search when I first signed up again to see who was new, who was still around. I discovered a profile on my re-entry to the world of AdultFriendFinder from a delicious lady who lives not 10 minutes from my door and, indeed, lives in the village where I grew up.

Naturally, I thought I had struck gold and tried to turn on my most charmingest smile for the email that winged its way to her swiftly. I sent her a wink (as always though I still don't get the point of these wink things) and a network invitation too (because the pic of my face can be found there by network members). The network invitation was declined and no email came in answer.

I log on this evening and there amongst the highlighted list of 'who's online now' is the same lady. What is more she is on IMC. What an opportunity I think - I try to communicate that I live nearby in the paltry amount of text AdultFriendFinder allow you to try and initiate an IMC conversation, cross my fingers and pray to the gods in maroon and gold to look kindly on me.

The request to chat was declined.

Now it may be that my timing was bad. Maybe she was just getting all steamed up with another of my male colleagues on this site. Maybe she was about to log off... but maybe, just maybe, no winks would be coming my way despite our proximity.

So, can you be too close? Is there a limit at which people say no. I guess they may think that too close is the risk of running into this guy while out doing my shopping, with no make-up on and a pair of unflattering grey trackies adorning my bum' or even a more simple 'no, I might run into him when I'm out with my partner/husband'.

I can remember chatting briefly to a girl on another chat network which went really well until she discovered I lived on the other side of the same town in Kent. At which point, she uttered an expletive and logged off.

Maybe it's just me but since I'm the eternal optimist on my own ability to impress the opposite sex, I'll assume that it is possible to be too geographically close on a network like this.

Seereeoslee 36F

1/2/2006 12:06 pm

Don't know what their problem was - I love it when I can be to a guy (or he can come to me) within half an hour. Other side of town - awesome. Halfway across town - even better. Damn, if my upstairs neighbor weren't involved, I'd love to hook up with him.

Sometimes a girl needs more than proximity tho. I get 20 - 50 emails a day, so it's the ones with the nice pics and the catchy subjects that I respond to. And long emails. I love reading a couple of nicely written paragraphs about a guy and what he likes to do (both in and out of the bedroom). Nothing sexier than charm.

I wish you luck my friend.


zoopc42 47M

1/2/2006 12:35 pm

this has happened to me not once but seven times. there are many that live close. a few that even have thier pictures up and they are pretty hot. however I have got turned down by them. all different types to so i figure it must be proximity. maybe the gossip of actions is enough to scare them away


rm_art_persists 51M
1789 posts
1/2/2006 12:48 pm

Doubt it has anything to do with distance. If proximity was our main reason to hook up, I'd be doing it with my neighbours....


MissKittyNip26 106F

1/2/2006 1:06 pm

Hmm.. yeh, that's odd to me too. I definitely want someone CLOSE to me! I get excited when I see that someone is "0 miles" away from me. Then I know it's possible to get spontaneous/when I'm horny and wet sex.. not planned or have to wait for it sex.


Vampiremona 44F
1 post
1/2/2006 1:59 pm

I do think that people are afraid of running into some they know. They don't want word to get out that they are kinky because of kids or family.


rm_Deejee73 43M

1/2/2006 3:10 pm

Thanks for the encouragement one and all... although I was kinda hoping people might agree with the need for distance and thus make me feel better about my rejection

Seereeoslee - when I'm next in New York on business, I'll give you a shout and try my charmingest.


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