What do I do when I have more sex drive than my partner?  

rm_CaliMtnSnake 29F
2 posts
7/15/2006 9:56 am

Last Read:
7/20/2006 4:33 pm

What do I do when I have more sex drive than my partner?

I care about my boyfriend dearly and I love him a great deal. Our personalities click, our chemistry is great, we're both super nerds, and we're both crazy about each other.

But I like to have sex more. A lot more.

I'm horny all the time; and I realize that men can't have sex as often as a woman can because they have to wait a while before being able to get it up again after blowing their load once. But I can't help but get so frustrated and angry when I'm more aroused than normal and he isn't in the mood. I know that he is attracted to me a great deal and I know that it has nothing to do with the way he feels about me; he just doesn't need to have sex as often as I do. I am trying to adjust to this, but it is difficult. Since he's the first sexual relationship I've ever had (he is not my first sex partner, but the first man I've had sex with on a constant basis) I struggle through trying to figure out how to deal with things when I am unsure, or when I feel like I'm being irrational.

And see, I am being sort of irrational, because we have sex once a day, or once every other day. And in 100 degree weather after working over a hot grill, it's completely understandable not to have sex more often than that because of the heat and the sweat that piles up on us whenever we get too close to each other. We can't really have sex unless it's before 10am or after midnight.

So how can I better focus myself not to get mad at him every time he doesn't feel like having sex? I don't want our relationship to break apart simply because I get frustrated that my needs can't always be satisfied. He would not be okay with me taking another sex partner on the side, even if there was no emotional involvement. I've tried to find a woman, but unless he was present every time we hooked up he would count that has cheating as well. I just need to be able to calm my body down more, how do I do that?

(And with toys, what kind of vibrator is a good G-spot stimulator that doesn't put too much pressure on the clitoris?)

rm_PurryKitty2 48M/49F
9753 posts
7/15/2006 11:46 am

Get lots of toys~ The Rabbit is awesome!!!! I am getting a clit pump and hope that works well too!

Purry {=}


rm_csd80 36M
582 posts
7/17/2006 9:03 am

Unless you’re wiling to find a guy that’s more compatible it sounds like you’re stuck with toys. You might try taking up a hobby to distract yourself and focus that sexual energy somewhere else.

By the way, it doesn’t take a super long time for guys to recover. Personally I can be ready to go again in 15 min. Possibly less if I’m particularly turned on. Have him try to lick and cuddle you till he's ready to go again.

Take a look at my [blog csd80]

Sac's Hot Spot has regular meet and greets that are allways fun. It can use some more active members, especially women.

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