Threesomes  

revelinthedance 34M
44 posts
4/11/2006 10:08 am
Threesomes


I'm curious about something. How do you define threesome? I've run into some conflicting definitions on this one.

I realize that the textbook definition would simply refer to it as three people being engaged in a sexual act involving each other simultaneously. Where does one draw the line, though? This may seem strange to others, but let me put forth a couple of examples. I have a friend who decided to immediately share her experience with me when she had what she considered to be her first threesome. When she communicated what it was, my internal reaction was "that wasn't a threesome". What it consisted of was her and two guys but the closest they got to simultaneous sexual engagement was one sucking on her nipples while the other gave her head. I suppose that where my contest of this being defined as a threesome came from that lack of the coinciding penetrative element. My friend has not yet made the foray into anal sex and, at the time she was having problems with her jaw that did not allow for oral sex so, when it got around to the actual intercourse part of things, it was simply the two guys taking turns while the other watched. While there was simultaneous oral activity, simultaneous penetration did not occur. I've been in situations like that before, involving three way kisses, oral sex while the other was making out, and much the same kind of precursor activities that my friend experienced, but I would never classify it as a "threesome".

If a woman is simply being the "centerpiece" of a party and is having sex with multiple men in rapid succession, we differentiate between that being a gang bang or an orgy. When I've had sex with multiple women in the same day, it isn't considered a threesome/foursome/etc.

Still, while some may say that this is simply an egocentric/phallocentric interpretation of the act of a threesome, being that it necessitates the penetrative element, I think this principle applies to threesomes had in any combination (MFM, FMF, MMM, FFF, etc.) If two women take turns on a guy, and this doesn't include activities with each other, is it technically a threesome? It seems that it is a # of distinct sexual acts. If a man is hanging out in a room, one woman enters and gives him a blowjob and positions herself elsewhere in the room while another woman enters and receives oral or has sex with the aforementioned man, would you call that a threesome? It doesn't seem so to me. Certain activities need also be precluded or included from defining a "thresome". If one person is engaged in a sexual action involving the genitals of another, and a third person is concentrating efforts on the ears and neck of the first or second, does that, being that it consists of acts not necessarily tied to sex, constitute a threesome? What then would be the functional definition?

I wrote this as a response to another blog, but later decided to transfer it to my own and add a little to it. I did this for lack of feedback as a comment and also because I ran into a profile for a couple, written by the female half, which stated that she wanted another man to engage in a threesome with her and her male significant other, but she would not allow oral sex or anal sex. Unless this includes double vaginal penetration, I don't see how that is possible under my concept of a "threesome".

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