|Blogs > replicant354 > In an existential quandary....|
A friend of mine who is a nurse sent me this email. It is a list of things that have actually been written on patient's charts at hospitals.
1.She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
some guys have all the luck!
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
see folks this is why trying new positions is a good thing!
3. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
4. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
well the undertaker probably isn't too happy about it either
5. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
x-rated hmm? I would have like to have examined her myself
6. The skin was moist and dry.
urg, I've had nights like this
7. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
Hey wow! That must have been one DOOZEY of a probe!
8. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
something tells me this could be a very pricey laxative...
9. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
Help me on this one! I have no idea what they were even thinking!
10. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
Oh man I would LOVE to see this!
11. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
A new test for kinks prehaps?
12. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
well if the nurse is hot can she join in too?
13. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
well this one speaks for itself LOL
9/3/2005 6:07 am
It was definetly a good start to my day to read those.
9/10/2005 9:28 am
They can get worse, and do. I have seen an actual cause of death being lack of breathing.|
The part that gets me is these are from people who go to school for years spending thousands of dollars for their knowledge and their true wisdom shows through in their writing abilities.