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Limerence from Wikipedia
Limerence from Wikipedia
That special craziness when one has to think of his/her love object has a name: Limerence. Not sure it is good to be in this crazy condition, but it is addicting. Many stars seem to crave this crazy feeling and seek it with a string of new loves..
The concept of limerence stems from the research of Dorothy Tennov, beginning in the mid 1960s. She interviewed and surveyed over 500 people on the topic of romantic love. In doing so, she set out to understand and to quantify that variety of "passionate love" as described in Stendhal’s 1822 classic "On Love" wherein the concept of crystallization was developed:
"This Book is aimed at taming a madness (here called limerence) by learning its habits, identifying its various parts and forms, and hoping thereby to make some predictions about its course. To the degree that these aims meet success, limerence may seem less mad, except, of course for its one most crucial feature, the feature that sets it apart from most other human states: its intrusiveness, its invasion of consciousness against our will."
Tennov, while a professor of psychology at the University of Bridgeport, Connecticut, coined the term "limerence" in 1977, and first published it in her 1979 book "Love and Limerence: The Experience of Being in Love." The word was pronounceable and seemed to her and two of her students to have a "fitting" sound. "Limerent" is the subjective noun as well as the adjective form. The coinages are arbitrary; there is no specific etymology. The word is not completely accepted or found in all current dictionaries, but is nevertheless in use by psychologists and by others discussing romantic relationships.
The concept of limerence itself is not an invention of Tennov; several languages besides English have a special word for this emotion in their vocabulary.
Limerence has certain basic components:
* intrusive thinking about the limerent object
* acute longing for reciprocation
* some fleeting and transient relief from unrequited limerence through vivid imagining of action by the limerent object that means reciprocation
* fear of rejection and unsettling shyness in the limerent object's presence
* intensification through adversity
* acute sensitivity to any act, thought, or condition that can be interpreted favorably, and an extraordinary ability to devise or invent "reasonable" explanations for why neutral actions are a sign of hidden passion in the limerent object
* an aching in the chest when uncertainty is strong
* buoyancy (a feeling of walking on air) when reciprocation seems evident
* a general intensity of feeling that leaves other concerns in the background
* a remarkable ability to emphasize what is truly admirable in the limerent object and to avoid dwelling on the negative or render it into another positive attribute.
Limerent object perception
Crystallization, from Stendhal's 1822 work On Love, is a process in which the limerent object’s attractive characteristics are emphasized and unattractive characteristics given little or no attention, or even seen as attractive. The attributes are not pure inventions; the existing features of the limerent object merely undergo enhancement. Objectively trivial aspects of the limerent object’s appearance or behavior may be seized on and the good qualities endlessly re-visualized in the limerent consciousness. Neutral aspects of the limerent object are perceived as charming and delightful.
No matter what the limerent object does it can be interpreted favorably, at least up to a point. There is an amazing capacity to react positively to deficiencies. The limerent reaction may miss by a wide mark the truly important features or ignore serious problems in the limerent object.
8/17/2006 12:39 pm
Oh gosh - my head hurts now!|
8/17/2006 2:23 pm
There doesn't seem to be a pill I can take for it, does there?|
Check out my blog Bi-Poly-Babe for more sensual, sexual pleasure!
8/18/2006 8:23 am
Love crazy is what I call it. Infatuation and puppy love seem to be the same phenom. Young girls with crushes on the Beatles, or a new teen idol seem to have the same kind of passionate crazy love! |
BPB is there a pill you want to get limerence or to get rid of it? The best way to fall out of love is to dwell on the negative aspects of the former love object, and find a new lover! Like replacing a dead family pet with a new one! Get angry, mourn the old one and then get a new one...