Recovering lawyer  

puntachueca 105M
2534 posts
6/28/2006 4:10 am

Last Read:
6/29/2006 5:38 am

Recovering lawyer


I spent the major part of my life as a lawyer. Did mostly real estate development work and utility stuff. Made a lot of money. Spent a lot of money.

Then pretty much quit.

It got to me that all lawyers ever did was manipulate stuff, and bullshit people.

Joke: Lawyers have two assholes...one of them they speak from.

Decided to become a "healing lawyer". The idea was to do just good things for people. Ran into a 3rd year law student. His reaction..."how are you going to make any money doing only good things?"

Wanted to change the image of my practice. Instead of an eagle or a wolf or a weasel, I made up some business cards with a cute bunny rabbit on them. Gave it to a perspective client. "So…...does that mean you fuck rabbits?" he asked.

Got to thinking about a program for "recovering lawyers". Sort of like the AA 12 step thing. Got a group of lawyers together who wanted to give up their addiction to power and money. Couldn’t agree on how many steps would be needed for the program, and everyone was really stressed out about the amends idea. "I’d have fewer people to apologize to if I had just been a drunk," said one recovering attorney.

Joke: How do you tell the difference between a dead coyote and a dead lawyer on the road? Answer…there’s skid marks in front of the coyote.

This joke was told by the chairman of the Cochise County Board of Supervisors just before they voted on whether or not to hire me to represent them in a lawsuit. I was hired.

Joke: Was about to be introduced at a scientific conference. The host started off explaining there was a crisis in medical research. "Animal rights people are demanding no more testing drugs on Animals. The researchers have a problem...how to find some living thing that they could experiment on with potentially fatal results that the Animal rights folks wouldn’t protest about, a living organism that would generate no love or sympathy from lab workers, but was similar enough to a human to generate valid results." The host pointed to me..."We’ve found what we’re looking for...lawyers."


I should note...truth...that my primary care physician is a veterinarian.

In my new career I ran a sewer system and a garbage collection system. As soon as I started, I offered to go out on a garbage collection route. The guys were laughing..."he knows how to throw garbage around."

But now I can claim to be honest about what I do...I deal with shit.

VATraveler1948 68M

6/28/2006 4:39 am

I'm glad that you came to your senses before there was permanent damage.


puntachueca replies on 6/28/2006 4:52 am:
Guess that depends on the meaning of "permanent"...I was involved in developing something likem 100,000 homes...a sea of rooftops.

readytolay_3
(What the fuck is this shit..?? *rolls eyes*)
105F

6/28/2006 4:50 am

Confirming that they are full of SHIT....Ready

Ready


puntachueca replies on 6/28/2006 5:00 am:
This is probably why I switched to running a sewer utility. Now I'm really dealing with shit.

rm_kalanchoe88 54F

6/28/2006 6:27 am

I have a friend who's a prosecutor for the state attorney's office. I know that part of his job is manipulation, but, in his defense, he's there fighting a terrible system to try to find some justice for the victims (mostly women and children) and trying to keep some of the animals off the streets for the rest of us. He's also a very moral person. Just my opinion, but I think there are some attorneys in the world with ethics. I'm sure you were one of that group.
Kala


puntachueca replies on 6/28/2006 5:29 pm:
I did a stint as a prosecutor. I could not believe the arguments defense attornies would make to try and get their scum clients back on the streets to hurt more people.

catkit13 66F

6/28/2006 7:05 am

know what you mean. since i'm a hippie at heart, i went to law school to "help people." never did get rich, actually am more in debt than most of my former clients! hope that means i'm one of the good guys!


puntachueca replies on 6/28/2006 5:30 pm:
You are!!!!
And you do good stuff for people.

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