puntachueca 105M
2534 posts
7/7/2006 9:11 pm

Last Read:
7/9/2006 5:45 am


Another thing about improv is called "balance".

Each participant should say about an equal one person dominating the conversation, script or whatever.

Have you noticed some people tend to dominate conversations and don't let others get a word in edgewise?

In any relational conversation balance is major important. Each side gets an equal amount of say.

Do you experience balance in your conversations?

catkit13 66F

7/7/2006 10:00 pm

depends on the other person, but i try to listen more than to talk - every day on my way home, i pass a sign that says "don't talk about yourself too much" . . . good advice, i take it to heart

puntachueca replies on 7/8/2006 1:02 am:
This has been very good advice for me since I'm the one that was doing most of the talking....

(What the fuck is this shit..?? *rolls eyes*)

7/8/2006 4:56 pm

I tend to keep shit to my self and then vent later when I'm alone...I have found though I don't always do, that allowing the other person to take the lead lets me get a feel for what their REALLY all about...But then there are those people that just bring the best out of you, for they are giving you their very best to begain with...Ready


puntachueca replies on 7/9/2006 5:41 am:
good thought. Listening is good..learn more faster that way.

SensuousWoman3 55F
3106 posts
7/8/2006 7:10 pm

I do not always experience balance in my conversations---although I don’t always expect to either, at least not at all times. Sometimes the other person needs to be listened to more than I need to be heard. However, I would hope the favor would be returned should I feel the need to heard.

I had a date last weekend that did not have any balance in the conversation. The man was like a rat on acid. He’d ask a question, I’d begin to answer and he’d go on to something else. This happened several times. I’d start to say something, he’d interrupt to interject a braggart-like statement. It was very rude. I was turned off, quietly frustrated and annoyed. It wasn’t that what he had to say wasn’t of any interest, but what do you say we follow those rules we learned in kindergarten? Such as speaking one at a time? At one point I gently asked, “Which question would you like me to finish?” He responded with one of those irresponsible answers, such as, “I had to jump in otherwise I couldn’t get a word in edgewise!” If he wasn’t an ass, he would have said, “I am sorry! I am nervous and didn’t realize I was speaking over you. I’m sorry.” Hell! I thought I was on “The View!”

I was an interpersonal communications major in college with emphasis on non-verbal communication. Interrupting is a huge pet peeve, particularly when it is to bring the conversation back to the other person’s dull pontification. I find communication works really well if I actively listen, patiently, and maintaining eye contact while the other person speaks and they return the same courtesy when I speak.

puntachueca replies on 7/9/2006 5:44 am:
right on!
my ex would ask a question, I'd start to answer, she'd cut in, then when I'd go back to answering the question she'd blow up.
yuck. conversation as war. no fun.
I've come to see that most people are really insecure and their talking is a cloud they hide behind.

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