Hair pulling time...  

pretty_blue_eyes 38F
3045 posts
12/15/2005 10:36 am

Last Read:
8/11/2006 11:50 am

Hair pulling time...


Oh my gosh, I've been so stressed out lately with work. Its gone crazy! Oh my, I think I'm about to pull my hair out. Ugh!

Well, not much is going on with me. Trying to finish up the last 3-4 Christmas shopping. Almost done, and I can't wait. I'm sooooo ready to get some time off from work.

Questions? Comments? Goodddddddddd let's hear them!

Loosetooth 41M
1146 posts
12/16/2005 7:22 am

Having followed your blog I am moved to ask if you are happy and if not when you last were? This blog seems to be an outlet for your negative feelings so I am wondering if you have any happy ones.


TTigerAtty 62M

12/17/2005 10:57 am

pretty_blue_eyes - I've dropped by a few times myself, and I've noticed the tendency described by Loosetooth myself. I hope that you're normally happy and just use your blog to vent!


pretty_blue_eyes 38F
2091 posts
12/18/2005 10:14 am

Wow, never really thought about it before really, but I do suppose this is my main outlet for all my negative feelings. I suppose its b/c I really don't have anyone to talk to about it. I don't really do much as far as going out and having fun. I'm usually always with my child. My husband does though, goes out all the time. I know its not good for him to go out all the time, and I know its not good for me to stay home most of the time either. Its hard to explain though. In order to compensate for my husband going out all the time I think its best if I stay with my son. Even if he does stay the night at a relative's house, I still stay at home. Thats b/c I usually dont' have anyone to go out with.


pretty_blue_eyes 38F
2091 posts
12/18/2005 10:17 am

Oh, and as far as when I was last happy, truly happy, satisfied with what I was doing in my life. I really couldn't tell you. I've never really been "single" and did all the going out and partying. I was dating my husband, then engaged, then married, since I was about 16. I just don't know whats out there....


Loosetooth 41M
1146 posts
12/20/2005 2:35 pm

Will you find out what is out there?


pretty_blue_eyes 38F
2091 posts
12/20/2005 3:48 pm

Thats a very good question...and in all honesty...I can't answer it. I don't know if I will or not and that is sad...truly sad...not to mention pathetic...


TTigerAtty 62M

12/20/2005 4:59 pm

pretty_blue_eyes - If you ever want to talk with someone local about your situation, just keep in mind that I'm a good listener. It seems like you are trying to figure out where you want to go in terms of your relationship with your husband and perhaps you're looking for someone who can make you feel happy again. Go slow and think things through.


Loosetooth 41M
1146 posts
12/23/2005 10:19 am

I do not think that it is pathetic or sad. Most humans feel like that all the time. We just do not talk about it. Look it is fine to feel a bit sad and pathetic. I do not know what you are going through (I have a slim idea but not much) but you need to feel excited about your future. Sometimes that uncertainty can be a blessing and exciting.


pretty_blue_eyes 38F
2091 posts
12/25/2005 7:56 pm

Not to sure how something that is unknown can be a blessing and exciting when one has to care for a child. If it was just me, I'd do it. I would risk it. If I were to fail, it would be just me. Not to sure I could risk something that could hurt my child.

Oh, and by the way, I'm glad you don't know what I'm dealing with. Its not fun nor do I wish it upon anyone. Not even someone I did not like which granted, those I do not like are very few in number, but still!

TT...thank you I do appreciate your offer. Although I kind of have a feeling as to what you might say in response to my situation. Maybe if I hear it enough, it will finally make me act???? *hopeful look*


Loosetooth 41M
1146 posts
12/28/2005 7:23 am

I live in a community which the powers that be deem an unsuitable environment for the bringing up of children. Yet the people jeep having them and, much to the powers that be's annoyance, they keep turning out to be fine examples of human beings (with the odd exception). A child needs little except a warm and loving parent. Sound like bull-shit but it is true. If you are in a situation that you cannot leave because you are scared for your child then I would urge you to think again, also I understand your fears they will be unfounded.

What I am surprised about in this last comment is the very dark tone that you have taken. I thought that you were in a marriage that was failing, you tone has led me to think that you are in some life threatening situation (I am a little worried). So........ perhaps you should find someone that you can talk to about this, as it is either very serious or serious enough for it to eat away at you and make you dark. You have TigerTatty's offer and I now add my own, if this is something that does not appeal then perhaps you need to find someone you can talk to.

Take it easy.


pretty_blue_eyes 38F
2091 posts
1/2/2006 1:06 pm

Well I must add to this post that he has never hit me. Its never gotten physical. At least to the point where he will strike me. He yells, hits walls, cabinets, doors, and tells me that he wants to hit something soooo bad. Its the fact that he will say something along the lines of "I wish I had a rope", "your the reason I'm going to kill myself", and "you will have my death on your hands". Oh, and you want me to kill myself. He doesn't say this in response of my saying I want out. Just when we are fighting. I tell him, if he kills himself, its him that did it, not I.


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