Too Much of Anything...  

pragmaticCTcpl 61M/50F
3614 posts
2/5/2006 3:49 pm

Last Read:
6/25/2006 11:46 am

Too Much of Anything...

Too Much of Anything...Well, Almost Anything.....

So here it is...Sunday, late afternoon...and no blog, yet.

The reason...?

Last night we had a party to attend.

It was one of those “family & friends of family” things that was supposed to be just a nice get together. Hors d'oeuvre’s and drinks.

Well, after not having eaten anything all day, we both KNEW that we shouldn’t drink too much, but ONE of us failed to heed what we BOTH knew.

The hors d’oeuvre’s amounted to:

raw shrimp w/ cocktail sauce, pig’s-in-a-blanket, fried stuffed mushrooms, scallop’s wrapped in bacon, shredded shrimp and mayonnaise (w/ deli bread slices or crackers),
veggies and dip, and a few other unidentifiable spreads (that weren’t tried) to go on the deli bread or crackers.

The drinks were pitcher’s of martini’s that were VERY strong.

Well, one of us hardly filled a very small plate with shrimp, pig’s-in-a-blanket, and mushrooms, and had four (4) large glasses of the martini’s. The other of us filled that very small plate twice, to the point where it was sufficient to qualify as a meal, and had two beers and one soda.

The crowd was a partying crowd, and several of the women were obviously blasted from just having one martini.

Several hours later, everyone (with a very few exceptions), was well-oiled...blasted out of their minds...five-sheets-to-the-wind, with full sails, and, NO anchor’s..!

It was about that time that the one of us who didn’t over-indulge, told the other that, “It’s time to go.” This really was a no-brainer, because while talking to another male party-attendee, the bathroom door opened to reveal four very inebriated women, and the one of us who HAD over-indulged, still squatting on the toilet..!

After a few minutes of almost being incomprehensible while saying good-bye’s, the one of us who over-indulged, managed to walk down the stairs (without falling), bounced off several vehicles, parked in the driveway, and managed to open, enter, and sit in the car.

The ride home was only supposed to take 20 minutes, but about 5 minutes from home, the over-indulged one announced, “I’m going to be sick!”

Now anyone who has been driving along an interstate highway, doing 65 miles an hour, in the passing lane...while it’s pouring rain outside, knows that just pulling over isn’t the easiest thing...or smartest thing...in the world to do.

The next exit was nearby, and fortunately (?) the highway passed overhead of the exit with the shelter of a bridge.

Once sheltered from the pouring rain, the over-indulged one opened the door and proceeded to finish what was started IN the car, 60 seconds earlier.

Once finished, and mouth, chin, and hands were wiped clean, the journey home continued. Of course the sleeves, front of the jacket, pants, and shoes, that had been “baptized,” were not attended to.

The ceremonial “hugging of the Porcelain Princess” continued in the bathroom for some time.

There were no additions to the bed sheets that night.

Upon awakening the next morning, the usual cup of coffee was substituted with ginger ale, for our over-indulged one.

Several more “moments of worship before the Porcelain Princess” ensued, and as penitence, the over-indulged one braved the new day (and the smell) and cleaned and washed the car, followed by the bathroom.

Not having over-indulged in over 25 years, the other of us could only vaguely remember the last episode that was the ultimate convincer to NEVER do that again.

Do descriptive phrases like “my head’s splitting wide open,” “I hate myself,” or, “never again...I SWEAR, never again,” bring forth from the depths of one’s memory just how bad the pain in the head, and gurgling in the stomach was for the over-indulgent one?

As time goes on, will those pledges be honored, or will homage and worship be once again given to the “Porcelain Princess?”

Time will tell.


Become a member to create a blog