|Blogs > poizinusscorp > Downright DysFUNctional|
I'm sure the we are all familiar with the game Battleship, right? You know, the game with the little gray boats and the bright yellow pegs? Well, if not I'll explain: You have two players, one on either side of a pegboard where parts stands up between the players to block the view of their opponent's ship locations. You place your boats anywhere on the bottom portion of your pegboard. Each player takes a turn at calling out a letter and a number to make up a coordinate. The opposing player must then call out 'Hit' or 'Miss' depending on where the 'missile" lands. Both player places a yellow peg in the corresponding place on the grid. The receiving player places one on the lower board while the other player places one on the upper grid to keep track of where they are sending their 'missiles'. Once a player's ship is full of pegs he/she must yell out 'You've sunk my Battleship!'
Have I lost anyone? Okay just to make sure you all are with me, I'm not trying to teach you how to play a childhood game. Actually, it's a metaphor for the way I view my life now. Who saw that coming, huh? I may come across like I have my act together, but truthfully I have no idea what it is that I am doing. My intentions are good...I think! Sure I'm here for sex but, eventually someday I'd like to find happiness with someone I really care about!! Well, who wouldn't? What are all the fun and games for if you can't be happy? So to get to my point...
I've been on here for a few months with some 'hits' and some 'misses'. Well, I met this guy, a Diamond in the Rough you could say. He's sweet, funny, and a hoot to be around. Not to mention an animal in the bedroom. He's so laid back and yet full of energy. So well spoken and yet he has a mind dirtier than mine! I get nervous every time I see him, but I'm completely comfortable around him. Okay, he's just an all around wonderful guy! (Bet you're grinning from ear to ear and your head is completely swollen!) I don't normally compliment guys this much, because I don't like men that are conceited, but he deserves every bit of this. He's truly a rare gem.
I seem to have drifted away from the point again, but thinking about him makes me smile. The truth is...I fucked up!!! I gave too much slack in my chain. Don't get me wrong, I'm far from falling in love (I've been there before and I know how it feels), but I have started to care about him. Right now it's nothing more than a friendly care. The funny thing is: I haven't even known him that long. Does that matter anymore?? I guess not, at least not for me. I guess you're starting to wonder what this has to do with Battleship, huh? I've had my 'misses' and my 'hits' with some really great guys, but this last one really did me in....'You sunk my Battleship!' Whether he realizes this or not he has opened my eyes and has shown me that maybe I am ready to jump back into the dating scene again. I know that I can find something good if only I were to look around a bit. Sure sex is fun, oh absolutely, and I know that I can keep my feelings out of it, I just don't know if I really want to anymore. I've been playing this game for years and I know that I'm good at it, but I've let my guard down and now I'm questioning my motives! A part of me says that I want to be in a meaningful relationship, but the other part of me says 'to hell with that, get laid girl!!!' Maybe the game is too much fun for me, or maybe I'm getting bored? I guess I just need someone exciting enough to keep me in the game, but not too exciting where I want just them. Dilemma, Dilemma! Should I continue to wear my horns or finally put on my halo?? A relationship doesn't seem all that bad to me anymore, but man sex is good!! Oh what is a girl to do?
Any advice for a struggling sexaholic??