Whats love got to do with it?  

phatbbw48103 54F
19 posts
8/11/2005 11:57 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Whats love got to do with it?

Tell me something. Does anyone really know what the word "love" means? Why is it when we r in the "zone"/"moment" we blurt out those infamous words, "i love you"? When does it ever become real love? At what point does become real? How do you know if it is real love? Maybe what your feeling is really lust? And what is "puppy love"? We love our parents, we love our children and we love our friends. But what does it mean to be "in love"? How can we be "in love" with someone and then suddenly we are "out of love" with them? Was it really true love in the first place? How can people just turn love on and off as if it were some kind of knob we turn back and forth? I have also always wondered, how can someone claim their love for another and yet go out and be intimate with someone totally different? What kind of love is that? What is that all about? Can someone really love more then one? Would it be true love if they loved more then one? Is the word "love" used way too often and way to easy? Do we really think about it before we say it? To love or not to love that is the question? Does anyone have the right answers? Or opinions?

rm_luvscurves5 58M

8/13/2005 2:39 pm

The "in the moment" part is easy- I think we are all just "wired" that way. the Human animals we are are driven to get together, to couple, to do what makes babies and continue our species- how could we not feel that deep spirtual connection, the "rightness" and the reward of being our purest and most elemental selves. We are given the "gift" of such intense pleasure and emotion so that we may continue on this earth. The fact that we use birth control to regulate the results does not in any way remove that deep spirituality, or lessen the desire to "do the deed"-
The rest is harder to understand- the part about relationships with others outside of sex. I believe it means what one wants it to mean- and perhaps the only challenge is finding someone who shares the same views.. but what a challenge that is!
Just a few months ago, my wife told me that "she loves me, but isn't sure she was ever in love with me". Aside from being a line from "When Harry met Sally", what kind of crap is that? How do you not know, after 10 years, if you are or are not in love with someone? To me, if you loved once, you love forever- no matter the good , the bad, or the ugly. I feel more sorry for her, being so adrift, that I do for me being the recipient of the news. Would you belive that she worries about "will you still be my friend?" if she leaves? Wonder why she thinks she feels that way.....
Iv'e loved people I probably shoudn't have, and not loved the ones I should have enough. But no Love I ever felt was temporary, even when the person was gone from my life. There's someone I haven't seen in 20 years that I would run away with tomorrow if i could- Yet, I would still love my wife that hasn't stayed in the same bedroom with me for 3 1/2 years if i did run away. Love is that powerful to me.
Clearly, Iv'e not answered many (or any) of your questions- just know that we all live our own version, and that you are not alone in wondering...

lost_boy74 42M

8/16/2005 11:32 pm

My definition of the word is this: a misunderstanding between two fools that when apart from each other are more tolerable. But, I digress. Love is a word that gets used all too often, and tends to cause more hurt than any other of the "four-letter" words out there.

To answer your questions in a nut shell, use it at your own risk, because you never know who might hear it.

beadman40 55M

4/23/2006 1:03 pm

Having experienced it recently . . . for the first time since high school (when I couldn't be sure I had developed sufficient brain tissue to understand it) . . . I thought I'd throw in my two centavos.

If you think it doesn't exist, or that it's lust in disguise, then I can confidently say that you've never experienced it. Many people don't, and unless it works out really well I can't say I don't envy them their ignorance, at least a little.

And we're not talking here about the many other states of affection that can exist between two (or more) people. There is brotherly love, and love of country, the love that some puppies or puppy-ish people can feel for damn near anyone, and the love that two people who are dear friends, lovers, and have been married for years feel for each other. And then there is Love with a capital "L".

When Love (vs. love) comes into your life, you don't wonder whether Love really exists or not, or whether it's Love you're feeling or some sort of chemical reaction. It's there, and as palpable and real as a brick falling on your head. It doesn't take long to develop, it's either there or it isn't, and it has its own agenda which may well not coincide with your best-laid plans. It's one of those experiences that leaves a time stamp on your life, and you find yourself referring, to yourself if no one else, to events as occurring before or after the moment you fall in Love.

If you fall in Love with someone who feels the same, and you have room in your lives for its (considerable) size, then all is well. It may not work out down the road, but if you turn your back on it you'll simply regret it. A lot. If it's unrequited, then hide the guns. You're in for a bad time, and may never recover. If it just can't fit into your life despite the fact that the two of you feel it, good luck. You'll be rearranging things. Hopefully they won't be the equivalent of deck chairs on the H.M.S. Titanic.

I can testify that the feeling itself is a blessing, perhaps none higher nor more pure. Love that is shared is a conduit between two people that joins them in a way that no other allows. You may not really know the person you fall in Love with, but you certainly Know them.

The consequences of falling in Love can be far less entertaining than the feelings. But despite that, I wouldn't lose the experience for the world.

Bon chance,


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