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Women, This Has Got To Stop
Women, This Has Got To Stop
Ladies, be forewarned, I am not going to turn this into a bitch session, but I am going to call you on a couple of those "women's prerogatives" that you like to abuse. Men, site back, grab a cognac and just keep nodding your head.
Ok, so I'm still seeing this lady you've heard me talk about and things are cool. We have mutually come to a decision to have an open relationship where no one is playing the jealousy, "where were you last night?" game. For a moment there I thought God had given me a coupon to heaven. She doesn't yet know about the birthday surprise I have planned for her. (Quick aside: for those who have be contacted in regard to this interlude, get back in touch with me).
In any event, I managed to find a friend and a lover in all of this, so life is good. Well, for the most part it's good. She has been dealing with some non-descript medical issues over the past couple of months and has had to see doctors more frequently than she's comfortable with. The most recent will be an appointment she has scheduled for tomorrow. This is a mildly-invasive test that will require her to undergo sedation (It's like shrooms minus the pretty colors). Well because of this, the doctor's office won't release her unless there is someone to escort her home from the doctor's office.
She asked and I acquiesced, no questions asked (I really have to do something about that Lancelot-complex of mine). Anyway, since her appointment is in the middle of the day, I have to take half a day off of work. Since I have run out of vacation/sick time at the moment, I have to play games with my schedule to make up the time. To make matters worse, it has to be made up this week. So my work schedule looks something like multiplication table of a 9-year old...it's not pretty. Add to the fact that this kills my carpooling into work, which means that I will be taking public transportation (I loathe driving into work). All of this I willingly do and ask nothing in return (I know, I'm hamming it up, but stay with me). Well I get home tonight after working two hours overtime to make up for the time I will miss tomorrow only to get a call from her saying she might not go to the appointment.
YOU WHAT?!?!?! OH NO, YOU ARE GOING TO THIS APPOINTMENT
If I have to put her in a harness, blindfold her, tie her up, and stick a scalpel, several shots of novocaine, and a camera up her ass those doctors are going to see what they want to see. Now some of you laugh because you believe I'm joking. Some of you laugh even harder because you know that I'm not. She wanted to get jokingly indignant with me about what she was going to do. I know it was a joke, but as tired as I am, I am in no mood for jokes.
WARNING!!! WARNING!!! WARNING!!! WARNING!!!
This is where the narrator draws the line. Ladies, what kind of shit is that? Mind you, this is an extreme case, but I have to ask you what in the hell is going on with the last minute decision changes? This goes for everything from food, to music to clothes (ohhhh, don't get me started) to where to spend your time. This shit has got to stop. I can appreciate that there are some serious life-altering decisions out there to be made: Seinfeld or Daman Wayans, Peanut Butter or Cream Cheese, paper or plastic but for heaven's sake just pick one!