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8 Things Women Wish Men Knew About Sex
8 Things Women Wish Men Knew About Sex
Women really do wish men could read their minds, as it would make their lives so much easier. If only you could always touch the right spot, at the right time, with the right pressure... impossible, right? Not entirely.
With a little bit of practice and some reading, you can probably pull it off not just once, but every time you try. Well, almost every time. Read on and learn how to avoid the little mistakes that all add up.
1- Always "break the seal" before putting anything inside her.
If you and your girl are getting hot and bothered, and you want to do anything to her vagina, just make sure that when you touch it, it is with something wet. Always.
Apply your (or even her) saliva to two fingers and gently slide them on the outside of the entrance to her vagina, or spit into your hand and cover the end of your penis. Or both. Yes, she might be going crazy for you, but the wetness may not have reached the outside yet. Whatever you do, don't ever do it dry. Vaginas can be complex, multi-layered things!
Putting anything dry into a woman -- fingers, your penis, toys -- means she has to wriggle around to get her outside lips slippery. Even if this does only take 30 seconds, those 30 seconds of dry discomfort take her mind off how good everything else feels. It is a turn-on for her to feel "wet at first touch" and it can speed up the warm-up process.
2- Don't bypass her neck or ears.
The feeling she gets when you kiss, nuzzle or lick her neck is likely 10 times as good as what you feel when she does the same to you. Her neck is one of the fastest ways to turn her on with the least effort. Be gentle with a moist tongue and soft lips, and you will have her moaning into your ear in no time. The front of her neck near her jugular is the most sensitive, but all over is good.
Ears are also a highly erogenous area, but there is a technique to giving good ear. Some heavy breathing, nibbling and tongue action are all interesting and evocative sensations, whereas talking, loud "mwaack" kisses and slobbery licks are all definite no-nos. The trick to this is alternation; don't keep doing the same thing all the time. Instead, go from mouth to neck to ear to neck to breast, and so on.
Find out if you should thank her for great sex, whether it truly doesn't bother her when you come too soon, and more...
3- Never say thank you for fellatio or sex.
This makes her feel like a hooker, so unless she is a hooker (or role playing!), refrain from thanking her. Show your appreciation in any other way you like, though, because she wants to know that she did a good job and you loved it. A thank you can come in many appropriate forms: "That was an excellent lick" or "You give the best head!" will suffice. If you really appreciated it, a foot massage and dinner would be nice... just kidding.
4- If you orgasm too soon, it is very disappointing for her.
A woman does expect a man to be able to hold onto his orgasms long enough for her to get off. There is nothing more frustrating than premature ejaculation problems, and nothing has the potential to kill a relationship faster than lack of sexual satisfaction for either partner. If this is your problem, try to sort it out -- go to a clinic, see a specialist, consult a sex therapist -- whatever you do, don't let it go on too long. If you never got to have an orgasm, would you want to have sex?
Practice masturbating differently -- get yourself nearly there, and then stop. Repeat. Practice until you get it right. If this doesn't help and you suspect it is a medical problem, seek help.
5- If you don't orgasm for ages, it can be annoying and boring for her.
Yes, yes I know, this is a sign that you're da man, right? A man who can keep going and going forever, taking his woman into the realms of ecstasy 10 times...
I have news for you: 10 is pushing it. One is normally enough, two is good, three is a bonus. By then, she's spent, just like you, after you ejaculate once.
Women don't dream of the man who can hold off orgasm all night long; they dream of the man who comes as she comes the first, second or third time. After that, it's like, "boooring, get off me!" She won't want to stop because obviously you're not done, but after all her fun is over and there isn't much hope of more, give it up already. If you are desensitized, give it a rest and come back for seconds later.
6- There is more to a breast than just a nipple.
Most men think that the nipple is the best bit and aim straight for it. This is not necessarily true; the entire breast is an oft-neglected erogenous zone. While men are busy sucking, licking, stroking, and playing with the nipples (and unfortunately sometimes biting and twisting without prior permission), the rest is often forgotten.
There can be a sensuous buildup to hitting the nipple, like foreplay for the breast. Start on the outsides (avoiding armpits at all costs unless she likes armpit action) and work your way in with a tongue or finger. Circling brings the attention to the nipple, so when you do finally touch it, it is a great pleasure. Anticipation is the key, so use it to your advantage.
Should you trim your pubic hair? Can you convince her to be naughtier?
7- Trimmed pubic hair is better even if she says she doesn't care.
If you enjoy receiving oral sex, trim your pubic hair. Lots of women won't say anything, and if they say they don't care when asked, they are probably being truthful -- only because they don't know what they're missing! Do it anyway. Trim it to about 5mm, and if you're really brave, try shaving your testicles.
This feels great for you and much better for her mouth; it is generally 20 times more enjoyable for everyone. Pubic hair is a real deterrent for a girl trying her best to lick your balls, and it can send her straight onto your penis if it gets too hairy down there. Surely you won't mind this, but there is no point in hastening the experience, now is there?
8- If you approach her in the right way, she will do almost anything.
A woman generally likes to feel in control, so when you suggest something out of the ordinary, she may react with suspicion. Who have you been talking to? Have you been sleeping with someone else to get these ideas? A defensive reaction to new ideas is a bad start. If you often encounter resistance, try a different tactic.
Magazine articles are a good way to educate her about options, especially if they are written by a woman. Find articles that have ordinary women talking about how good it was to have anal sex/have sex in a weird place/whatever you want to do, and get her to read it. She's probably left Cosmo wide open on the "Sex Tips for Men" page a few times, hoping you would read it and learn a few things, so why shouldn't you do the same?
Women's sex forums are also a good source. They give her time to read and absorb information without your opinion on the matter. Suggest it delicately, and then try to make her believe it was her idea in the first place.
No woman wants to be the one who won't play ball. Although there are things she may always say no to (anal sex and fisting perhaps), just remember it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind. Find the right method and you might just push her sexual experimentation button.
in the end
If you read this and thought, "You mean guys still don't know all this stuff?" then congratulations; you've come a long way, baby. Good luck and happy romping!